Nightmares: Is Your Girlfriend Experiencing Sleep Disorders? - Psychiatry

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I want to help my girlfriend but I'm not sure if she has a parasomnia?


My girlfriend has heard that dreaming a lot at night can lead to poor sleep.
Recently, it has become more severe; no matter how long she sleeps, she still feels tired, as if she hasn't slept at all.
Her dark circles under her eyes are getting worse, and she dreams every time she sleeps.
I'm not sure if there's any help for this.
Her personality is characterized by high self-awareness, being very self-centered, and she doesn't like to hear criticism or suggestions.
She often speaks in circles, has a poor memory, is easily irritable and impatient, tends to overthink, has a quick temper, is stubborn, and likes to dwell on problems.
Recently, she often isolates herself in her room to eat and ignores people.
She frequently claims that I've said things I haven't, almost as if she is experiencing auditory hallucinations, and I wonder if this could be contributing to her issues.
Today, she even threatened to break up, and I don't understand why.
I would like to ask if the above could cause excessive dreaming, and how it can be treated.
If it's not excessive dreaming, what other conditions could it be? Our relationship is generally stable, with no major issues.

Xiao Bao, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2004/02/07

Dr. Chen Guangpeng reply Psychiatry


Dear Little Treasure Online Friend: Regarding your girlfriend's condition, it seems to involve more than just a simple sleep issue; there may be personality problems combined with emotional disturbances and sleep disorders.
A detailed diagnosis, etiology, and treatment plan require encouraging your girlfriend to visit a psychiatric or psychosomatic clinic for further physiological and psychological evaluation.
This will help establish the most suitable treatment plan.
I suggest you look for a nearby hospital, as long-term follow-up treatment may be necessary.
Wishing you both a smooth journey towards a happy relationship.

Reply Date: 2004/02/07

More Info


It sounds like your girlfriend is experiencing a complex set of symptoms that could be indicative of underlying psychological and sleep disorders. The issues you describe, such as frequent nightmares, excessive daytime fatigue, and emotional instability, suggest that she may be dealing with more than just typical sleep disturbances.

Firstly, the fact that she has a history of poor sleep quality and frequently experiences nightmares could point towards a condition known as nightmare disorder. This is characterized by recurrent nightmares that cause significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning. The emotional turmoil you describe, including her high self-awareness, irritability, and tendency to ruminate, may also suggest that she is experiencing anxiety or depressive symptoms, which can exacerbate sleep issues.

Moreover, her behavior of isolating herself and exhibiting signs of auditory hallucinations (believing you said things you did not) raises concerns about possible dissociative symptoms or other mental health issues. These could be related to stressors in her life, such as her previous relationship and current work pressures, which you mentioned have affected her mental state over the past year. The combination of these factors can create a vicious cycle where poor sleep leads to increased anxiety and emotional instability, which in turn leads to further sleep disturbances.

To address these concerns, it is crucial for her to seek professional help. A mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist, can conduct a thorough assessment to determine the underlying causes of her symptoms. This may include evaluating for conditions like generalized anxiety disorder, major depressive disorder, or even post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), especially if her previous relationship was particularly distressing.

In terms of treatment, cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) has been shown to be effective for both anxiety and sleep disorders. CBT for insomnia (CBT-I) specifically targets the thoughts and behaviors that contribute to sleep problems. Additionally, if her symptoms are severe, medication may be considered as part of her treatment plan. Antidepressants or anti-anxiety medications can help stabilize her mood and improve her sleep quality.

Encouraging her to engage in healthy sleep hygiene practices can also be beneficial. This includes establishing a regular sleep schedule, creating a relaxing bedtime routine, and minimizing exposure to screens before bed. Mindfulness and relaxation techniques, such as meditation or deep breathing exercises, can help reduce anxiety and improve her overall emotional well-being.

It’s important to approach this situation with empathy and understanding. Encourage her to talk about her feelings and experiences, and reassure her that seeking help is a sign of strength. Your support can be invaluable as she navigates this challenging time. Ultimately, with the right treatment and support, there is a strong possibility for improvement in her symptoms and overall quality of life.

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