Erectile Issues: Why Can't I Ejaculate During Intercourse? - Urology

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Hello Doctor, I apologize for taking up your time.
When I am intimate with my girlfriend, everything seems normal and I can achieve an erection.
However, when I penetrate, I feel like I cannot fully envelop my penis, although I still have sensation and can last for a long time.
The issue is that I am unable to ejaculate.
However, I can ejaculate when I am doing it myself.
My penis has a slight left curvature; could this be the reason I am unable to ejaculate? Thank you for your help.

JOE, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2003/05/06

Dr. Huang Chikai reply Urology


Hello JOE,
The inability to ejaculate is not related to a left curvature.
Otherwise, you should also be unable to ejaculate during DIY.
There are many other factors involved.
I recommend that you visit our Sexual Wellness Center for a diagnosis and explanation from a specialist.
Wishing you happiness!
Dr.
Huang Chih-Kai
May 6, 2003, 9:00 AM.

Reply Date: 2003/05/06

More Info


Erectile issues, particularly the inability to ejaculate during intercourse while being able to do so during masturbation, can be a complex problem that involves both physical and psychological factors. This phenomenon is not uncommon and can be influenced by a variety of elements, including anxiety, arousal levels, and even anatomical considerations.

Firstly, it is essential to understand that sexual arousal and ejaculation are regulated by a combination of psychological and physiological processes. When you are engaged in sexual activity with your partner, various factors such as performance anxiety, stress, or even the dynamics of the relationship can affect your ability to reach orgasm. This is particularly true if you feel pressure to perform or if you are overly focused on the act itself rather than enjoying the moment.
In your case, you mentioned that you experience a sensation of not being able to "wrap" around your penis during intercourse, despite being able to maintain an erection and feeling pleasure. This could be related to several factors:
1. Anatomical Considerations: The curvature of your penis, which you noted is bent to the left, may affect how you experience penetration. Depending on the angle and depth of penetration, this could create discomfort or a sensation that makes it difficult to reach ejaculation. It’s important to communicate with your partner about what feels good and to explore different positions that might alleviate any discomfort.

2. Psychological Factors: As mentioned earlier, anxiety and stress can play a significant role in sexual performance. If you are worried about not being able to ejaculate, this concern can create a cycle of anxiety that makes it even harder to achieve orgasm. It may be beneficial to practice relaxation techniques or mindfulness during sexual activity to help reduce anxiety.

3. Physical Factors: Sometimes, physical issues such as hormonal imbalances, nerve damage, or other medical conditions can affect ejaculation. If this issue persists, it may be worth consulting a healthcare professional to rule out any underlying medical concerns.

4. Differences Between Intercourse and Masturbation: Many men find that they can ejaculate more easily during masturbation than during intercourse. This could be due to the fact that masturbation allows for more control over stimulation and the environment, which can be less distracting than the dynamics of partnered sex.

To address your concerns, consider the following steps:
- Communication: Talk openly with your partner about your experiences and feelings. This can help reduce performance pressure and create a more relaxed atmosphere.

- Experimentation: Try different sexual positions or techniques that may enhance your comfort and pleasure. Sometimes, changing the angle or depth of penetration can make a significant difference.

- Relaxation Techniques: Engage in relaxation practices such as deep breathing or mindfulness exercises before and during sexual activity to help alleviate anxiety.

- Consult a Professional: If the issue continues or worsens, it may be beneficial to speak with a healthcare provider or a sex therapist. They can provide tailored advice and explore any potential medical issues that may be contributing to your difficulties.

In conclusion, while it can be frustrating to experience difficulties with ejaculation during intercourse, it is essential to approach the situation with patience and understanding. By addressing both the physical and psychological aspects of the issue, you can work towards a more satisfying sexual experience.

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