Dissociative Identity Disorder: Seeking Help for Complex Symptoms

What should I do?

Hello, Doctor.
I apologize for the lengthy content, but I believe it's difficult to describe my symptoms without starting from the beginning.
In the second year of junior high, I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder caused by post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Initially, my symptoms included inexplicable sadness, auditory hallucinations, and self-harm.
During PTSD episodes, images would involuntarily flash in my mind, and I would become completely engulfed in fear, trembling and hyperventilating.
However, I don't know when it started, but it seems that the auditory hallucinations transformed from mere sounds into a person.
This condition of being dominated by the hallucination has been intermittent, fluctuating between better and worse states, and during severe episodes, I even forget what I have done.
Yet, when I feel better, it's as if nothing is wrong.
Ultimately, my family could no longer tolerate it.
They chose not to believe what I said; regardless of whether I claimed it was me, they thought I was just talking nonsense.
So, I continued to live like this.
Recently, however, these symptoms have intensified.
At times, I feel as if I am detached from my body, and my thoughts become violent and bloody, completely unlike myself.
If it weren't for the wounds I inflicted on myself, I would think it was all a dream.
I often cannot distinguish between dreams and reality; I only realize some events were dreams after discussing them with friends.
Even when friends mention things that happened a couple of days ago, I often wonder if that really happened or if it was just a dream.
Time seems to be passing more quickly, and I am starting to feel a lack of reality.
Friends have also commented that I seem strange, but I cannot explain it to them.
My friends and I have been suspecting that I might have dissociative identity disorder because I do not have any exaggerated delusions or hallucinations.
However, every time I tell my doctor about my experiences, he just reassures me that these feelings will pass and that it’s just a phase.
He gives me the impression that he does not believe anything I say, so I stopped seeing him and only have my family help me with medication.
Recently, while studying psychology, I discovered that dissociative identity disorder closely aligns with my symptoms.
I would like to ask what the definition is.
Do I fall under dissociative identity disorder? What should I do now? I am very afraid that one day I might hurt someone, but I am already tired of explaining everything to my family and doctor.
Thank you very much for taking the time to read this.

Tian, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2018/11/03

Dr. Wu Enliang reply Psychiatry

This dissociative condition reflects some subconscious conflicts and typically cannot be treated with medication alone.
It is essential to incorporate psychotherapy.
It is recommended to arrange for individual therapy with a physician.
If financially feasible, seeking services from a private counseling center is preferable.
If finances are a concern, it is advisable to utilize counseling resources available at schools or the free mental health treatment services provided by municipal mental health centers.
Wishing you a speedy recovery, Wu Enliang.

Reply Date: 2018/11/03

More Info

Understanding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) and the complexities surrounding it can be quite challenging, especially when one is experiencing symptoms that significantly impact daily life. Based on your description, it seems you are grappling with a range of distressing symptoms that may align with DID or other dissociative disorders.
Dissociative Identity Disorder, previously known as Multiple Personality Disorder, is characterized by the presence of two or more distinct personality states or an experience of possession. These distinct identities may have their own names, ages, histories, and characteristics. Individuals with DID often experience gaps in memory regarding everyday events, personal information, and traumatic events, which can lead to significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning.

Your experiences of hearing voices, feeling detached from your body, and having difficulty distinguishing between dreams and reality are indicative of dissociative symptoms. The fact that you have a history of trauma, specifically post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), further complicates your situation, as trauma is a common precursor to dissociative disorders. The dissociation serves as a coping mechanism, allowing individuals to distance themselves from the emotional pain associated with traumatic experiences.

It is concerning that your symptoms have intensified and that you feel your family is not supportive or understanding of your situation. This lack of validation can exacerbate feelings of isolation and distress. It is crucial to find a mental health professional who is knowledgeable about dissociative disorders and trauma-informed care. A therapist who specializes in trauma and dissociation can provide you with a safe space to explore your experiences and develop coping strategies.

In terms of seeking help, here are some steps you can consider:
1. Find a Specialist: Look for a mental health professional who specializes in dissociative disorders or trauma. They can provide a comprehensive assessment and help you understand your symptoms better.

2. Therapeutic Approaches: Consider therapies that are effective for dissociative disorders, such as Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), or trauma-focused cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). These approaches can help you process traumatic memories and develop healthier coping mechanisms.

3. Support Groups: Connecting with others who have similar experiences can be incredibly validating. Support groups for individuals with dissociative disorders can provide a sense of community and understanding.

4. Educate Yourself: Understanding your symptoms and the nature of dissociative disorders can empower you. There are many resources available, including books, articles, and reputable websites that discuss DID and related conditions.

5. Communicate with Family: While it may be challenging, consider discussing your experiences with your family when you feel ready. Educating them about your condition may help them understand your struggles better, although it is essential to prioritize your well-being.

6. Crisis Planning: If you ever feel like you might harm yourself or others, it is crucial to seek immediate help. Create a crisis plan that includes emergency contacts, coping strategies, and resources for immediate support.

Your fear of potentially harming others is valid and highlights the importance of seeking professional help. A mental health professional can work with you to develop strategies to manage these feelings and ensure your safety and the safety of those around you.

In conclusion, while navigating the complexities of dissociative symptoms can be daunting, it is essential to seek help from professionals who understand these conditions. You are not alone in this journey, and there are resources and support available to help you find clarity and healing. Remember, taking the first step to seek help is a significant move towards understanding and managing your experiences.

Similar Q&A

Understanding Dissociative Identity Disorder: Symptoms and When to Seek Help

I can feel that there are different "selves" within me. They don't have their own names, but I can clearly understand their roles and distinct personalities. I can hear their conversations and talk to them, but sometimes I can't intervene; it seems they are di...

Dr. Wang Yazhen reply Psychiatry
Dear 巴子, Based on what you have described, it seems somewhat similar to "derealization disorder," which involves a feeling of detachment from the present moment and a sense of being an observer of oneself. However, since dissociative symptoms can vary widely, there ma...

Can Dissociative Identity Disorder Be Treated Effectively?

Can dissociative identity disorder be treated?

Dr. Zhang Zhehong reply Psychiatry
Actually, dissociative identity disorder is very rare! Can you tell me the specific issues that are troubling you? For example: insomnia, emotional instability, interpersonal difficulties, auditory sensitivity, or feeling like someone is out to get you.

Understanding Dissociative Identity Disorder: Origins and Insights

What is multiple personality disorder? When did it originate?

Dr. Zhang Zhehong reply Psychiatry
Actually, dissociative identity disorder is very rare! Can you tell me about the specific issues that are troubling you? For example: insomnia, emotional dysregulation, interpersonal difficulties, auditory sensitivity, or feeling like someone is out to get you.

Understanding Dissociative Identity Disorder: Symptoms and Treatment Options

What constitutes dissociative identity disorder (formerly known as multiple personality disorder)? How can it be treated or managed?

Dr. Kong Fanzhong reply Psychiatry
The characteristics of dissociative identity disorder (formerly known as multiple personality disorder) include the presence of two or more distinct identities or personality states within an individual, which recurrently control the person's behavior, along with an inabilit...