Delayed Ejaculation: Causes and Solutions for Couples

Q: Delayed Ejaculation: Causes and Solutions for Couples

Ms. <br>Hsu： Hello, ejaculation and erection are governed by two different sets of nerve pathways. <br>Generally, if one intentionally prolongs an erection, leading to overstimulation of the first set of nerves, it can indeed affect the second set of nerves. <br>In other words, i

Ejaculation

My husband and I have been married for 10 years.
Every time we have intercourse, it takes him a long time to feel the need to ejaculate, often lasting almost an hour.
When he finally reaches the point of ejaculation, he seems to struggle to do so, showing a painful expression.
I feel that he may have delayed ejaculation (ejaculatory dysfunction).
This happens almost every time we have sex, which makes me feel anxious during intercourse, knowing it takes him so long to feel the urge to ejaculate.

Miss Hsu, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2009/06/23

Dr. Xu Weikai reply Urology

Ms.
Hsu: Hello, ejaculation and erection are governed by two different sets of nerve pathways.
Generally, if one intentionally prolongs an erection, leading to overstimulation of the first set of nerves, it can indeed affect the second set of nerves.
In other words, it may result in difficulty achieving ejaculation.
Some individuals may experience abnormal erections due to irregular tumors or electrical discharges in the brain.
Most cases involve the intentional delay of ejaculation, where techniques such as slowing down just before ejaculation become habitual, thereby suppressing the second set of nerves and making it difficult to ejaculate.
I believe there are two ways to improve this situation: 1.
Increase stimulation, meaning you should make an effort to enhance stimulation when you notice your partner starting to slow down or take a break, encouraging him to ejaculate sooner.
(Of course, communication between both partners is essential.) 2.
Directly communicate with your partner about your feelings; he may believe that a longer erection enhances your experience.
It can be very helpful to sincerely express your own feelings to him.
If there are any unclear points, please feel free to ask again, and we can discuss and explore this further.

Sincerely,
Director of Urology, Taitung Hospital, Department of Health, Executive Yuan
Dr.
Wei-Kai Hsu

Reply Date: 2009/06/23

More Info

Delayed ejaculation is a condition that can significantly impact a couple's sexual relationship, leading to frustration and anxiety for both partners. Understanding the causes and potential solutions can help address this issue effectively.

Causes of Delayed Ejaculation:
1. Psychological Factors: Stress, anxiety, and depression are common psychological contributors to delayed ejaculation. Performance anxiety, particularly in long-term relationships, can create a cycle of worry that makes it even harder to achieve ejaculation. If your husband feels pressured to perform or is preoccupied with other life stressors, this can inhibit his sexual response.

2. Medical Conditions: Certain medical conditions, such as diabetes, multiple sclerosis, or hormonal imbalances, can affect nerve function and blood flow, leading to difficulties in ejaculation. Medications, particularly antidepressants and blood pressure medications, can also have side effects that delay ejaculation.

3. Relationship Dynamics: The emotional and physical dynamics of a relationship can influence sexual performance. If there are unresolved issues or a lack of intimacy, this can manifest in sexual difficulties. Communication between partners is crucial in understanding each other's needs and concerns.

4. Age: As men age, changes in hormone levels and sexual function can lead to delayed ejaculation. This is a natural part of aging, but it can be exacerbated by other factors such as health issues or lifestyle choices.

5. Substance Use: Alcohol and recreational drugs can impair sexual function, including ejaculation. If your husband consumes these substances, it may be worth discussing their impact on his sexual health.

Solutions for Delayed Ejaculation:
1. Open Communication: Discussing the issue openly with your husband can alleviate some of the anxiety surrounding sexual performance. Encourage him to express his feelings and concerns, and share your own as well. This can foster a supportive environment where both partners feel comfortable.

2. Consult a Healthcare Professional: It may be beneficial for your husband to consult a urologist or a sexual health specialist. They can conduct a thorough evaluation to rule out any underlying medical conditions and discuss potential treatment options. This may include medication adjustments if he is currently taking any.

3. Therapy: Individual or couples therapy can be an effective way to address psychological factors contributing to delayed ejaculation. A therapist can help both partners explore any underlying issues and develop strategies to improve intimacy and sexual satisfaction.

4. Relaxation Techniques: Encouraging your husband to practice relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing or mindfulness, can help reduce anxiety during sexual encounters. Creating a relaxed and comfortable environment can also enhance the sexual experience.

5. Exploring Different Techniques: Sometimes, changing the approach to sexual activity can help. Experimenting with different positions, techniques, or even taking breaks during intercourse can relieve pressure and make the experience more enjoyable.

6. Pelvic Floor Exercises: Strengthening the pelvic floor muscles through exercises like Kegels can improve sexual function for both partners. These exercises can enhance control over ejaculation and improve overall sexual satisfaction.

7. Patience and Understanding: It's essential to approach this issue with patience and understanding. Delayed ejaculation can be frustrating, but working together as a couple to find solutions can strengthen your relationship.

In conclusion, delayed ejaculation is a multifaceted issue that can stem from various psychological and physiological factors. By fostering open communication, seeking professional help, and exploring different techniques, couples can work together to address this challenge and enhance their sexual relationship. Remember, it's important to approach this situation with empathy and support for one another.

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