Struggling with Emotional Control: Mental Health Challenges

Unable to resist?

Hello Doctor, I would like to ask about my recent emotional struggles.
I feel like I am losing control over my emotions, and I don’t understand why.
I used to be able to manage them somewhat, but now I find myself thinking that hitting a wall with my fists might help me feel a bit calmer.
My attention span is decreasing, and when I close my eyes, I see scenes that I least want to encounter.
I want to trust others, but I find it hard to do so.
I also don’t like sharing my feelings with anyone.
Every day feels so lonely; even though I have friends around me, I still feel excluded.
It seems like everything I do is in vain, and I will never succeed, as if I am a failure.
I feel exhausted living like this.
Doctor, what is wrong with me?

Mei Dai Dai, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2016/08/07

Dr. Zhong Mingxun reply Psychiatry

Your issue is a significant one, as you struggle to trust others.
Sometimes, it's hard for you to feel the kindness of others, but you become very sensitive when they treat you poorly.
At the same time, you also have difficulty trusting yourself, leading you to feel unaccomplished and futile.
This phenomenon is closely related to your growth experiences, and you are deeply influenced by your past.
I suggest that you seek psychological therapy.

Reply Date: 2016/08/07

More Info

It sounds like you're going through a very challenging time, and I want to acknowledge the feelings you're experiencing. Emotional dysregulation, as you've described, can be a significant source of distress and can impact various aspects of your life, including relationships, work, and overall well-being. Your feelings of isolation, frustration, and hopelessness are important to address, and it's commendable that you're seeking help.

From what you've shared, it seems you may be experiencing symptoms that could be associated with several mental health conditions, including anxiety disorders, depression, or even elements of borderline personality disorder, which can manifest as intense emotional responses and difficulties in relationships. The fact that you're feeling increasingly unable to control your emotions, experiencing intrusive thoughts, and feeling isolated despite having friends around you suggests that you might benefit from professional support.

Here are some insights and strategies that may help you manage your emotions and improve your mental health:
1. Seek Professional Help: It's crucial to talk to a mental health professional who can provide a proper assessment and support. They can help you understand the underlying causes of your emotional struggles and develop a tailored treatment plan. This may include therapy, medication, or a combination of both.

2. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): This is a common therapeutic approach that helps individuals identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviors. CBT can be particularly effective in managing anxiety and depression, helping you to reframe your thoughts and develop healthier coping mechanisms.

3. Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Practicing mindfulness can help you stay grounded in the present moment and reduce feelings of anxiety and emotional overwhelm. Techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga can promote relaxation and emotional regulation.

4. Journaling: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be a powerful way to process your emotions. It can help you identify triggers and patterns in your emotional responses, making it easier to understand and manage them.

5. Physical Activity: Regular exercise has been shown to have a positive impact on mental health. It can help reduce anxiety, improve mood, and increase overall well-being. Even a daily walk can make a significant difference.

6. Social Support: While you may feel isolated, reaching out to friends or family members can help. Sharing your feelings with someone you trust can provide relief and help you feel less alone. If you find it difficult to open up, consider joining a support group where you can connect with others who may be experiencing similar challenges.

7. Limit Substance Use: Alcohol and drugs can exacerbate emotional instability and should be used cautiously. Reducing or eliminating these substances can help improve your mood and emotional control.

8. Establish a Routine: Creating a daily routine can provide structure and a sense of normalcy, which can be comforting during times of emotional turmoil. Include activities that you enjoy and that promote well-being.

9. Self-Compassion: Be gentle with yourself. Recognize that it's okay to feel the way you do and that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. Practicing self-compassion can help reduce feelings of inadequacy and hopelessness.

10. Emergency Support: If you ever feel overwhelmed or have thoughts of self-harm or suicide, it’s crucial to seek immediate help. Contact a mental health professional, call a crisis hotline, or go to the nearest emergency room.

In summary, your feelings of emotional distress are valid, and it's important to take steps toward understanding and managing them. Professional help can provide you with the tools and support you need to navigate this challenging time. Remember, you are not alone, and there is hope for a brighter future.

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