How to Help a Family Member with Obsessive Behaviors - Psychiatry

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I am worried about how to help my family?


Hello, doctor.
I am reaching out because I am unsure of how to handle a situation with a family member who has recently exhibited behaviors that I find concerning.
They can spend over three hours in the shower and take a long time washing their hands, even when they are already clean.
They still believe they haven't washed thoroughly enough and continue to wash, which has caused my family to worry about them.

Additionally, while most people walk in a straight line, this person tends to walk sideways, as if they are afraid of bumping into things, even though there is no real danger.
I am unsure if they are afraid of getting dirty or if they believe this way of walking is cleaner.

In terms of eating, they refuse to share food from the same plate with others and insist on having their own separate plate before they will eat.
This is difficult for me to understand, as our family has always shared meals together, and the food prepared by family members is hygienic.
Why has this fear of sharing suddenly developed?
They often ask questions that they could easily answer themselves, such as whether their hand touched the soup while serving or if they bumped into my chair while walking by.
Their behaviors are affecting my family, disrupting our daily routines.

I would appreciate your guidance on how to address this situation.
Thank you in advance for your help.

Xiao Fen, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2004/11/17

Dr. Chen Wenyu reply Psychiatry


Hello, Xiao Fen: Based on your description, his condition has significantly impacted others, and I can foresee that his current situation should also be affecting his interpersonal, occupational, and social functioning.
Therefore, he needs to receive treatment.
As for his diagnosis, it appears to resemble obsessive-compulsive disorder; however, this symptom may just be a manifestation, and further evaluation is needed to determine if there are any underlying issues.
Thank you for your letter!

Reply Date: 2004/11/17

More Info


Dealing with a family member who exhibits obsessive behaviors can be challenging and distressing for everyone involved. From your description, it seems that your relative is displaying signs of obsessive-compulsive tendencies, which can manifest in various ways, such as excessive washing, avoidance of shared food, and repetitive questioning. These behaviors can significantly impact not only the individual but also the family dynamics and daily life.


Understanding Obsessive Behaviors
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is characterized by unwanted and intrusive thoughts (obsessions) that lead to repetitive behaviors (compulsions) aimed at reducing anxiety or preventing a feared event. In your case, the excessive washing and avoidance of shared food may stem from an underlying fear of contamination or a need for cleanliness. This can be particularly distressing for family members who may not understand the compulsive nature of these behaviors.


Steps to Help Your Family Member
1. Encourage Open Communication: It’s essential to create a safe space for your family member to express their feelings and fears. Approach them with empathy and understanding, rather than judgment. Let them know that you are there to listen without criticism.

2. Educate Yourself and Your Family: Understanding OCD and its symptoms can help you and your family members respond more effectively. Knowledge can reduce stigma and foster compassion. Resources such as books, articles, and reputable websites can provide valuable insights into the disorder.

3. Encourage Professional Help: While it may be challenging, encouraging your family member to seek professional help is crucial. A mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist, can provide a proper diagnosis and treatment plan. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), particularly exposure and response prevention (ERP), is often effective for OCD. If they are resistant to the idea of therapy, you might suggest starting with a general check-up with a doctor to discuss their behaviors and feelings.

4. Set Boundaries: While it’s important to be supportive, it’s equally vital to set boundaries to protect your own mental health. If their behaviors are affecting your daily life, communicate this clearly and kindly. For example, you might explain that while you understand their need for cleanliness, it’s important for you to maintain a shared living environment that feels comfortable for everyone.

5. Promote Healthy Routines: Encourage your family member to engage in healthy activities that can help reduce anxiety, such as exercise, mindfulness, or hobbies. Sometimes, engaging in enjoyable activities can provide a distraction from obsessive thoughts.

6. Be Patient and Supportive: Recovery from OCD can be a long process, and there may be setbacks along the way. It’s important to remain patient and supportive, celebrating small victories and progress.

7. Family Therapy: Consider family therapy as an option. This can help all family members understand the dynamics at play and learn how to support each other better. A therapist can facilitate discussions and help address any underlying issues that may be contributing to the situation.


Conclusion
Dealing with a family member who exhibits obsessive behaviors requires a compassionate and informed approach. By fostering open communication, encouraging professional help, and setting healthy boundaries, you can create a supportive environment that promotes healing. Remember that while you can provide support, the individual must take the steps toward recovery themselves. It’s essential to take care of your own mental health throughout this process, as supporting someone with OCD can be emotionally taxing. Seeking support for yourself, whether through friends, family, or professional counseling, can also be beneficial.

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