Delayed Ejaculation: Is It Normal and When to Seek Help? - Urology

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Delayed ejaculation


I have a question.
When I have intercourse with my girlfriend, it often takes a very long time before I feel even a little sensation.
Sometimes, I can thrust for 40 to 50 minutes without feeling the urge to ejaculate.
Is this normal? Should I get checked? I'm really worried.

zero zero, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2012/07/16

Dr. Jiang Yini reply Urology


If there is a long-term issue with delayed ejaculation, it may be necessary to consider a urological examination to check for any neurological influences.

Reply Date: 2012/07/16

More Info


Delayed ejaculation (DE) is a condition where a man has difficulty achieving ejaculation during sexual activity, even with adequate sexual stimulation. It can be a source of concern for many men, especially when it affects their intimate relationships. Understanding whether this condition is normal and when to seek help is crucial for both mental and physical well-being.

Firstly, it’s important to recognize that sexual response varies significantly among individuals. Factors such as age, emotional state, relationship dynamics, and overall health can influence sexual performance. For some men, experiencing delayed ejaculation occasionally may not be a cause for concern. However, if this becomes a consistent issue, it may warrant further investigation.

In your case, you mentioned that you often need to engage in sexual activity for an extended period (4-50 minutes) before feeling any urge to ejaculate. This could be considered delayed ejaculation, especially if it is causing distress or affecting your relationship with your partner. The key factors to consider include:
1. Frequency and Duration: If this has been a consistent pattern over several sexual encounters, it may indicate a problem. Occasional delays might not be alarming, but persistent issues could suggest underlying factors.

2. Emotional and Psychological Factors: Stress, anxiety, and depression can significantly impact sexual function. If you are feeling anxious about your performance or the situation, this could exacerbate the problem. It’s essential to assess your mental state and how it may be influencing your sexual experiences.

3. Physical Health: Various medical conditions, such as diabetes, neurological disorders, or hormonal imbalances, can contribute to delayed ejaculation. Medications, particularly antidepressants, can also have side effects that affect sexual function. If you have any underlying health issues or are taking medications, it may be worth discussing these with a healthcare provider.

4. Relationship Dynamics: The quality of your relationship with your partner can also play a role. Communication about sexual preferences, desires, and any concerns can help alleviate pressure and improve intimacy.

When to seek help? If you find that delayed ejaculation is causing significant distress, affecting your relationship, or if you have concerns about your sexual health, it is advisable to consult a healthcare professional. A doctor can conduct a thorough evaluation, which may include a physical examination, a review of your medical history, and possibly some tests to rule out any underlying conditions.

In terms of treatment, options may vary based on the underlying cause. If psychological factors are at play, therapy or counseling may be beneficial. If there are physical health concerns, addressing those through medical treatment or lifestyle changes may help. Additionally, discussing sexual techniques or exploring different forms of intimacy with your partner can also enhance the experience and reduce anxiety.

In summary, while occasional delays in ejaculation can be normal, persistent issues that cause concern should be addressed. Open communication with your partner and seeking professional advice can lead to better understanding and management of the situation. Remember, sexual health is an integral part of overall well-being, and there is no shame in seeking help when needed.

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