I am not sure if I have any mental health disorders?
I'm sorry to bother you.
I am a high school sophomore, and I have been troubled by some issues that make those around me wonder if I might have a mental illness.
Since the fifth or sixth grade, I have had a subconscious habit of pulling my hair, to the point where a barber once noticed bald patches on my scalp.
I still continue to pull my hair, and sometimes when I realize it, I can see a pile of black hair on the floor.
I wonder if this could be a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder.
In the first year of middle school, I began to self-harm using sharp objects like utility knives, leaving about thirty scars on each of my arms.
I have even attempted to jump off a building.
Although there has been some improvement in high school, I still frequently have thoughts of wanting to self-harm or commit suicide, which I have to suppress to avoid acting on them.
I am unsure if I might have depression or a similar condition.
Recently, I have started to suddenly scream while holding my head (like a hoarse shout).
I even find myself hitting my head or the back of my skull without realizing it, only coming to my senses when I feel pain.
I also sometimes say meaningless short phrases, such as "I'm so hungry" or "That's strange," which I never used to do.
I was once called in for a counseling session in middle school, but it didn't seem to help.
A teacher in vocational school, who seems to have studied color psychology, looked at my work and suggested that I might have a dual personality, which I found to be quite fitting based on my research.
However, my parents have always prevented me from seeing a doctor, so I am here to seek advice.
Niming, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2017/09/09
Dr. Song Chengxian reply Psychiatry
Hello: Emotional and behavioral difficulties can benefit from the assistance of professionals.
Based on your description, it is advisable to visit a professional medical institution to discuss your situation in detail with a qualified expert, which will help you better understand your condition and address the issues you are facing.
Regarding parental consent, since you are considered a minor, it is indeed recommended that you have your parents accompany you and provide informed consent.
It would be beneficial to communicate your needs to your parents, and if necessary, you can also utilize the academic support resources available within your school.
Reply Date: 2017/09/09
More Info
It sounds like you are going through a very challenging time, and I want to commend you for reaching out and seeking help. The symptoms you describe, such as hair pulling (trichotillomania), self-harm, suicidal thoughts, and sudden outbursts, are serious and indicate that you may be dealing with underlying mental health issues that require professional attention.
Firstly, it's important to understand that mental health disorders, including anxiety, depression, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), can manifest in various ways. The behaviors you mentioned, such as pulling your hair and self-harming, are often coping mechanisms for dealing with emotional distress. They can provide temporary relief from overwhelming feelings, but they ultimately lead to more pain and suffering. The fact that you have thoughts of self-harm and suicide is particularly concerning and should not be taken lightly.
You mentioned that you have experienced these issues since elementary school, and while there may have been some improvement, the persistence of these thoughts and behaviors suggests that they are deeply rooted and may require more intensive intervention. It's also worth noting that the sudden outbursts, such as screaming or hitting your head, could be a sign of emotional dysregulation, which is often seen in individuals who struggle with anxiety and depression.
Regarding your concern about being diagnosed with a mental health disorder, it's crucial to remember that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. A mental health professional can provide you with a proper assessment and diagnosis, which can help you understand what you are experiencing. They can also work with you to develop coping strategies and treatment plans tailored to your needs. Treatment options may include therapy, medication, or a combination of both, depending on the severity of your symptoms.
It's understandable that you feel hesitant to seek help, especially if your parents are not supportive. However, your mental health is paramount, and it is essential to advocate for yourself. If you feel comfortable, consider discussing your feelings with a trusted adult, such as a teacher, school counselor, or another family member who may be more understanding. They can help you navigate the process of seeking help and may even be able to assist you in talking to your parents about the importance of mental health care.
In the meantime, there are some self-help strategies you can try to manage your symptoms. Practicing mindfulness and grounding techniques can help you stay present and reduce anxiety. Journaling your thoughts and feelings can also be a helpful outlet for expressing what you are going through. Engaging in creative activities, such as drawing or writing, can provide a constructive way to channel your emotions.
Lastly, remember that you are not alone in this journey. Many people experience mental health challenges, and there is a community of support available to you. Online resources, hotlines, and support groups can provide additional assistance and connection with others who understand what you are going through.
In conclusion, I encourage you to seek professional help as soon as possible. Your mental health is important, and there are people who want to help you navigate these challenges. You deserve to feel better and to live a fulfilling life. Please take care of yourself, and remember that reaching out for help is a courageous step towards healing.
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