Erectile Issues: Why Does It Happen During Intimacy? - Urology

Share to:

Why does it become soft?


Hello Doctor: Recently, I have been troubled by a problem.
When I am intimate with my girlfriend, my erection is good at first, but during penetration, it gradually becomes softer and eventually goes limp.
I have tried many times but cannot achieve normal ejaculation.
I read online that one should maintain a normal lifestyle, avoid staying up late, smoking, etc., and I do not engage in those habits.
Why am I experiencing this issue? Please help me understand.
Thank you.

Lan, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2005/04/07

Dr. Lin Wenxu reply Urology


Hello Blue: Based on your description, it seems to be caused by emotional stress, which is known as psychogenic erectile dysfunction.
I recommend taking a break for a while; perhaps you could go on a vacation with your girlfriend to change your mood or try a different location.
Additionally, when you are with your girlfriend, try not to worry constantly about the possibility of losing an erection again, as this may exacerbate the psychogenic erectile dysfunction.
If the situation persists without improvement, please consult a urologist for further evaluation and treatment.

Reply Date: 2005/04/07

More Info


Erectile dysfunction (ED) during intimacy can be a distressing experience for many men, and it is important to understand that this issue can arise from a variety of physical, psychological, and relational factors. Based on your description, it seems that you are experiencing a situation where you can achieve an erection initially, but it diminishes during intercourse. This phenomenon is not uncommon and can be attributed to several underlying causes.


Physical Causes
1. Circulatory Issues: The ability to achieve and maintain an erection is heavily reliant on proper blood flow to the penis. Conditions such as high blood pressure, diabetes, and high cholesterol can impair circulation, leading to difficulties in maintaining an erection.

2. Hormonal Factors: Testosterone plays a crucial role in sexual arousal and function. Low testosterone levels can lead to reduced libido and erectile difficulties. Hormonal imbalances can stem from various health conditions or lifestyle factors.

3. Neurological Factors: Nerve damage from conditions like diabetes or multiple sclerosis can affect the signals between the brain and the penis, leading to erectile issues.

4. Medications: Certain medications, including those for high blood pressure, depression, and anxiety, can have side effects that impact erectile function.


Psychological Causes
1. Performance Anxiety: Worrying about sexual performance can create a cycle of anxiety that makes it difficult to maintain an erection. This is particularly common if you have experienced difficulties in the past.

2. Stress and Mental Health: General stress, anxiety, or depression can significantly impact sexual function. Mental health plays a crucial role in sexual arousal and performance.

3. Relationship Issues: Emotional intimacy and connection with your partner are vital for a satisfying sexual experience. If there are unresolved conflicts or lack of communication in your relationship, it can affect your ability to perform sexually.


Lifestyle Factors
1. Substance Use: While you mentioned that you do not smoke or stay up late, it’s important to consider other lifestyle factors such as alcohol consumption or recreational drug use, which can also affect erectile function.

2. Diet and Exercise: A healthy diet and regular exercise are essential for maintaining good cardiovascular health, which in turn supports erectile function. Obesity and sedentary lifestyles can contribute to ED.


Recommendations
1. Consult a Healthcare Provider: It is crucial to discuss your symptoms with a healthcare professional. They can perform a thorough evaluation, including physical examinations and possibly blood tests, to identify any underlying health issues.

2. Consider Counseling: If psychological factors are suspected, speaking with a therapist or counselor who specializes in sexual health can be beneficial. They can help address performance anxiety or relationship issues.

3. Lifestyle Modifications: Focus on maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and stress management techniques such as mindfulness or yoga can improve overall well-being and sexual function.

4. Open Communication with Your Partner: Discussing your feelings and experiences with your partner can help alleviate anxiety and strengthen your emotional connection, which may enhance your sexual experience.

5. Explore Treatment Options: If the issue persists, your doctor may discuss treatment options, including medications that can help improve erectile function.

In conclusion, erectile dysfunction during intimacy can stem from a combination of physical, psychological, and lifestyle factors. It is essential to approach this issue holistically and seek professional guidance to identify the underlying causes and appropriate treatments. Remember, you are not alone in this experience, and many men face similar challenges. Open communication with your partner and healthcare provider can lead to effective solutions and improved sexual health.

Similar Q&A

Understanding Why Erection Loss Occurs During Intercourse: Common Causes Explained

It sounds like you are experiencing issues with maintaining an erection during sexual activity. This could be due to a variety of factors, including psychological factors such as anxiety or stress, physical factors such as blood flow issues, or even a lack of arousal. It's i...


Dr. Xu Weikai reply Urology
Nervous person: Hello, it may be due to insufficient or lack of continuous stimulation during intercourse. If there are any unclear points, feel free to ask again, and we can discuss and research further. Answers from the internet should only be used as a reference; if necessary,...

[Read More] Understanding Why Erection Loss Occurs During Intercourse: Common Causes Explained


Understanding Erectile Issues: Why Does It Happen During Foreplay?

I have a question. Before starting, my erection is firm, but the glans is soft and seems to have insufficient blood flow. Halfway through foreplay, I lose my erection. This has been happening for over a month. What could be the problem?


Dr. Liu Jiaju reply Urology
The causes of erectile dysfunction can be categorized into psychological and organic factors. Psychological causes are often sudden, with varying severity, and there are typically no issues with morning or nighttime erections, mostly seen in younger individuals. In contrast, orga...

[Read More] Understanding Erectile Issues: Why Does It Happen During Foreplay?


Understanding Erectile Issues: Causes and Solutions for Men

Previously, I had normal erection hardness during intercourse with my girlfriend, and we could do it every day. However, recently, I don't know why I get hard during foreplay, but after a short time of penetration, I lose my erection.


Dr. Sun Hongshun reply Urology
Hello, A-Fu: Sometimes being inattentive or distracted can lead to such outcomes. The more you worry about it, the harder it is to recover. This is not a serious issue, so there's no need to be overly concerned. If you have any questions, feel free to visit the hospital for ...

[Read More] Understanding Erectile Issues: Causes and Solutions for Men


Understanding Erectile Issues: Seeking Help for Sexual Performance

Doctor, I would like to ask you a question. When I first start to engage in sexual activity, I get an erection, but when it's time to penetrate, I become soft. Does this mean I have erectile dysfunction? Also, when I am soft, I still experience ejaculation. Please help me re...


Dr. Xu Weikai reply Urology
Hello. To ask in more detail, how long after penetration did it become flaccid? Or did it become flaccid before penetration? The situation you described could potentially be caused by venous insufficiency, which requires special examinations for diagnosis. Generally, erectile dys...

[Read More] Understanding Erectile Issues: Seeking Help for Sexual Performance


Related FAQ