Delayed Ejaculation: Causes and Solutions for Couples - Urology

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We have been married for 10 years.
My husband has an erection during intercourse, but he doesn't feel the urge to ejaculate quickly.
It takes a long time for him to feel the sensation of ejaculation.
However, I notice that when he does ejaculate, it seems to be a painful and forceful process.
Is there something wrong with him? This delayed ejaculation is affecting our sexual relationship.

Miss Hsu, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2009/06/16

Dr. Lin Hexing reply Urology


Dear Ms.
Hsu,
Thank you for your inquiry.
I would like to address your question and provide the following suggestions:
Regarding delayed ejaculation, it is a condition that some individuals may enjoy while others may find undesirable.
It can stem from issues within the relationship, such as a lack of novelty, loss of attraction, relationship tension, or marital stress.
There may also be a physiological aspect related to nerve control of ejaculation.
In foreign countries, there are sexual health specialists available for consultation, but there is a lack of such specialized physicians domestically.
Currently, there are no definitive pharmacological treatments supported by systematic research; most reports are anecdotal or involve a limited number of cases.
In your situation, enhancing and revitalizing the marital relationship may help.
If this does not lead to effective improvement, it would be advisable to seek assistance from a urologist to explore potentially effective medications.
Wishing you peace and happiness!

Reply Date: 2009/06/16

More Info


Delayed ejaculation is a condition where a man has difficulty achieving ejaculation despite adequate sexual stimulation. This can be a source of frustration for both partners and can impact the overall quality of a couple's sexual relationship. Understanding the causes and potential solutions for delayed ejaculation is essential for couples experiencing this issue.


Causes of Delayed Ejaculation
1. Psychological Factors: Stress, anxiety, and depression can significantly affect sexual performance. If your husband is experiencing performance anxiety or is preoccupied with other life stressors, it may hinder his ability to ejaculate. Emotional intimacy and connection are crucial for a fulfilling sexual experience, and any disruption in this can lead to difficulties.

2. Medical Conditions: Certain medical conditions can contribute to delayed ejaculation. These may include diabetes, multiple sclerosis, or hormonal imbalances. Neurological disorders can affect the nerves responsible for ejaculation, leading to delays. Additionally, conditions affecting the prostate or urinary tract can also play a role.

3. Medications: Some medications, particularly antidepressants and blood pressure medications, can have side effects that interfere with sexual function, including delayed ejaculation. If your husband is taking any medications, it might be worth discussing this with his healthcare provider.

4. Substance Use: Alcohol and recreational drugs can impair sexual function. Excessive alcohol consumption can lead to difficulties in achieving ejaculation, as it can dull the nervous system's response.

5. Relationship Issues: Sometimes, unresolved conflicts or lack of communication between partners can lead to sexual dysfunction. If there are underlying issues in the relationship, it may manifest as delayed ejaculation.


Solutions and Recommendations
1. Open Communication: It is vital for both partners to discuss their feelings and concerns openly. Understanding each other's needs and desires can help alleviate anxiety and improve intimacy.

2. Consult a Healthcare Provider: If the issue persists, it is advisable for your husband to consult a healthcare provider or a specialist in sexual health. They can conduct a thorough evaluation to rule out any underlying medical conditions and discuss potential treatment options.

3. Therapy: If psychological factors are contributing to the problem, therapy can be beneficial. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) or sex therapy can help address anxiety, improve communication, and enhance intimacy between partners.

4. Medication Review: If your husband is on any medications, a review with his healthcare provider may be necessary. They can assess whether any current medications could be contributing to the issue and discuss alternatives if needed.

5. Lifestyle Changes: Encouraging a healthy lifestyle can also have a positive impact. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and reducing alcohol consumption can improve overall health and sexual function.

6. Patience and Understanding: It is essential for both partners to be patient and understanding during this time. Sexual intimacy is not solely about ejaculation; focusing on other forms of intimacy can help maintain a strong connection while navigating this challenge.

In conclusion, delayed ejaculation can stem from various factors, including psychological, medical, and relational issues. By fostering open communication, seeking professional help, and exploring potential lifestyle changes, couples can work together to address this concern and enhance their sexual relationship. Remember, sexual health is an integral part of overall well-being, and seeking help is a positive step towards improvement.

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