Is It Normal for Your Penis to Soften During Masturbation? - Urology

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State during masturbation?


I would like to ask the doctor: Sometimes when I am close to ejaculation during masturbation, I release my grip to let my penis calm down and avoid premature ejaculation.
During this period of relaxation, my penis becomes slightly soft and is not as firm as when I am close to ejaculation.
Is this normal?

Mr. N, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2021/07/10

Dr. Du Shixi reply Urology


Hello: This is considered normal; you can observe it further.
Wishing you good health.

Reply Date: 2021/07/10

More Info


It is quite common for the penis to soften during masturbation, especially when you intentionally loosen your grip or pause for a moment. This phenomenon can be attributed to several physiological and psychological factors.

Firstly, during sexual arousal and stimulation, the body goes through a series of physiological changes. The penis becomes erect due to increased blood flow, which is facilitated by the relaxation of the blood vessels and the engorgement of erectile tissue. However, when you stop stimulating the penis—whether by loosening your grip or taking a break—the blood flow may decrease, leading to a reduction in rigidity. This is a normal response and does not necessarily indicate any underlying health issues.

Secondly, psychological factors play a significant role in sexual arousal and performance. If you are focusing on delaying ejaculation or trying to control your arousal, this can create a shift in your mental state. Anxiety or distraction can lead to a decrease in arousal, which may cause the penis to soften. It’s important to remember that sexual arousal is not solely a physical process; it is also heavily influenced by mental and emotional states.

Additionally, the concept of "performance anxiety" can come into play. If you are worried about ejaculating too soon or not being able to maintain an erection, this anxiety can affect your ability to stay aroused. It’s essential to create a relaxed environment and focus on pleasure rather than performance.

In terms of frequency and context, many men experience fluctuations in erection quality during masturbation or sexual activity. It is not uncommon for erections to vary in hardness based on factors such as fatigue, stress, or even the position you are in. For instance, some men may find that they have stronger erections when lying down compared to standing up, as gravity and blood flow dynamics can affect erection quality.

If you notice that your erections are consistently soft or if you experience difficulty maintaining an erection during sexual activity, it may be worth consulting a healthcare professional. Conditions such as erectile dysfunction (ED) can arise from various factors, including hormonal imbalances, vascular issues, or psychological concerns. However, occasional softening during masturbation, especially when you are intentionally trying to control your arousal, is generally considered normal.

In summary, it is perfectly normal for your penis to soften during masturbation, especially when you take a break or loosen your grip. This can be attributed to the natural physiological response of blood flow changes and the psychological aspects of arousal. If you have ongoing concerns about your sexual health or performance, seeking advice from a healthcare provider can provide you with personalized insights and reassurance. Remember, sexual health is an important aspect of overall well-being, and open discussions about these topics can help alleviate concerns and promote a healthy sexual experience.

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