Why does it become soft?
Hello Doctor: Recently, I have been troubled by a problem.
When I am intimate with my girlfriend, my erection is good at first, but during penetration, it gradually becomes softer and eventually goes limp.
I have tried many times but cannot achieve normal ejaculation.
I read online that one should maintain a normal lifestyle, avoid staying up late, smoking, etc., and I do not engage in those habits.
Why am I experiencing this issue? Please help me understand.
Thank you.
Lan, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2005/04/07
Dr. Lin Wenxu reply Urology
Hello Blue: Based on your description, it seems to be caused by emotional stress, which is known as psychogenic erectile dysfunction.
I recommend taking a break for a while; perhaps you could go on a vacation with your girlfriend to change your mood or try a different location.
Additionally, when you are with your girlfriend, try not to worry constantly about the possibility of losing an erection again, as this may exacerbate the psychogenic erectile dysfunction.
If the situation persists without improvement, please consult a urologist for further evaluation and treatment.
Reply Date: 2005/04/07
More Info
Erectile dysfunction (ED) during intimacy can be a distressing experience for many men, and it is important to understand that this issue can arise from a variety of physical, psychological, and relational factors. Based on your description, it seems that you are experiencing a situation where you can achieve an erection initially, but it diminishes during intercourse. This phenomenon is not uncommon and can be attributed to several underlying causes.
Physical Causes
1. Circulatory Issues: The ability to achieve and maintain an erection is heavily reliant on proper blood flow to the penis. Conditions such as high blood pressure, diabetes, and high cholesterol can impair circulation, leading to difficulties in maintaining an erection.
2. Hormonal Factors: Testosterone plays a crucial role in sexual arousal and function. Low testosterone levels can lead to reduced libido and erectile difficulties. Hormonal imbalances can stem from various health conditions or lifestyle factors.
3. Neurological Factors: Nerve damage from conditions like diabetes or multiple sclerosis can affect the signals between the brain and the penis, leading to erectile issues.
4. Medications: Certain medications, including those for high blood pressure, depression, and anxiety, can have side effects that impact erectile function.
Psychological Causes
1. Performance Anxiety: Worrying about sexual performance can create a cycle of anxiety that makes it difficult to maintain an erection. This is particularly common if you have experienced difficulties in the past.
2. Stress and Mental Health: General stress, anxiety, or depression can significantly impact sexual function. Mental health plays a crucial role in sexual arousal and performance.
3. Relationship Issues: Emotional intimacy and connection with your partner are vital for a satisfying sexual experience. If there are unresolved conflicts or lack of communication in your relationship, it can affect your ability to perform sexually.
Lifestyle Factors
1. Substance Use: While you mentioned that you do not smoke or stay up late, it’s important to consider other lifestyle factors such as alcohol consumption or recreational drug use, which can also affect erectile function.
2. Diet and Exercise: A healthy diet and regular exercise are essential for maintaining good cardiovascular health, which in turn supports erectile function. Obesity and sedentary lifestyles can contribute to ED.
Recommendations
1. Consult a Healthcare Provider: It is crucial to discuss your symptoms with a healthcare professional. They can perform a thorough evaluation, including physical examinations and possibly blood tests, to identify any underlying health issues.
2. Consider Counseling: If psychological factors are suspected, speaking with a therapist or counselor who specializes in sexual health can be beneficial. They can help address performance anxiety or relationship issues.
3. Lifestyle Modifications: Focus on maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and stress management techniques such as mindfulness or yoga can improve overall well-being and sexual function.
4. Open Communication with Your Partner: Discussing your feelings and experiences with your partner can help alleviate anxiety and strengthen your emotional connection, which may enhance your sexual experience.
5. Explore Treatment Options: If the issue persists, your doctor may discuss treatment options, including medications that can help improve erectile function.
In conclusion, erectile dysfunction during intimacy can stem from a combination of physical, psychological, and lifestyle factors. It is essential to approach this issue holistically and seek professional guidance to identify the underlying causes and appropriate treatments. Remember, you are not alone in this experience, and many men face similar challenges. Open communication with your partner and healthcare provider can lead to effective solutions and improved sexual health.
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