and Addressing Unusual Behavior in Mental Health Issues

Mental status

My mother used to be normal and was not picky about food, but now she refuses to eat meat and has developed strange cooking habits.
She insists on blanching vegetables, meat, and mung beans until they are fully cooked, and then cooking them again.
When shopping, she goes on impulsive buying sprees.
She has also started cutting her hair herself and wearing mismatched clothes.
When I try to communicate with her, she cannot accept that something is wrong and believes she is not ill, refusing to seek medical help.

In the past, she consulted a psychiatrist and initially accepted medication, but later claimed the pills were too bitter and stopped taking them.
Her daily routine is also irregular; she does not get enough sleep, stays up late, and refuses to share a bed with her husband.
She waits until he falls asleep before going to bed herself and wakes up very early.
She also does not take proper naps during the day and avoids sleeping with him.
My father loves her dearly and tolerates her behavior, but her cooking is chaotic, her spending is reckless, and she appears lethargic, stubborn, and childlike.
Sometimes she throws tantrums, and the whole family is reaching a breaking point.
She even hoards trash in the house.

I feel very self-conscious when I go out with her, and I don’t want my mother to continue suffering like this.
I am unsure what illness she has; her comprehension and memory are poor, and she often distorts what others say.
She cannot differentiate between jokes and serious statements.
She is unwilling to seek medical attention or take medication, believing that health supplements are the same as medicine.
She refuses to eat pill-like medications and is too lazy to chew food, only eating what she likes, such as steamed pumpkin with powdered sugar.
Her cooking is unappealing and haphazard, mixing everything together.
The entire family is struggling to cope, and I don’t know how to help her improve.

Xiao Ai, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2016/04/04

Dr. Wang Xiumei reply Psychiatry

You can first clarify your concerns regarding her sleep issues and express your care for her health.
Emphasize the impact of sleep on overall health and encourage her to seek help from a nearby psychiatric clinic to address her sleep problems.
Once at the clinic, the physician should evaluate her cognitive and perceptual issues to determine if there are any abnormalities that require further intervention.

Reply Date: 2016/04/04

More Info

It sounds like you are experiencing a very challenging situation with your mother, who seems to be exhibiting a range of unusual behaviors that could be indicative of a mental health issue. The changes you describe—such as her altered eating habits, erratic shopping behavior, poor hygiene, and difficulties with communication—are concerning and suggest that she may be struggling with a significant mental health condition.

From your description, it appears that your mother may be exhibiting signs of a possible mood disorder, such as depression or bipolar disorder, or even a neurocognitive disorder, which can affect memory and reasoning. The fact that she has previously sought help from a psychiatrist but is now resistant to treatment is not uncommon in individuals with mental health issues. Many people may not recognize their symptoms as problematic, which can lead to a lack of insight into their condition.

The behaviors you mentioned, such as her refusal to eat certain foods, her compulsive shopping, and her disorganized cooking, could be manifestations of underlying anxiety, obsessive-compulsive tendencies, or even a form of psychosis. Additionally, her altered sleep patterns and refusal to share a bed with your father could indicate significant emotional distress or a desire for control over her environment.

It’s important to approach this situation with empathy and understanding. Here are some steps you might consider taking:
1. Open Communication: Try to have a calm and non-confrontational conversation with your mother about your concerns. Use "I" statements to express how her behavior affects you and the family, rather than making accusatory statements that might lead to defensiveness.

2. Encourage Professional Help: While she may be resistant to seeking help, gently encourage her to see a mental health professional. You could suggest a consultation with a psychiatrist or psychologist who specializes in geriatric mental health, as they may have more experience dealing with similar cases.

3. Family Support: Involve other family members in the conversation. Sometimes, hearing concerns from multiple loved ones can help her realize the seriousness of the situation.

4. Educate Yourself: Learn more about mental health issues, particularly those that may relate to her symptoms. Understanding her condition can help you communicate more effectively and provide better support.

5. Seek Support for Yourself: Caring for someone with mental health issues can be emotionally draining. Consider seeking support for yourself, whether through counseling or support groups for families dealing with similar situations.

6. Safety and Well-being: If her behavior poses a risk to herself or others, it may be necessary to seek emergency help. In some cases, involuntary hospitalization may be required to ensure her safety.

7. Patience and Compassion: Understand that recovery and acceptance of mental health issues can be a long process. Be patient and compassionate, both with your mother and yourself.

In conclusion, your mother’s behaviors are concerning and warrant professional evaluation. Mental health issues can be complex and multifaceted, and it’s crucial to approach the situation with care and understanding. Encourage her to seek help while also taking care of your own emotional well-being. Remember, you are not alone in this, and there are resources available to support both you and your mother.

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