Overcoming Sexual Anxiety: Solutions for Young Men Facing ED - Internal Medicine

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Please help me, I beg you!!


I am eighteen years old, but I have not engaged in sexual intercourse yet.
However, when I watch adult films and become aroused, if I step away for a moment, I lose my erection.
I have been masturbating since I was around ten years old, sometimes doing it two to three times a day.
Although I have done it less frequently over the past year, I still feel mentally unwell.
I once attempted to have intercourse with my girlfriend, but I don't know if it was due to anxiety or if my penis wasn't hard enough, as I couldn't penetrate.
When I tried to push harder, I ended up ejaculating.
After that, we broke up; she was my only girlfriend.
Please, doctors, help me! I am only eighteen, and I want to know how to address this sexual issue effectively.
Are there any fundamental treatments or other suggestions? Please, I beg you!

Xiao Jie, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2006/09/07

Dr. Yao Quan reply Internal Medicine


Hello: There are many factors that can contribute to erectile dysfunction, and it is advisable to consult a specialist for an evaluation.
It is generally believed that there is no direct relationship with masturbation.
Sincerely, Dr.
Hsiu-Yi Chen, Urologist.

Reply Date: 2006/09/07

More Info


Overcoming sexual anxiety, especially for young men facing erectile dysfunction (ED), can be a challenging experience, but it is important to understand that you are not alone in this struggle. Many young men experience similar issues, and there are effective strategies to address them.

Firstly, it’s essential to recognize that sexual arousal and performance can be influenced by a variety of factors, including psychological stress, anxiety, and physical health. In your case, it seems that anxiety plays a significant role, especially given your experiences with sexual encounters and the pressure you feel to perform. This is a common issue among young men, particularly those who may not have had extensive sexual experience.

One of the most effective ways to combat sexual anxiety is through relaxation techniques. Practicing mindfulness, meditation, or deep-breathing exercises can help reduce anxiety levels and improve your overall mental health. These techniques can help you stay present during intimate moments, allowing you to focus less on performance and more on the experience itself.

Additionally, it’s important to foster a healthy relationship with your body and sexuality. This includes understanding that sexual arousal is a natural physiological response and that it can fluctuate. Watching adult films, while common, can sometimes create unrealistic expectations about sexual performance and body image. It may be beneficial to limit your exposure to such content and instead focus on building genuine connections with potential partners.

Communication is also key. If you find yourself in a relationship, being open and honest with your partner about your feelings and anxieties can create a supportive environment. This can alleviate some of the pressure you may feel during intimate moments. Remember, intimacy is not solely about penetration; it encompasses a wide range of experiences that can be fulfilling and enjoyable.

If you continue to experience difficulties, consider seeking professional help. A therapist or counselor who specializes in sexual health can provide you with tools to manage anxiety and improve your sexual experiences. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is particularly effective for addressing performance anxiety and can help you reframe negative thoughts about sex.

Moreover, it’s crucial to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep can significantly impact your physical and mental well-being. Physical health is closely linked to sexual function, and taking care of your body can enhance your confidence and performance.

Lastly, if you feel that your erectile dysfunction is persistent and significantly affecting your quality of life, consulting a healthcare professional is advisable. They can assess whether there are underlying medical conditions contributing to your ED and discuss potential treatment options, which may include medication or other therapies.

In summary, overcoming sexual anxiety and erectile dysfunction involves a combination of relaxation techniques, open communication, professional support, and healthy lifestyle choices. Remember that sexual experiences are a journey, and it’s okay to take your time to explore and understand your body and desires. With patience and the right strategies, you can navigate this phase of your life successfully.

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