Struggling with Anxiety and Emotional Turmoil: A Mother's Journey

I'm feeling really frustrated?

I am a mother of two children, but I initially thought that marriage would bring me happiness.
However, ever since my youngest son was born, who is now about 1 year and 2 months old, I have been feeling a strong desire to get a divorce.
I have discovered many issues because we live in a four-generation household, so many decisions are made by my grandmother.
Over time, this has led to constant nagging.
My husband also suspects me of drug use and infidelity, which has become very frustrating.
At first, I didn't engage in self-harm, but eventually, I started to.
The most severe incident was when I hit my head against a wall and bled because I wanted to work with my sister, but my husband insisted that I choose between that and staying home.
During a particularly stressful moment, he asked me who had called me, and when I told him to call back himself, we ended up arguing.
I couldn't take it anymore and hit my head against the wall.
Can you please tell me what symptoms I might be experiencing? I previously saw a doctor who diagnosed me with anxiety disorder, but I feel like there is something more going on.
I often struggle to control my emotions, get angry easily, and have a tendency to self-harm.

Baihe, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2007/07/30

Dr. Su Zongwei reply Psychiatry

You have already seen a psychiatrist before, and what you need is to discuss your situation more with the doctor so that they can provide you with the correct assistance.
Additionally, interpersonal issues take time to resolve.
The first step is to improve your own emotional state.
Your condition may have reached a point where medication treatment is necessary.
Only after improving your emotions can you potentially address interpersonal problems.

Reply Date: 2007/07/30

More Info

It sounds like you are going through an incredibly challenging time, and I want to acknowledge the emotional turmoil you are experiencing. Your feelings of anxiety, frustration, and self-harm are serious and deserve attention and care. It’s important to understand that you are not alone in this struggle, and there are ways to find relief and support.

From what you've described, it seems you are dealing with a combination of anxiety and emotional dysregulation. Anxiety can manifest in various ways, including feelings of being overwhelmed, irritability, and difficulty managing emotions. When you mention self-harm, such as hitting your head against the wall, it indicates a level of distress that is concerning and suggests that you may be struggling to cope with your feelings in a healthy way.

The fact that you are feeling trapped in your current situation, especially with the pressures of living in a multi-generational household and dealing with your husband's suspicions, can exacerbate feelings of anxiety. It’s common for individuals in high-stress environments to feel like they are losing control, which can lead to emotional outbursts and self-destructive behavior.

Here are some steps you can take to address your situation:
1. Seek Professional Help: It’s crucial to consult with a mental health professional who can provide a proper assessment and diagnosis. While you mentioned that a doctor previously diagnosed you with anxiety, it may be beneficial to seek a second opinion or further evaluation. A therapist can help you explore your feelings, develop coping strategies, and work through the underlying issues contributing to your distress.

2. Develop Coping Strategies: Learning healthy coping mechanisms is essential. Techniques such as mindfulness, deep breathing exercises, and grounding techniques can help you manage anxiety in the moment. Journaling your thoughts and feelings can also provide an outlet for your emotions and help you process what you are going through.

3. Communicate Openly: If possible, try to have an open conversation with your husband about your feelings and the challenges you are facing. It may help to express how his suspicions and the family dynamics are affecting your mental health. If direct communication feels too difficult, consider involving a therapist who can facilitate these discussions in a safe environment.

4. Establish Boundaries: Living in a multi-generational household can be challenging, especially when it comes to decision-making. It may be helpful to establish clear boundaries regarding responsibilities and authority within the household. This can reduce feelings of frustration and help you regain a sense of control over your environment.

5. Prioritize Self-Care: Taking care of yourself is vital. Make time for activities that you enjoy and that help you relax, whether it's reading, exercising, or spending time with friends. Self-care is not selfish; it’s necessary for your well-being.

6. Support Networks: Reach out to friends, family, or support groups who can provide understanding and encouragement. Sharing your experiences with others who have faced similar challenges can be incredibly validating and helpful.

7. Consider Medication: If your anxiety is significantly impacting your daily life, medication may be an option to discuss with a psychiatrist. Medication can help stabilize mood and reduce anxiety symptoms, making it easier to engage in therapy and other coping strategies.

Remember, it’s okay to ask for help, and taking the first step toward seeking support is a sign of strength. Your well-being is important, and with the right resources and support, you can navigate through this difficult time.

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