My Mental Health Struggles: Seeking Answers and Hope

Q: My Mental Health Struggles: Seeking Answers and Hope

Hello： If you want to understand what illness you have, it's difficult to make a complete assessment from the letter. <br>It seems that there is definitely an element of depression, but whether there are other issues should be determined by a professional physician. <br>I recomme

What disease is it?

I experienced a long period during my illness where I felt that my classmates and friends were excluding me, which often led me to hide alone in my dorm room and cry.
Sometimes, even an offhand comment or a glance from someone would make me feel sad.
I struggled to find the motivation to attend classes and even had thoughts of wanting to die.
I felt that many things were not going my way and believed I hadn't done anything wrong, yet there were many distressing situations that made me unhappy.
I would see people and not greet them, experienced insomnia at night, but during the day, I would sleep in late.
At home, I would occasionally hide under the covers and cry.
Eventually, my roommate and family noticed my unusual behavior and took me to the emergency department at the city hospital (since it was a Sunday and outpatient clinics were closed).
On the day of the consultation, I experienced brief auditory hallucinations (which lasted only a few minutes during the appointment) but they did not recur afterward.
However, I seemed to have some delusions as well, writing strange phrases on paper (but this only lasted a few days).
I am unsure about what illness I have.
The doctor I am currently seeing believes that the medication I was previously taking, Olanzapine, is typically prescribed for schizophrenia patients, and he thinks I have more of a tendency toward depression.
Therefore, he suggested changing my medication, as he believes Olanzapine has significant side effects.
However, I am very afraid of a relapse.
I am willing to take medication for life, but I do not want to relapse because I truly want to live happily.

Xiao Yu, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2003/03/20

Dr. Lin Yanhong reply Psychiatry

Hello: If you want to understand what illness you have, it's difficult to make a complete assessment from the letter.
It seems that there is definitely an element of depression, but whether there are other issues should be determined by a professional physician.
I recommend that you continue to attend follow-up appointments and discuss any concerns with your doctor.
Once the issues are clearly identified and treated over the long term, the chances of recurrence will be minimal.
Wishing you all the best.
Dr.
Lin

Reply Date: 2003/03/20

More Info

It sounds like you are going through an incredibly challenging time, and I want to acknowledge the pain and confusion you are experiencing. Mental health struggles can be overwhelming, and it's important to understand that you are not alone in this journey. Many people face similar feelings of isolation, sadness, and anxiety, and seeking help is a crucial step toward healing.

From what you've described, it seems that you are dealing with a combination of symptoms that may include depression, anxiety, and possibly some elements of psychosis, such as hallucinations or delusions. These experiences can be deeply distressing and can significantly impact your daily life, relationships, and overall well-being. It's understandable to feel scared about the possibility of a mental health diagnosis, but it's essential to remember that a diagnosis is not a label; rather, it is a way for healthcare professionals to understand your experiences and guide you toward appropriate treatment.

Your feelings of being excluded or ostracized by peers, along with the emotional pain that follows, can be indicative of social anxiety or depression. The fact that you find yourself withdrawing from social interactions and experiencing intense sadness is a sign that you may benefit from professional support. It's also concerning that you have had thoughts of self-harm or suicide. If you ever feel that you are in immediate danger or have thoughts of harming yourself, please reach out for help immediately. You can contact a crisis hotline or go to the nearest emergency room.

Regarding your medication, it's crucial to have open and honest communication with your psychiatrist about your concerns and experiences. If your current medication is causing side effects or if you feel it is not addressing your symptoms effectively, discussing alternatives with your doctor is a valid approach. Many people with depression or anxiety find that it takes time to find the right medication or combination of treatments that work for them. Your desire to avoid relapse is understandable, and a good psychiatrist will work with you to find a treatment plan that minimizes risks while maximizing benefits.

In addition to medication, therapy can be an invaluable resource. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and other therapeutic modalities can help you develop coping strategies, challenge negative thought patterns, and improve your emotional regulation. Therapy can also provide a safe space for you to express your feelings and experiences without judgment.

It's also important to engage in self-care practices that promote mental well-being. This can include regular physical activity, maintaining a balanced diet, practicing mindfulness or meditation, and ensuring you have a support system in place, whether through friends, family, or support groups. Connecting with others who understand what you're going through can help alleviate feelings of isolation.

Lastly, remember that recovery is a journey, and it's okay to take it one step at a time. Celebrate small victories, and be gentle with yourself as you navigate this process. Seeking help is a sign of strength, and with the right support and treatment, it is possible to find joy and fulfillment in life again. Please continue to reach out for help, whether through mental health professionals or supportive friends and family. You deserve to feel better and to live a life that brings you happiness.

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