Phimosis: Safe Practices for Intimacy and Comfort - Urology

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Phimosis issue


Hello, doctor.
I have phimosis.
I can pull back the foreskin every day, and when my penis is flaccid, I can retract the foreskin completely.
However, when it is erect, I can only pull it back to just behind the glans, and it feels very tight and painful.
I would like to ask, when I have sexual intercourse with my partner in the future, should I pull the foreskin back completely behind the glans, let the glans be exposed a little, or retract it completely during intercourse?

Niming, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2017/07/26

Dr. Du Shixi reply Urology


Non-medical consultation.
You: If an erection is tight and painful, it is medically advised to seek treatment.
Please visit a urology department at a hospital.
Wishing you good health.

Reply Date: 2017/07/26

More Info


Phimosis, a condition where the foreskin cannot be fully retracted over the glans (the head of the penis), can indeed present challenges when it comes to intimacy and sexual activity. It’s important to approach this topic with care, as comfort and safety are paramount for both partners.

Firstly, it’s crucial to understand that phimosis can vary in severity. In your case, it seems that you can retract the foreskin when the penis is flaccid, but it becomes painful when erect. This is a common experience for many men with phimosis. The pain you feel when trying to retract the foreskin during an erection indicates that you may have a tight band of skin or a condition known as "tight foreskin," which can lead to discomfort during sexual activity.

When it comes to sexual intimacy, here are some safe practices to consider:
1. Communication with Your Partner: Before engaging in sexual activity, it’s essential to have an open conversation with your partner about your condition. Discussing your concerns and limitations can help both of you feel more comfortable and relaxed.

2. Gentle Retraction: If you decide to retract the foreskin during intercourse, do so gently. It may be best to only retract it as far as is comfortable for you. For some men, this means exposing the glans partially rather than fully retracting the foreskin. This can help minimize discomfort while still allowing for intimacy.

3. Use of Lubrication: Adequate lubrication is key to reducing friction and discomfort during intercourse. Water-based or silicone-based lubricants can help make the experience more comfortable. Avoid oil-based lubricants, as they can degrade latex condoms if you are using them for protection.

4. Experiment with Positions: Different sexual positions may allow for more comfort and less strain on the foreskin. You and your partner can explore various positions to find what feels best for both of you.

5. Listen to Your Body: Pay attention to your body’s signals. If you experience pain or discomfort, it’s important to stop and reassess. Pushing through pain can lead to further complications or injury.

6. Consider Medical Advice: If you find that phimosis is causing significant discomfort or affecting your sexual life, it may be worth consulting a healthcare professional. They can provide guidance on potential treatments, which may include topical steroids to help loosen the foreskin, or in some cases, surgical options like circumcision.

7. Gradual Desensitization: If you are concerned about discomfort, you might consider gradually desensitizing the area by practicing gentle retraction and exposure over time, allowing your body to adjust to the sensation.

8. Avoid Forcing Retraction: It’s important not to force the foreskin back if it causes pain. Forcing it can lead to tearing, bleeding, or scarring, which can worsen the condition.

In conclusion, managing phimosis during intimacy requires a combination of communication, comfort, and care. By taking these steps, you can create a more enjoyable and safe experience for both you and your partner. If you have ongoing concerns or if the condition worsens, seeking medical advice is always a prudent step. Remember, sexual health is an important aspect of overall well-being, and addressing any issues with a healthcare provider can lead to better outcomes.

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