Masturbation is not allowed, and sexual intercourse is also prohibited?
I previously had my girlfriend help me with masturbation, and the first few times I would finish quickly.
However, recently it has taken a long time without ejaculation.
I tried to have intercourse, but I quickly lost my erection, and during sex, I didn't feel much sensation, as if I wasn't receiving any stimulation.
Now, I find that I can't masturbate or have sex, and I feel strange since I don't have any physical discomfort.
What can I do to improve this situation?
John, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2013/09/26
Dr. Lin Hexing reply Urology
Hello: Since you are not yet married, you may have some concerns about premarital sexual activity! This can have a psychological impact and may suppress your sexual performance to some extent.
It seems that your experiences are not always consistent, so there is no need to worry.
There are many other activities you can do with your girlfriend, such as recreational activities, sports, and music appreciation, which can help you both connect on a deeper level and improve your rapport.
This should ultimately be beneficial for your sexual experiences.
Wishing you good health.
Reply Date: 2013/09/26
More Info
Struggling with sexual performance can be a distressing experience, and it’s important to understand that this issue can stem from various factors, both psychological and physiological. Based on your description, it seems that you are experiencing difficulties with arousal and maintaining an erection during sexual activities, which can be frustrating and concerning.
Firstly, it’s essential to recognize that sexual performance can be influenced by a multitude of factors, including stress, anxiety, relationship dynamics, and even lifestyle choices. Performance anxiety is a common issue that many individuals face, especially if there have been previous experiences where performance did not meet expectations. This anxiety can create a cycle where the fear of not performing well leads to difficulties in achieving arousal or maintaining an erection.
In addition to psychological factors, there are also physiological aspects to consider. Hormonal imbalances, particularly low testosterone levels, can affect libido and erectile function. Other medical conditions, such as diabetes, hypertension, or cardiovascular issues, can also contribute to erectile dysfunction. It’s crucial to consult with a healthcare professional, such as a urologist, who can perform a thorough evaluation to rule out any underlying medical conditions that may be affecting your sexual performance.
Lifestyle factors play a significant role in sexual health as well. Poor diet, lack of exercise, smoking, and excessive alcohol consumption can all negatively impact sexual function. Making positive lifestyle changes, such as adopting a healthier diet, engaging in regular physical activity, and reducing stress through mindfulness or relaxation techniques, can improve overall well-being and potentially enhance sexual performance.
Moreover, communication with your partner is vital. Discussing your feelings and experiences openly can help alleviate some of the pressure you may be feeling. A supportive partner can provide reassurance and understanding, which can help reduce anxiety surrounding sexual performance.
If you find that these issues persist despite making lifestyle changes and addressing psychological factors, it may be beneficial to explore therapy options. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can be particularly effective in addressing performance anxiety and other psychological barriers to sexual function. A therapist can help you develop coping strategies and work through any underlying issues that may be contributing to your difficulties.
In summary, struggling with sexual performance can be a complex issue influenced by both psychological and physiological factors. It’s essential to approach this matter holistically, considering lifestyle changes, open communication with your partner, and seeking professional help if necessary. By addressing these areas, you can work towards improving your sexual health and overall well-being. Remember, you are not alone in this experience, and there are resources and support available to help you navigate these challenges.
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