Fluctuating Sexual Desire and Performance Issues in Men - Urology

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Instability of endurance?


I remember that a couple of years ago, there was a period when I had little sexual desire, and during intercourse with my partner, I didn't feel particularly firm.
I recall that after that period, everything returned to normal.
Typically, our sexual encounters last around twenty minutes, and everything was fine until recently when I started feeling that lack of interest again.
When I have intercourse with my partner or when she provides me with oral sex, I ejaculate much faster than usual, around five minutes.
My partner has asked me why I have changed so much.
Could this situation be due to poor mental health, lack of exercise, or some other issue? This feeling of wanting more but not being able to is quite unpleasant.
Thank you, doctor!

Nuo Nuo, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2020/08/01

Dr. Du Shixi reply Urology


Hello: You should seek medical attention.
Some outpatient patients delay seeking care when they have symptoms, which can lead to a longer treatment period.
Wishing you good health.

Reply Date: 2020/08/01

More Info


Fluctuating sexual desire and performance issues in men can be a complex interplay of physical, psychological, and emotional factors. It is not uncommon for men to experience variations in their sexual desire and performance over time. These fluctuations can be influenced by a variety of factors, including stress, anxiety, lifestyle choices, and even hormonal changes.

Firstly, it is important to recognize that sexual desire is not a constant; it can ebb and flow due to numerous influences. Stress is one of the most significant factors that can impact sexual desire and performance. When a person is under stress—whether from work, relationships, or other life pressures—this can lead to a decrease in libido and difficulties in achieving or maintaining an erection. The body's response to stress involves the release of hormones like cortisol, which can inhibit sexual function.

Additionally, mental health plays a crucial role in sexual performance. Conditions such as anxiety and depression can significantly affect sexual desire and performance. If you are feeling anxious about your sexual performance or are preoccupied with worries about your relationship, this can create a cycle of anxiety that further diminishes your sexual experience. It is essential to address any underlying mental health issues, as they can have a profound impact on your sexual health.

Physical health is another critical aspect to consider. Factors such as diet, exercise, and overall fitness can influence sexual performance. Regular physical activity can enhance blood flow, improve mood, and increase energy levels, all of which can contribute to a healthier sex life. Conversely, a sedentary lifestyle, poor diet, and lack of exercise can lead to decreased libido and performance issues.
Hormonal changes can also play a role in fluctuating sexual desire. Testosterone, the primary male sex hormone, is vital for sexual function. Levels of testosterone can decrease with age, but they can also be affected by lifestyle factors such as obesity, lack of exercise, and poor diet. If you are experiencing significant changes in your sexual desire or performance, it may be worth discussing with a healthcare provider to rule out any hormonal imbalances.

Regarding your specific situation, where you have experienced periods of low sexual desire and rapid ejaculation, it may be beneficial to explore these feelings further. The fact that you have noticed a pattern—where your sexual desire fluctuates and your performance varies—suggests that there may be underlying psychological or emotional factors at play. It could be helpful to keep a journal of your feelings, stress levels, and any other factors that may correlate with these changes. This can provide insight into what might be triggering these fluctuations.

Moreover, communication with your partner is crucial. Discussing your feelings and experiences openly can help alleviate some of the pressure you may be feeling. It can also foster a supportive environment where both partners can explore their needs and desires together.

If these issues persist, consider seeking help from a mental health professional or a sex therapist. They can provide strategies to manage anxiety, improve communication with your partner, and enhance your overall sexual health. Therapy can also help you explore any deeper emotional issues that may be contributing to your experiences.

In summary, fluctuating sexual desire and performance issues are common and can be influenced by a multitude of factors, including stress, mental health, physical health, and hormonal changes. Understanding these factors and addressing them holistically can lead to improved sexual health and satisfaction. If the issues continue to affect your quality of life, do not hesitate to seek professional help.

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