Psychological counseling
I have always struggled with intrusive thoughts that make me anxious and worried about what to do.
Recently, people around me have distanced themselves because of my overthinking, and I really want to understand these issues, which is why I came here to ask for help.
I get nervous easily and often feel like crying, but I pretend to be cheerful and optimistic in front of my friends.
When I'm alone, I start to overthink and fear that I haven't done something right.
I constantly ruminate on negative outcomes of events that haven't even happened yet, worrying about what if it involves me.
This leads me to repeatedly seek reassurance.
I fear others' judgments and feel insecure, making it hard to fully trust people when forming friendships.
I often wonder if they will leave me or dislike me, even if they assure me otherwise.
The insecurity is overwhelming, and I keep thinking if I said something wrong or if they dislike me.
I feel like I will lose them and be disliked.
If someone around me is in a bad mood, I question if it's my fault or if I did something wrong, which makes me anxious about them leaving me.
I easily feel anxious, and repetitive sounds at the same frequency make me feel tense and panicked.
I want to cry and escape, unsure of what to do in crowds.
I feel like everyone is staring at me, and I unconsciously sweat, fearing that something is wrong with me.
I dread talking to unfamiliar people and often avoid making eye contact.
Sometimes, I really don't want to do anything and feel powerless and unhappy, but I put on a façade of being cheerful and fine in front of others.
Inside, I feel anxious, uneasy, and disappointed.
Sometimes I can't sleep unless I'm completely exhausted, and I can suddenly become very angry or very low, with extreme mood swings.
I feel useless and struggle to find any value in myself.
I don't want to do anything.
If I want to resolve these issues, what should I do?
J, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2016/05/30
Dr. Zhong Mingxun reply Psychiatry
You have a lot of insecurity and find it difficult to fully trust others, and you also struggle to trust yourself.
I recommend that you seek long-term psychotherapy, as it may provide you with a better chance of overcoming this predicament.
Reply Date: 2016/05/30
More Info
It sounds like you're experiencing a significant amount of anxiety and overthinking, which can be incredibly challenging to navigate. Your feelings of insecurity, fear of judgment, and the pressure to maintain a facade of being cheerful and optimistic in front of others are common among individuals who struggle with anxiety. It's important to recognize that you're not alone in this experience, and there are ways to address these feelings and improve your mental health.
Firstly, it's crucial to understand that anxiety often stems from a fear of the unknown or a perceived lack of control over situations. This can lead to overthinking, where you find yourself ruminating on potential negative outcomes and worrying excessively about what others think of you. This cycle can be exhausting and can lead to feelings of inadequacy and low self-worth. It's essential to acknowledge these feelings without judgment and to understand that they are valid responses to stress and anxiety.
One effective approach to managing anxiety is to practice mindfulness and grounding techniques. Mindfulness involves being present in the moment and observing your thoughts and feelings without trying to change them. This can help you create a space between your thoughts and your reactions, allowing you to respond to anxiety in a more measured way. Techniques such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or guided imagery can also help calm your mind and body when you feel overwhelmed.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is another effective method for addressing anxiety and overthinking. CBT focuses on identifying and challenging negative thought patterns and replacing them with more balanced and realistic thoughts. For example, if you find yourself thinking, "Everyone is judging me," you can challenge that thought by asking yourself, "What evidence do I have that supports this belief?" Often, you'll find that these thoughts are exaggerated or unfounded.
Additionally, it may be beneficial to seek support from a mental health professional. A therapist can provide you with tools and strategies tailored to your specific needs and help you work through your feelings of anxiety and insecurity. They can also help you explore the underlying causes of your anxiety, which may include past experiences or current stressors in your life.
Building a support network is also vital. While you may feel the need to put on a brave face in front of friends, sharing your struggles with trusted individuals can foster deeper connections and provide you with the support you need. You might be surprised to find that others have similar experiences and can relate to what you're going through.
In terms of practical steps, consider incorporating regular physical activity into your routine. Exercise has been shown to reduce anxiety and improve mood. Even simple activities like walking, yoga, or dancing can be beneficial. Additionally, ensure that you're getting enough sleep, as fatigue can exacerbate feelings of anxiety and irritability.
Lastly, be gentle with yourself. It's okay to have bad days and to feel overwhelmed. Recognizing that you are doing your best in a challenging situation is important. Celebrate small victories, whether it's getting through a social situation or allowing yourself to feel your emotions without judgment.
In summary, addressing anxiety and overthinking involves a combination of self-awareness, mindfulness, cognitive restructuring, and seeking support. By taking proactive steps and being kind to yourself, you can work towards a healthier mindset and a more fulfilling life. Remember, it's okay to ask for help, and taking that first step can lead to significant improvements in your mental health.
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