Anxiety from Compulsive Thoughts and Coincidences

Obsessive thinking about coincidences leads to feelings of anxiety?

Hello, Dr.
Lin.
I apologize for the length of my message.
Recently, I've started to fear whether I truly have the ability to foresee events due to various coincidences in my life.
For instance, I suddenly think of a disturbing image, and then the dialogue on the television happens to relate to what I was thinking (this has occurred twice recently).
Or, I revisited a certain film or show, and then the people around me also started watching it, or I see it everywhere online, which makes these coincidences feel quite unsettling.

I know rationally that these are just coincidences, and if I didn't engage in compulsive thinking, I wouldn't pay much attention to these occurrences.
In fact, I might even think how impressive my intuition is (I used to feel that way).
I try to comfort myself with rational thoughts, but it doesn't always work.
When new coincidences happen, the feelings of worry and anxiety resurface.

I've come to realize that my anxiety stems from my previous experiences with obsessive-compulsive disorder, where I would have intrusive thoughts about someone facing negative outcomes, which is not something I desire.
Yet, these thoughts still occur.
To alleviate my anxiety, I try to reassure myself that the things I think about won't happen.
However, when I think of the coincidences mentioned above, I start to fear that I might actually possess some sort of predictive ability, and that those I have mentally cursed might face misfortune.

Having intrusive thoughts doesn't lead to actual events, right...? Those coincidences must just be random occurrences; everyone experiences them, right...? Currently, the way I cope with my anxiety is by telling myself that the things I think about won't happen (allowing myself to think freely without consequence), that people don't have predictive abilities—am I a wizard? (so that I won't fear coincidences).
But I know all these truths; it just feels more effective when someone else says them to me.
😂 Thank you, Doctor.

P, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2021/01/26

Dr. Lin Mianzhang reply Psychiatry

Hi there! Thank you for your hard work! Many obsessive thoughts are like this; you clearly know that these thoughts are irrational, yet you can't resist thinking about them.
Often, when others tell you how things should be, you might not be able to accept it.
However, since you've made this request, let me reiterate: "The things you encounter are mere coincidences; you are not a deity and do not possess the ability to foresee events, and the thoughts in your mind absolutely cannot influence others." I hope this helps you :) Of course, if you still have concerns in this area, I recommend seeking help from a psychiatrist.
Wishing you a speedy recovery.

Reply Date: 2021/01/26

More Info

It sounds like you are experiencing a significant amount of anxiety related to compulsive thoughts and coincidences, which can be quite distressing. Your concerns about having some sort of predictive ability due to these coincidences are not uncommon among individuals who struggle with anxiety and obsessive-compulsive tendencies. Let's explore this further.

Firstly, it’s important to understand that what you are experiencing is a common manifestation of anxiety disorders, particularly obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). In OCD, individuals often have intrusive thoughts (obsessions) that lead to compulsive behaviors or mental rituals aimed at reducing anxiety. In your case, the compulsive thoughts seem to revolve around the fear of having predictive abilities or causing harm through your thoughts, which is a form of magical thinking often seen in OCD.

The coincidences you mentioned—such as thinking of something and then seeing it reflected in your environment—can be unsettling. However, these occurrences are typically just that: coincidences. Our brains are wired to seek patterns and connections, which can sometimes lead us to perceive links where none exist. This cognitive bias is known as "apophenia," the tendency to see meaningful connections in random data.
Your rational mind recognizes that these coincidences are not indicative of any special ability, yet the emotional response can be overwhelming. This disconnect between rational thought and emotional reaction is a hallmark of anxiety. It’s crucial to acknowledge that while you may understand these thoughts logically, the emotional weight they carry can still provoke significant anxiety.

To manage this anxiety, consider the following strategies:
1. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): This is a highly effective treatment for anxiety and OCD. CBT helps you challenge and reframe irrational thoughts and beliefs. A therapist can guide you through exposure and response prevention (ERP), a specific type of CBT that involves gradually exposing you to your fears while preventing the compulsive response.

2. Mindfulness and Acceptance: Practicing mindfulness can help you observe your thoughts without judgment. Techniques such as meditation can allow you to acknowledge your thoughts as just thoughts, rather than truths that require action or fear. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) can also be beneficial, as it encourages you to accept your thoughts and feelings rather than fight against them.

3. Journaling: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can help you process them. It can also serve as a tool to track your anxiety triggers and patterns, allowing you to see how often these coincidences occur and how they relate to your emotional state.

4. Limit Information Seeking: If you find yourself constantly checking or seeking reassurance about your thoughts, try to limit this behavior. Set boundaries for how much time you spend researching or ruminating on these coincidences.

5. Medication: If your anxiety is significantly impacting your daily life, consider discussing medication options with a psychiatrist. Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) are commonly prescribed for OCD and anxiety disorders.

6. Support Groups: Connecting with others who experience similar thoughts can provide comfort and reduce feelings of isolation. Sharing your experiences can help normalize your feelings and provide new coping strategies.

7. Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself. Recognize that anxiety is a challenging experience, and it’s okay to seek help. Remind yourself that having these thoughts does not define you or your abilities.

In conclusion, while it’s understandable to feel anxious about coincidences and intrusive thoughts, it’s essential to approach these feelings with a combination of rational understanding and therapeutic strategies. Remember, you are not alone in this experience, and seeking professional help can provide you with the tools you need to manage your anxiety effectively.

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