Struggling with Overthinking: Finding Motivation and Connection - Psychiatry

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I am unsure how to address the issue?


I often find myself lost in thought, reflecting on past events, and sometimes I zone out while thinking.
Occasionally, I try to reconnect with people I know on Facebook, but they often feel there's no need to communicate, which can be bothersome for them.
This sometimes leads to a lack of motivation in my life, making me prone to daydreaming.
I'm unsure about what I should do.

Huang, 40~49 year old female. Ask Date: 2022/04/27

Dr. Wang Yaoting reply Psychiatry


Hello: Based on your description, it seems that you lack motivation in life and interpersonal relationships, and often dwell on the past.
I suggest making some changes in your life and forcing yourself to take action.
In fact, motivation typically arises after you begin to take action, rather than before you start.
There is a common misconception that motivation precedes action, but the reality is that motivation is often a result of action, not the cause of it.
Once you start taking action, even if it's very small, it will naturally generate motivation in your life.
If there is no improvement over time, it may be beneficial to seek evaluation at a mental health clinic for possible medication or psychotherapy, both of which can be effective.

Reply Date: 2022/04/27

More Info


Struggling with overthinking and finding motivation can be a challenging experience, and it’s important to understand that you are not alone in this. Many individuals face similar issues, often stemming from anxiety, past experiences, or a lack of direction in their lives. The good news is that there are effective strategies to help you regain control over your thoughts and find motivation.

Firstly, it’s essential to recognize the nature of overthinking. Overthinking often involves ruminating on past events or worrying excessively about future scenarios. This can lead to a cycle of negative thoughts that drain your energy and motivation. One effective approach to combat overthinking is to practice mindfulness. Mindfulness involves being present in the moment and observing your thoughts without judgment. Techniques such as meditation, deep breathing exercises, or even simple grounding exercises can help you become more aware of your thoughts and reduce their overwhelming nature.

Another strategy is to set small, achievable goals for yourself. When you feel overwhelmed, it can be helpful to break down your tasks into manageable steps. For instance, if you find yourself lost in thought, try to redirect your focus to a specific task, no matter how small. This could be as simple as organizing your workspace, going for a short walk, or even writing down your thoughts in a journal. The act of taking action, even in small ways, can create a sense of accomplishment and motivate you to continue moving forward.

Additionally, consider the importance of social connections in your life. It seems that you may be reaching out to others, but feeling that your attempts are not reciprocated. This can be disheartening, but it’s crucial to remember that not everyone may be in a position to engage deeply at all times. Instead of focusing solely on those who may not respond, try to cultivate relationships with individuals who share your interests or values. Engaging in activities or groups that align with your passions can help you meet like-minded people and foster meaningful connections.

It’s also worth exploring the underlying reasons for your overthinking. Sometimes, our thoughts are influenced by past experiences or fears of judgment from others. Reflecting on these patterns can provide insight into why you may feel compelled to overthink or seek validation from others. Consider discussing these feelings with a mental health professional, who can help you navigate these thoughts and develop healthier coping mechanisms.

Lastly, remember that motivation often follows action. If you find yourself lacking motivation, try to engage in activities that you once enjoyed or explore new hobbies. Even if you don’t feel like it at first, taking that initial step can lead to a renewed sense of purpose and energy.
In summary, overcoming overthinking and finding motivation is a journey that requires patience and self-compassion. By practicing mindfulness, setting small goals, nurturing social connections, reflecting on underlying fears, and taking action, you can gradually regain control over your thoughts and find the motivation you seek. If these strategies do not lead to improvement, consider seeking professional help, as a therapist can provide tailored support and guidance to help you navigate these challenges effectively. Remember, it’s okay to ask for help, and taking that step can be a significant part of your healing journey.

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