Is it caused by excessive DIY activities?
Dr.
Hsu: Thank you for your detailed response last time.
I later consulted a doctor and took a medication that helps with firmness and duration, but I found that during normal intercourse with my girlfriend, ejaculation doesn't happen smoothly.
Instead, I need to use my hand to reach a certain point before I can ejaculate.
My girlfriend also read some articles online, and she mentioned that it might be because I was too vigorous with manual stimulation in the past, making it difficult for her to provide the same level of stimulation during intercourse, which leads to my inability to ejaculate normally.
What are some ways to improve or resolve this situation? Can medication help? Should I refrain from manual stimulation, or what should I do? I'm feeling quite anxious about this.
:((
Xiao Meng, 40~49 year old female. Ask Date: 2004/01/05
Dr. Xu Weikai reply Urology
Xiao Meng: Hello, regarding your question, it is possible that long-term DIY activities may lead to a need for greater stimulation for ejaculation.
However, from another perspective, this might indicate that your sexual activities need to be enhanced and are not yet well-coordinated.
Trying different positions and improving techniques could be helpful.
Additionally, consider whether the duration of the erection is too long.
Generally, prolonged erections can affect ejaculation due to nerve excitation.
Note: Typically, during DIY, the process is quick and there are usually no issues with ejaculation.
In your case, I believe there is currently no need for medication; it is likely due to the two situations mentioned above.
If ejaculation can occur during DIY, there should not be any ejaculation issues; it is just a matter of insufficient stimulation or prolonged erection.
Director of Urology, Taitung Hospital, Xu Weikai.
Reply Date: 2004/01/05
More Info
Excessive DIY, particularly in the context of sexual stimulation, can indeed lead to various urological issues, including difficulties with ejaculation during intercourse. This phenomenon is often linked to a few key factors: desensitization, psychological conditioning, and physical changes in the genital area.
Desensitization
When individuals frequently engage in manual stimulation (DIY) that is more intense or different from the sensations experienced during intercourse, they may become desensitized to the normal stimuli provided by a partner. This desensitization can make it more challenging to achieve orgasm or ejaculation during penetrative sex. The body becomes accustomed to a specific type of stimulation, and anything less intense may not elicit the same response.
Psychological Conditioning
The mind plays a significant role in sexual function. If you have conditioned yourself to rely on manual stimulation to reach orgasm, this can create a psychological barrier during intercourse. You may find yourself unable to relax or focus on the sensations provided by your partner, leading to performance anxiety or difficulty achieving climax. This can create a cycle where the fear of not being able to ejaculate during sex reinforces the problem.
Physical Changes
Frequent and vigorous DIY can also lead to physical changes in the genital area. For instance, excessive friction or pressure can cause irritation or changes in sensitivity. If the tissues become inflamed or overly sensitive, this can further complicate the ability to achieve ejaculation during intercourse.
Recommendations for Improvement
1. Reduce DIY Frequency: Consider reducing the frequency and intensity of DIY sessions. This may help your body recalibrate to the sensations experienced during intercourse.
2. Focus on Partner Stimulation: During sexual activity with your partner, try to focus on the sensations and emotional connection rather than solely on the goal of ejaculation. This can help alleviate performance anxiety and allow for a more natural experience.
3. Communication with Partner: Openly discuss your concerns with your partner. This can help both of you understand each other's needs and work together to find what feels best for both of you.
4. Explore Different Techniques: Experiment with different positions or techniques during intercourse that may provide more stimulation. Sometimes, changing the dynamics can lead to better outcomes.
5. Consult a Specialist: If the issue persists, consider consulting a urologist or a sexual health specialist. They can provide tailored advice and may suggest therapies or medications that can help.
6. Therapy: If psychological factors are contributing to your difficulties, speaking with a therapist who specializes in sexual health can be beneficial. They can help address any underlying anxiety or conditioning that may be affecting your sexual performance.
Medication
While medications can assist with erectile function or libido, they may not directly address the issue of ejaculation during intercourse. It's essential to discuss your specific concerns with your healthcare provider, who can help determine if medication is appropriate for your situation.
In conclusion, while excessive DIY can lead to challenges in sexual performance, there are various strategies to address these issues. By focusing on reducing reliance on manual stimulation, improving communication with your partner, and seeking professional guidance if necessary, you can work towards a more satisfying sexual experience. Remember, sexual health is a complex interplay of physical and psychological factors, and addressing both aspects is crucial for improvement.
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