Struggling with Erectile Issues at 19: Seeking Help and Hope - Urology

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I'm really sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. It's very important that you talk to someone who can help you, such as a mental health professional or a trusted person in your life


Hello Dr.
Hsu,
I am only 19 years old, but I have been troubled by a problem for a long time! My penis does not seem to fully erect; it just isn't hard enough! I don't experience morning erections, although I never have, but I do sometimes get an erection when I see stimulating adult content (often), but it only reaches about 90 degrees! However, now I can't even get it to 90 degrees, although I still find it easy to get aroused, it just isn't firm enough! When I masturbate, it feels soft! I used to masturbate about three times a week, but when I didn't, I would have nocturnal emissions at night! I used to smoke, and now sometimes I can't even fully urinate, and I occasionally feel pain in my lower back, but it's not muscle pain or bone pain; it's just very strange.
I also feel very sleepy and often have headaches (dizziness) and frequently forget things.
My attention span is poor! What should I do? I live in Taichung and don't know where to seek medical help, plus I only have Sundays off from work!
Importantly, I have a girlfriend, and recently we almost had sexual intercourse, but I had difficulties and couldn't penetrate, so I pretended to have something to do, and we didn't continue! I am too embarrassed to let her know about my issue, as it is extremely humiliating! Please, help me! Otherwise, I am seriously considering suicide!

A-Bao, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2006/08/12

Dr. Xu Weikai reply Urology


A-Bao: Hello, regarding your question, it is really not possible to make a diagnosis based on such a description; it is best to undergo a thorough examination.
It may simply be due to insufficient stimulation, in other words, you may have become accustomed to this level of stimulation (three times a week), and trying a different approach might help.
Note: Smoking can affect sexual function.
Response from Dr.
Hsu Wei-Kai, Director of Urology, Taitung Hospital, Department of Health, Executive Yuan.

Reply Date: 2006/08/12

More Info


It sounds like you are going through a very challenging time, and I want to assure you that you are not alone in this struggle. Erectile dysfunction (ED) at a young age can be distressing, especially when it affects your confidence and relationships. It’s important to understand that many factors can contribute to ED, including psychological, physiological, and lifestyle factors.

Firstly, it's crucial to recognize that experiencing difficulties with erections is not uncommon, even among younger individuals. Stress, anxiety, and depression can significantly impact sexual performance. Given your mention of feeling easily fatigued, experiencing headaches, and having trouble concentrating, it might be beneficial to explore whether these symptoms are related to stress or anxiety. Mental health plays a significant role in sexual function, and addressing any underlying psychological issues can often lead to improvements in erectile function.

Additionally, lifestyle choices can also affect erectile health. You mentioned that you have a history of smoking, which can impair blood flow and lead to erectile issues. If you are still smoking, consider seeking support to quit, as this could have a positive impact on your overall health and sexual function. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep are also essential for maintaining good physical and mental health.
It’s also worth noting that hormonal imbalances, particularly low testosterone levels, can contribute to erectile dysfunction. At your age, this is less common, but it is still a possibility worth discussing with a healthcare professional.
Given your symptoms, including back pain and frequent headaches, it would be wise to consult with a healthcare provider who can perform a thorough evaluation. They can help determine if there are any underlying medical conditions that need to be addressed. It’s understandable to feel embarrassed about discussing these issues, but healthcare professionals are trained to handle such matters with sensitivity and confidentiality.

In terms of where to seek help, consider visiting a urologist or a primary care physician who can provide guidance on erectile dysfunction. If you are concerned about your mental health, a psychologist or psychiatrist can also be beneficial. Many clinics offer flexible hours, and some may even provide telehealth services, allowing you to consult with a doctor without needing to take time off work.

Lastly, I want to emphasize the importance of open communication with your partner. While it may feel daunting, sharing your concerns with your girlfriend can foster understanding and support. It’s likely that she would prefer honesty over feeling confused or rejected.

If you are feeling overwhelmed to the point of considering self-harm, please reach out for immediate help. Contact a trusted friend, family member, or a mental health professional. There are also hotlines available where you can speak to someone who understands what you’re going through.

In summary, while it may feel like you are facing an insurmountable challenge, there are steps you can take to address erectile dysfunction and improve your overall well-being. Seeking professional help is a crucial first step, and with the right support, you can find hope and healing.

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