Struggling with Emotional Turmoil: Seeking Help for Mental Health Issues - Psychiatry

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I feel like I have a mental health issue! I want to see a doctor for treatment, but I'm afraid the doctor won't be able to identify the cause?


What I find most unbearable is that before any infidelity occurred, I said: "If it happens, that relationship will end." However, I encountered a situation where I couldn't let go (because I wanted to give the other person a chance to start over), yet I couldn't move on.
My mind is filled with chaotic thoughts, and my emotions are unstable.
The people, events, and objects are vividly imprinted in my heart.
I know the person involved, and they have shared their past situations with me, such as where they were intimate.
I have asked them to discard items that should be thrown away, but I sometimes find myself questioning if there are other things I haven't noticed that haven't been discarded.
I feel like I have a mental health issue! I want to seek medical help, but I'm afraid the doctor won't be able to identify the underlying cause.

jiu shi guai, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2008/06/10

Dr. Chen Wenyu reply Psychiatry


It's strange, hello: Actually, only you truly understand yourself, right? Can you really let go to the point where it doesn't affect your future life? Do you think today's forgiveness can bring about lasting peace? Is it really a dilemma whether to continue or not? Some people can let things go, while others simply cannot.
Assessing your own personality is essential to move forward.
Thank you for your message!

Reply Date: 2008/06/10

More Info


It sounds like you are experiencing a significant emotional struggle, particularly in the context of a relationship that has been affected by infidelity. This situation can lead to a whirlwind of emotions, including anger, sadness, confusion, and anxiety. It’s understandable that you feel overwhelmed, especially since you have set clear boundaries for yourself regarding infidelity, yet find yourself in a situation where those boundaries have been crossed.

First and foremost, it’s important to recognize that what you’re feeling is valid. Emotional turmoil, especially in the context of a relationship, can lead to a range of mental health issues, including anxiety and depression. The feelings of being unable to let go, the constant replaying of memories, and the fixation on the past are common reactions to betrayal. This is often compounded by the fact that you know the other person involved, which can make the emotional pain even more intense.

Your mention of feeling like you have a "heart problem" or a "mental illness" indicates a level of distress that should not be taken lightly. It’s crucial to seek professional help, as mental health professionals can provide you with the tools and strategies to cope with your feelings. They can help you process your emotions in a healthy way, rather than allowing them to consume you. Therapy can also provide a safe space to explore your feelings of betrayal, anger, and sadness without judgment.

In therapy, you might explore several approaches. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is particularly effective for addressing negative thought patterns and emotional responses. It can help you identify and challenge the thoughts that are causing you distress, such as the need to hold onto the past or the fixation on the other person’s actions. Mindfulness techniques can also be beneficial, as they encourage you to focus on the present moment rather than getting lost in thoughts about the past or future.

Additionally, it’s essential to develop healthy coping mechanisms. Engaging in activities that promote emotional well-being, such as exercise, journaling, or creative outlets, can help you process your feelings. Surrounding yourself with supportive friends and family can also provide a buffer against the emotional pain you’re experiencing. It’s important to communicate your feelings to those you trust, as they can offer support and understanding.

You mentioned a fear that a doctor might not understand your situation or be able to identify the underlying issues. It’s important to remember that mental health professionals are trained to listen and help you navigate complex emotional landscapes. Be open and honest about your feelings and experiences during your sessions. This transparency will allow them to provide the best possible care tailored to your needs.

Lastly, consider the importance of self-compassion during this time. It’s easy to be hard on yourself for feeling the way you do, but it’s crucial to acknowledge that healing takes time. Allow yourself to feel your emotions without judgment, and recognize that it’s okay to seek help when you need it.

In summary, your emotional turmoil is a significant issue that deserves attention and care. Seeking help from a mental health professional can provide you with the support and tools you need to navigate this challenging time. Remember, you are not alone in this, and there are ways to find peace and healing.

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