Memory Issues: Is It Dementia or Just Aging?

Q: Memory Issues: Is It Dementia or Just Aging?

Recommendation： Consult with a psychiatrist at a mental health clinic. <br>Thank you. <br>Wishing you good health!

Taking credit for someone else's words as if they were your own?

Hello, doctor.
I would like to ask: On the evening of the 25th of last month, I was on the phone with my mother (64 years old) discussing handmade teacher greeting cards I made during my school days.
My mother remarked that they looked like garbage, which really hurt my feelings, but I tried to brush it off and joked that those cards were indeed poorly made.
After about five minutes, I honestly told her that her comment made me sad, but to my surprise, she insisted she never said they looked like garbage; she claimed she said they were "black and messy." We ended up arguing, and she not only failed to recall her own words but also yelled at me, saying I no longer had her as a mother and should find a godmother instead.
Since there was no recording of the conversation, I felt powerless to prove my point.
Then today (May 1st), when we were discussing things, she told me not to be "gray" (in Taiwanese).
I explained that I was seriously discussing the matter, but soon after, she claimed she never said I was being "gray," but rather that she was talking about discussion (again taking my words as her own).
However, this time she did remember her own words were about "swinging," not discussing, and she mentioned that after dedicating her life to us, making a mistake in her words should be forgiven.
I would like to ask: Is my mother's behavior a sign of dementia, or is it simply normal cognitive decline? Thank you.

111, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2023/05/01

Dr. Xue Gengming reply Psychiatry

Recommendation: Consult with a psychiatrist at a mental health clinic.
Thank you.
Wishing you good health!

Reply Date: 2023/05/01

More Info

Your concerns about your mother's memory issues are valid and reflect a common worry among families as they observe changes in their loved ones. Memory problems can arise from various causes, and distinguishing between normal aging, mild cognitive impairment, and dementia can be challenging.

From your description, it seems your mother is experiencing some confusion regarding her recollections and may be misinterpreting your statements. This could be indicative of several factors, including normal age-related cognitive decline, stress, or even emotional factors that can affect memory and perception.

Understanding Memory Changes
1. Normal Aging vs. Dementia: As people age, it is common to experience some decline in memory and cognitive function. This can manifest as occasional forgetfulness or difficulty in recalling names or recent events. However, dementia is characterized by more severe memory loss and cognitive decline that interferes with daily life and activities. Symptoms of dementia include:
- Difficulty remembering recent events or conversations.

- Confusion about time or place.

- Difficulty with problem-solving or planning.

- Changes in mood or personality.

2. Miscommunication and Memory: The incidents you described, where your mother misremembers what she said or attributes your statements to herself, could be due to a variety of reasons. Stress, fatigue, or even emotional distress can lead to lapses in memory or miscommunication. It's important to consider the context of these interactions. If your mother is under stress or feeling overwhelmed, this could exacerbate her memory issues.

3. Emotional Factors: Emotional health plays a significant role in cognitive function. Anxiety, depression, and stress can all impact memory. If your mother is feeling anxious or depressed, this could contribute to her memory lapses and confusion.

Next Steps
1. Observation: Continue to observe your mother's behavior and memory patterns. Note if these issues are becoming more frequent or if they are isolated incidents.
2. Consult a Professional: If you notice a pattern of memory loss or if her behavior becomes more concerning, it would be wise to consult a healthcare professional. A neurologist or geriatrician can conduct a thorough evaluation, which may include cognitive testing and a review of her medical history.

3. Cognitive Assessments: Tests such as the Mini-Mental State Examination (MMSE) or the Montreal Cognitive Assessment (MoCA) can help determine the extent of cognitive impairment. These assessments can provide a clearer picture of whether your mother is experiencing normal aging or something more serious.

4. Lifestyle Factors: Encourage your mother to engage in activities that promote brain health, such as regular physical exercise, a balanced diet, social interactions, and mental exercises like puzzles or reading. These activities can help maintain cognitive function.

5. Support: Emotional support is crucial. Engage in open conversations with your mother about her feelings and experiences. Sometimes, simply discussing these issues can alleviate stress and improve communication.

Conclusion
While your mother's memory issues may be concerning, they do not necessarily indicate the onset of dementia. It is essential to approach the situation with care, ensuring that she receives the support she needs. Monitoring her cognitive health and seeking professional advice will be key in addressing any potential issues. Remember, early intervention can make a significant difference in managing cognitive decline and improving quality of life.

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