Thank you?
First of all, thank you, doctor, for your response.
Last time, I wasn't speaking irrationally; what I meant to express is that my uncle usually behaves normally and does household chores.
Occasionally, he helps out during religious activities, and he seems fine, not like someone with a mental illness who just speaks nonsensically.
However, he tends to think of unrealistic things, which leaves us feeling helpless.
For instance, he claims that my father acted as a matchmaker for him, and the girl he mentioned is just a high school student.
Doctor, if I may ask you a question: if you had an older brother who is nearly fifty and unmarried, and you wanted to help him, what age range would you consider for a potential match? Wouldn't it be someone closer in age? Moreover, we have never even met this girl, and given his situation, we are hesitant to assist him.
Recently, he also claimed that we returned money owed to someone else (the debt he mentioned previously) to this girl’s family, and after they received it, they breached the agreement and didn’t return the money, so now we are expected to pay him back.
He also said that my mother, when she received the money, mentioned wanting to keep it for groceries.
Sigh, these are all things he rambles about at night while we’re next door, because as soon as we leave in the evening, he waits at home for us to return, and then he starts talking about all sorts of things.
We can only sleep when he sleeps.
I feel a sense of pressure when we come back home.
A few weeks ago, he claimed that one of his friends won the lottery and was supposed to share some of the winnings with him, but he believes we kept it all for ourselves.
It’s really frustrating.
I apologize for sharing so much, and thank you for reading.
A-Ming, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2004/04/28
Dr. Chen Wenyu reply Psychiatry
Hello Amin: His thoughts are not based on reality, right? They are all his own inventions.
Why does he think this way? Perhaps he saw that girl, and she glanced at him, leading him to delusionally believe that she wants to marry him.
When he sees others winning the lottery, he thinks that their winnings are also due to his influence, so they should share it with him; this is a form of relational delusion.
He may believe that you are intentionally not helping him and are taking advantage of him, or even plotting against him, which indicates persecutory delusions.
You may notice that the content and targets of his delusions are all related to your family.
When a person feels severely oppressed or victimized, there are three possible reactions: 1.
continue to endure, 2.
leave, or 3.
take preemptive action.
If the third option is not addressed promptly (with psychiatric intervention), it can easily make headlines in social news.
Additionally, individuals with mental illness often have disrupted sleep patterns, staying awake at night and sleeping during the day.
They may talk to themselves and exhibit high levels of suspicion, which could indicate auditory hallucinations.
It is possible that the delusional content mentioned above is being communicated to him through these hallucinations, which can follow him 24/7, akin to brainwashing; he cannot dismiss them.
Therefore, prompt treatment is necessary.
Thank you for your letter!
Reply Date: 2004/04/28
More Info
Dealing with unusual thoughts and behaviors in family members can be incredibly challenging, especially when those thoughts seem disconnected from reality. From your description, it appears that your uncle is experiencing delusions, which are false beliefs that are firmly held despite evidence to the contrary. This can be a symptom of various mental health conditions, including schizophrenia or delusional disorder. Understanding these issues is crucial for both the individual experiencing them and their family members.
Firstly, it's important to recognize that mental health conditions can manifest in many ways. Your uncle may seem normal during certain activities, like cleaning or participating in community events, but his unusual thoughts indicate that he may be struggling with a deeper issue. Delusions can often lead to significant distress for both the individual and their loved ones, as they can create misunderstandings and conflicts within the family.
To address your concerns, here are some strategies that may help:
1. Open Communication: It’s essential to maintain open lines of communication with your uncle. While it can be frustrating to hear his unfounded claims, responding with empathy rather than confrontation can help. Try to listen to his concerns without judgment, which may help him feel understood and less defensive.
2. Avoiding Confrontation: When dealing with delusional beliefs, arguing against them often leads to increased agitation and defensiveness. Instead, focus on expressing your feelings and concerns without directly challenging his beliefs. For example, you might say, "I feel worried when I hear you talk about these things because I care about you."
3. Encouraging Professional Help: If your uncle's delusions are impacting his daily life or the lives of those around him, it may be necessary to encourage him to seek professional help. This can be a delicate conversation, as individuals with delusions often lack insight into their condition. You might frame it as a way to help him feel better or to address any stress he may be experiencing.
4. Family Support: It’s crucial for family members to support one another in these situations. Consider discussing your concerns with other family members to ensure that everyone is on the same page regarding how to approach your uncle. A united front can be more effective in encouraging him to seek help.
5. Crisis Management: If your uncle’s behavior escalates to the point where he poses a danger to himself or others, it may be necessary to seek immediate help. This could involve contacting mental health professionals or emergency services to ensure his safety.
6. Educating Yourself: Understanding mental health conditions can empower you and your family to respond more effectively. Familiarize yourself with the symptoms and treatment options for conditions like schizophrenia or delusional disorder. This knowledge can help demystify the situation and reduce fear and stigma.
7. Self-Care: Dealing with a family member’s mental health issues can be emotionally taxing. Ensure that you and your family members are taking care of your own mental health as well. This might involve seeking support from friends, engaging in stress-relief activities, or even speaking with a mental health professional yourselves.
In conclusion, navigating the complexities of mental health within a family requires patience, understanding, and sometimes professional intervention. While it can be difficult to witness a loved one struggle with delusions, approaching the situation with empathy and a willingness to seek help can make a significant difference. Remember, you are not alone in this, and there are resources available to support both your uncle and your family as you work through these challenges together.
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