Supporting a Boyfriend with Bipolar Disorder: Seeking Help and Understanding

Q: Supporting a Boyfriend with Bipolar Disorder: Seeking Help and Understanding

Hello, online friend： Bipolar disorder is a treatable condition, and the earlier the treatment begins, the better the outcomes tend to be. <br>It is advisable to encourage him to seek help, especially since he has been experiencing insomnia and emotional instability lately, which

I am very worried about my boyfriend who has bipolar disorder?

Hello Doctor, about a month ago, my boyfriend of seven years began to show symptoms of a manic episode associated with bipolar disorder, and now he exhibits all the symptoms completely.
The changes in his thoughts and behaviors have transformed him into a different person.
I initially thought I could support him emotionally, but the current situation feels overwhelming.

He used to have a stable income, but during his episodes, his perception of money has drastically changed.
He has made reckless investments in things he previously deemed scams, and despite knowing he can't recover the money, he has invested all of his remaining cash.
He is now heavily in debt, and it's difficult to reverse the situation.
He remains resistant to accepting any outside opinions.
Recently, during some arguments, he has expressed suicidal thoughts, such as wanting to jump out of the window or grabbing a knife to harm himself.
He has been pressuring me to borrow money from various sources, even small amounts, and becomes furious and blames me when I can't.
He shows no insight into his condition.
I tried to gently suggest seeing a doctor, but he reacted strongly against it, crying and insisting that everyone is saying he is sick.
He believes he is just growing and becoming stronger.
A friend who has been in a psychiatric facility for bipolar disorder suggested that I consider involuntary hospitalization.
After much contemplation, I feel this may be the only option, but I fear his misunderstanding and resentment afterward.
I feel like I am his weakness, and I shouldn't abandon him during his most vulnerable time, as it would be a significant blow to him.
However, after this month, I feel like I am also becoming affected by his condition.
I apologize for the lengthy message.
I have summarized the symptoms related to emotions, social interactions, and thoughts.
I hope the doctor can provide me with some advice.
Thank you.

Niming, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2021/07/27

Dr. Wu Enliang reply Psychiatry

Hello, online friend: Bipolar disorder is a treatable condition, and the earlier the treatment begins, the better the outcomes tend to be.
It is advisable to encourage him to seek help, especially since he has been experiencing insomnia and emotional instability lately, which may indicate a mental health crisis.
You could accompany him to a mental health facility for evaluation, as your support may increase his willingness to seek treatment.
If this proves difficult, you can also reach out to a public health nurse at your local health center for assistance.
Of course, if there are any tendencies towards self-harm or suicidal thoughts, it is crucial to prioritize safety, and you can request police intervention for emergency medical transport.
Many patients who have received help later express gratitude for the intervention during times when their judgment was impaired.
Please take care of your own mental and physical well-being as well, and consider talking to professionals for support.
Dr.
Wu Enliang

Reply Date: 2021/07/27

More Info

Supporting a partner with bipolar disorder can be incredibly challenging, especially when they are experiencing a manic episode. It’s important to approach the situation with empathy, understanding, and a clear plan for how to help them while also taking care of your own mental health. Here are some strategies and insights that may help you navigate this difficult time.

Understanding Bipolar Disorder
Bipolar disorder is characterized by extreme mood swings that include emotional highs (mania or hypomania) and lows (depression). During manic episodes, individuals may exhibit increased energy, reduced need for sleep, impulsive behavior, and poor decision-making, such as reckless spending or risky investments. It’s crucial to recognize that these behaviors are symptoms of the disorder and not a reflection of your boyfriend’s true character.

Recognizing the Signs
From your description, it seems that your boyfriend is currently in a manic phase, which can lead to dangerous behaviors, including suicidal thoughts and self-harm. It’s essential to take these signs seriously. If he expresses suicidal thoughts or engages in self-harm, it’s vital to seek immediate help. This could involve contacting a mental health professional, a crisis hotline, or taking him to the emergency room.

Encouraging Treatment
Encouraging your boyfriend to seek treatment can be difficult, especially if he is resistant to the idea. Here are some strategies to consider:
1. Open Communication: Approach the topic gently. Instead of framing it as him having a “problem,” you might express concern for his well-being and how much you care about him. Use “I” statements, such as “I feel worried when I see you struggling,” rather than “You need help.”
2. Educate Yourself: Understanding bipolar disorder can help you communicate more effectively. Share information about the condition and its treatment options with him. Sometimes, hearing about the experiences of others with bipolar disorder can help him recognize his symptoms.

3. Suggest a Professional: If he has a trusted friend or family member, consider involving them in the conversation. Sometimes, hearing the same message from multiple sources can help him feel less isolated and more willing to seek help.

4. Intervention: If he continues to refuse help and his behavior escalates, you may need to consider a more direct approach, such as a structured intervention. This involves gathering friends and family to express their concerns in a supportive manner.

Taking Care of Yourself
Supporting someone with bipolar disorder can take a toll on your mental health. It’s essential to prioritize your well-being:
- Set Boundaries: It’s okay to set limits on what you can handle. If his behavior becomes abusive or harmful to you, it’s crucial to protect yourself.

- Seek Support: Consider talking to a therapist or joining a support group for partners of individuals with bipolar disorder. Sharing your experiences with others who understand can provide relief and guidance.

- Practice Self-Care: Engage in activities that help you relax and recharge. This could include exercise, meditation, or spending time with friends.

When to Seek Immediate Help
If your boyfriend exhibits signs of severe mania, such as engaging in dangerous behaviors, expressing suicidal thoughts, or becoming violent, it’s crucial to seek immediate help. This may involve contacting mental health professionals or emergency services.

Conclusion
Supporting a partner with bipolar disorder requires patience, understanding, and sometimes tough love. While it’s important to be there for him, remember that you cannot fix his condition; only he can take the steps toward recovery. Encourage him to seek professional help, and don’t hesitate to reach out for support yourself. Your well-being is just as important in this journey.

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