Painful Intercourse: Causes and Solutions for Women - Obstetrics and Gynecology

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Dyspareunia


Hello, I would like to ask about my experience after getting married.
I have been unable to successfully have intercourse with my husband, as it has been too painful each time, leading us to give up.
I have successfully inserted fingers and tampons without pain, but when I try using a lot of lubricant and a vibrator, or when my husband attempts to penetrate, I feel like there is a barrier, and pushing harder results in significant pain and even bleeding.
My friends say that losing virginity shouldn't be very painful.
Could this be a case of vaginismus or a thick hymen? Thank you!

DoReMi, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2020/05/29

Dr. Zhang Kunmin reply Obstetrics and Gynecology


Hello, based on your description, it is difficult to determine the exact cause.
If your symptoms persist, I recommend that you consult a physician for evaluation.
Thank you! Wishing you safety and good health.
Dr.
Chang

Reply Date: 2020/05/29

More Info


Painful intercourse, or dyspareunia, is a common issue that many women face, and it can stem from a variety of causes. In your case, it seems that you are experiencing significant discomfort during attempts at penetration, which could be attributed to several factors, including anatomical, psychological, or physiological issues.

One potential cause of your pain could be vaginismus, a condition characterized by involuntary muscle contractions in the pelvic floor muscles, which can make penetration painful or even impossible. This condition is often linked to anxiety, fear, or past traumatic experiences related to sexual activity. The fact that you can insert fingers or a tampon without pain suggests that the issue may not solely be anatomical but could also involve psychological components. It’s essential to address any fears or anxieties you may have about penetration, as these can exacerbate the physical symptoms.

Another possibility is that your hymen may be thicker or less elastic than average, which can cause discomfort during penetration. The hymen is a thin membrane that partially covers the vaginal opening, and in some women, it can be more rigid, leading to pain during first attempts at intercourse. However, it’s important to note that the hymen can stretch or tear during various activities, not just sexual intercourse, and some women may not experience significant pain or bleeding when this occurs.

Additionally, insufficient lubrication can contribute to painful intercourse. While you mentioned using a lot of lubricant, it’s crucial to ensure that the lubricant is appropriate for vaginal use and that you are adequately aroused before attempting penetration. Sometimes, anxiety about pain can lead to decreased arousal, which can further reduce natural lubrication and increase discomfort.

Given your experience of bleeding during attempts at penetration, it’s advisable to consult with a healthcare provider, preferably a gynecologist, who can perform a thorough examination. They can assess for any anatomical abnormalities, such as a thick hymen or other structural issues, and rule out any underlying medical conditions that could be contributing to your pain, such as infections or inflammation.

In terms of solutions, here are some steps you might consider:
1. Education and Communication: Openly discuss your concerns and experiences with your partner. Understanding each other’s feelings can help reduce anxiety and create a more supportive environment.

2. Relaxation Techniques: Engage in relaxation exercises, such as deep breathing or pelvic floor relaxation techniques, to help ease tension in your body before attempting penetration.

3. Gradual Desensitization: Consider using smaller objects for penetration, such as fingers or smaller toys, to gradually acclimate your body to the sensation of penetration without causing pain.

4. Professional Guidance: A sex therapist or pelvic floor physical therapist can provide specialized guidance and exercises to help address vaginismus or other pelvic floor issues.

5. Medical Evaluation: As mentioned, a thorough evaluation by a healthcare provider is essential to rule out any physical causes of your pain. They may suggest treatments or interventions based on their findings.

In conclusion, painful intercourse can be a complex issue with various contributing factors. It’s essential to approach this matter holistically, considering both physical and emotional aspects. Seeking professional help can provide you with the support and solutions you need to improve your sexual health and overall well-being.

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