What is wrong with me?!
Hello, doctor: I recently started a new relationship, but I've noticed that I have become unusually anxious and insecure.
I've had a few failed relationships in the past, and I really dislike this version of myself.
Lately, I've been experiencing extreme emotional fluctuations; when I'm angry, I become inexplicably agitated and often lose control, shouting uncontrollably, which I never used to do.
Yet, I can't seem to stop myself.
I also find myself crying for no reason, with tears flowing continuously.
I often doubt my worth in this world.
Sitting by the lake, I sometimes feel that if I jumped in, everything would be calm.
I don't know what's happening to me.
I truly feel like I'm losing control over my emotions more and more.
Compared to before, I feel completely devoid of confidence.
Nothing seems to go well, and I can't do anything right.
What is wrong with me?! What should I do?! Please help me...
Wuzhuzhe, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2003/10/17
Dr. Chen Wenke reply Psychiatry
Hello: Based on your description, depression should be the primary consideration.
Life stressors and interpersonal pressures can lead to feelings of sadness, anxiety, and emotional lows.
This can result in a cascade of negative emotions and thoughts.
Many people experience similar situations every day.
If these feelings persist, it is important to seek help from a professional psychiatrist.
Do not be afraid to seek medical attention; it can be beneficial.
Reply Date: 2003/10/17
More Info
It sounds like you are experiencing a significant emotional upheaval, which can be incredibly distressing. The feelings of anxiety, anger, sadness, and self-doubt that you describe are common symptoms of various mental health conditions, including anxiety disorders, depression, and possibly even borderline personality disorder. The fact that you have a history of relationship difficulties and are currently feeling particularly vulnerable in a new relationship may be exacerbating these feelings.
Firstly, it's important to acknowledge that seeking help is a crucial step in managing your emotional turmoil. Many people struggle with similar feelings, and it's okay to reach out for support. You mentioned feeling out of control, which can be frightening. This loss of control over your emotions can lead to impulsive actions, such as yelling or crying unexpectedly, and can create a cycle of shame and frustration. Understanding that these reactions are part of a larger emotional struggle can help you approach them with compassion rather than judgment.
Your feelings of worthlessness and thoughts of jumping into the lake are serious and should not be taken lightly. These thoughts can be indicative of severe depression or suicidal ideation, which require immediate attention. If you ever feel that you might act on these thoughts, please seek help right away—whether from a trusted friend, family member, or a mental health professional.
Here are some steps you can take to begin addressing your emotional struggles:
1. Seek Professional Help: A mental health professional can provide you with a safe space to explore your feelings and develop coping strategies. Therapy, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), can be particularly effective in helping you understand and manage your emotions.
2. Practice Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Mindfulness practices, such as meditation or deep breathing exercises, can help ground you in the present moment and reduce feelings of anxiety and overwhelm. These techniques can also help you become more aware of your emotional triggers and responses.
3. Journaling: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be a therapeutic way to process your emotions. It can help you identify patterns in your emotional responses and provide clarity on what might be triggering your feelings of inadequacy or anger.
4. Build a Support Network: Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who can listen and provide encouragement. Sharing your feelings with others can help alleviate the burden of isolation.
5. Engage in Physical Activity: Regular exercise can significantly improve your mood and reduce anxiety. Physical activity releases endorphins, which are natural mood lifters.
6. Limit Negative Influences: If certain situations or people contribute to your feelings of inadequacy or anger, consider setting boundaries to protect your emotional well-being.
7. Educate Yourself: Understanding more about mental health can empower you. Reading books or articles about emotional regulation, anxiety, and depression can provide insights and coping strategies.
8. Establish a Routine: Creating a daily routine can provide structure and a sense of normalcy, which can be comforting during times of emotional distress.
Remember, you are not alone in this struggle, and there is help available. It’s commendable that you are reaching out and seeking answers. Taking the first step towards understanding and managing your emotions is crucial, and with the right support and strategies, you can work towards feeling more in control and confident in yourself. Please consider reaching out to a mental health professional who can guide you through this challenging time.
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