the Differences in Sexual Pleasure Between Men and Women

Why is the pleasure experienced by men not as intense as that experienced by women?

When sexual tension is high, it feels good, but it can lead to premature ejaculation.
After ejaculation, the sexual tension decreases, making it less likely to experience premature ejaculation, but there is almost no sensation; only when nearing climax is there a slight feeling.
Being a woman seems advantageous; why is that? According to an article I found online titled "The Sexual Endurance Limits of Women," from a physiological perspective and excluding any pathological conditions or special social situations (such as rape), women's sexual capacity is almost limitless.
They do not have a penis and do not need to exert effort like men to achieve and maintain an erection.
Notably, women do not experience a physiological "refractory period" and do not have post-coital flaccidity.
Therefore, they can objectively engage in high-frequency sexual activity at any time.
Similarly, the intensity of women's sexual activity is only limited by their physical stamina, without the concern of penile flaccidity that men face.
Additionally, women have more and broader areas of sexual sensitivity on their bodies compared to men, allowing them to vary their sexual behaviors more than men can.
Finally, women can achieve an unlimited number of orgasms consecutively, which is something men cannot match.
Confucianism and Taoism have long recognized this.
However, to maintain the male-centered society of the time, both were deeply fearful of this reality.
Confucianism advocated that "a woman's lack of sexuality is virtue" to suppress women's sexual capabilities, while Taoism promoted men's "conservation of essence" to counterbalance women's limitless sexual abilities.
These two sexual cultural traditions have deeply ingrained themselves in the hearts of Chinese women, distorting and alienating their sexuality.
This leads to a dual sexual repression in their personal lives.
Before starting a sexual life, women often involuntarily feel that sexuality is a male domain and that women should not actively seek it.
Even after breaking through this psychological barrier in a relatively fulfilling sexual life, women struggle to learn how to fully enjoy their inherent sexual capabilities.
Unmarried women who dare to express their sexual arousal, sexual dreams, or sexual responses are often seen by men as easy targets, while other women may label them as "promiscuous." As a result, a woman's wedding night often becomes a mere "rite of passage," leading to various unnecessary physical and mental distress, even pain.
After marriage, women's sexuality is still viewed as solely for serving their husbands, as if merely not refusing their husband's sexual demands equates to having good sexual ability.
If a wife dares to express a need for more orgasms, she may be seen as "greedy." If she proposes any specific sexual requests, her husband may consider her "unvirtuous" and question, "Who taught you that?" International feminism posits that male and female sexuality is homologous and is merely shaped by centuries of male-centered society, resulting in a cultural system that severely represses women's sexual capabilities and expressions.
Women have been gradually conditioned and trained to become "asexual beings," often without realizing it, believing that women are inherently this way.
Feminism argues that women's liberation and gender equality must encompass sexuality, restoring the true nature of women's sexual physiology, allowing women to spontaneously, autonomously, consciously, and self-regulate to fully enjoy their inherent sexual capabilities and pleasures.
If women still do not dare to acknowledge and utilize their limitless sexual abilities, they cannot attain the equal status and autonomy (not power!) in their sexual lives, nor can they achieve equality in other aspects of social life.
Previously, we have introduced too little about the sexual theories of the international women's movement.
Therefore, for some educated Chinese women, discussing the physiological drives of sexuality seems lowbrow and vulgar, denying the nobility of love, and even degrading women.
In fact, it is precisely in cultures that fully respect women's sexual abilities and rights that the banner of love flies higher than ours.
Now, regarding this article, which resonates with my feelings, I ask you, doctor, honestly, do you envy women and think it is better to be a woman?

Tor, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2003/05/01

Dr. Huang Chikai reply Urology

Hello Tor,
Thank you for forwarding such a great article.
To be honest, I do not envy women because whether one is male or female is not something we can choose.
As a man, one should fulfill the role of a good man, and if one were a woman, then fulfill the role of a good woman.
Beyond sexuality, there are many other responsibilities for both genders.
You are still young, and in the pursuit of life, there are many worthwhile endeavors beyond sexuality that we should strive for.
Wishing you all the best!
Dr.
Huang Chih-Kai
May 1, 2003, 5:20 PM

Reply Date: 2003/05/01

More Info

Understanding the differences in sexual pleasure between men and women is a complex topic that encompasses biological, psychological, and sociocultural factors. It is important to note that sexual pleasure is subjective and can vary widely among individuals, regardless of gender. However, there are some general trends and differences that can be observed.

From a biological perspective, men and women experience sexual arousal and pleasure differently. Men typically have a more straightforward physiological response to sexual stimuli, primarily driven by testosterone. This can lead to quicker arousal and a more direct path to orgasm. However, this can also result in issues such as premature ejaculation, where the excitement can lead to a rapid climax, often before full sexual satisfaction is achieved.

In contrast, women often experience a more complex sexual response cycle. Women may take longer to become aroused, but they also have the potential for multiple orgasms and a broader range of sexual experiences. This is partly due to the anatomical structure of female genitalia, which includes numerous sensitive areas that can contribute to pleasure. Women do not experience a refractory period in the same way men do, allowing for the possibility of engaging in sexual activity multiple times in a shorter period without the need for recovery.

Psychologically, the differences in sexual pleasure can also be influenced by societal norms and expectations. Historically, many cultures have placed a strong emphasis on male sexual pleasure while often neglecting or suppressing female sexual desire. This has led to a cultural narrative that can make women feel guilty or ashamed about their sexual needs and desires. In many societies, women have been conditioned to view sex primarily as a means of fulfilling male desire, which can inhibit their ability to fully embrace and enjoy their own sexual pleasure.

Moreover, the concept of sexual agency is crucial in understanding these differences. Women are often socialized to be more passive in sexual situations, which can affect their ability to communicate their desires and preferences. This lack of agency can lead to a disconnect between what they want and what they experience during sexual encounters. On the other hand, men are often encouraged to be assertive and pursue sexual pleasure, which can create a disparity in sexual satisfaction between genders.

The feminist movement has played a significant role in challenging these traditional narratives and advocating for women's sexual rights and pleasure. It emphasizes the importance of recognizing women's sexual autonomy and the need for open discussions about female pleasure. This shift in perspective encourages women to explore their desires and communicate openly with their partners, leading to more fulfilling sexual experiences.

In conclusion, while there are biological differences in how men and women experience sexual pleasure, the psychological and sociocultural factors are equally significant. Understanding these differences requires a holistic approach that considers individual experiences and societal influences. It is essential for both men and women to engage in open conversations about their sexual needs and desires, fostering an environment where both partners can explore and enjoy their sexuality without shame or stigma. This not only enhances individual sexual experiences but also contributes to healthier and more equitable relationships.

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