I feel very anxious and I also have a strong urge to harm others?
When I'm at home alone, I often feel very anxious and have thoughts of wanting to harm myself.
I'm particularly afraid of being alone at night when everything is dark.
Recently, my mother-in-law has been coming to my house frequently and constantly nagging me, either about drinking beverages or not having a job, saying that I will have to rely on others in the future.
I can't stand how they treat me; I feel like I want to hurt my mother-in-law.
If I can't hurt her, I might end up harming myself.
Doctor, my legs are injured, but it's not due to self-harm.
Both of my legs have wounds the size of ten-dollar coins, and they hurt a lot.
MM, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2012/07/08
Dr. Lin Junyuan reply Psychiatry
Hello, since you already have an appointment, please take the time to discuss it during your visit.
Thank you!
Reply Date: 2012/07/08
More Info
It sounds like you're going through a very challenging time, and it's important to acknowledge the feelings of anxiety and impulsive thoughts that you're experiencing. Your situation is complex, and it’s crucial to approach it with care and understanding.
Firstly, feeling anxious and having thoughts of self-harm can be signs of underlying mental health issues, such as anxiety disorders or depression. It’s essential to recognize that these feelings are valid and that seeking help is a strong and courageous step. You mentioned feeling particularly anxious when alone at home, especially at night when it’s dark. This is a common experience for many people who struggle with anxiety, as darkness can amplify feelings of fear and vulnerability.
The presence of your in-laws and their comments about your drinking habits and employment status seems to be adding to your stress. It’s understandable to feel overwhelmed by their criticisms, especially if you’re already feeling anxious. It’s important to communicate your feelings to them if you feel safe doing so. Let them know that their comments are affecting you negatively. Setting boundaries can be a healthy way to protect your mental well-being.
Regarding your thoughts of harming yourself or others, it’s crucial to take these feelings seriously. If you ever feel that you might act on these thoughts, it’s vital to seek immediate help. This could mean contacting a mental health professional, a trusted friend, or a crisis hotline. In the U.S., the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255) and can provide support 24/7.
You mentioned that you have injuries on your legs, which you clarified are not self-inflicted. It’s important to take care of any physical injuries you have and to seek medical attention if necessary. Physical pain can exacerbate emotional distress, so addressing any physical health issues is a critical part of your overall well-being.
In terms of managing anxiety and impulsive thoughts, consider the following strategies:
1. Professional Help: Engaging with a mental health professional can provide you with the tools and support you need to navigate your feelings. Therapy can help you explore the root causes of your anxiety and develop coping strategies.
2. Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Practices such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga can help reduce anxiety. These techniques can ground you in the present moment and help manage overwhelming feelings.
3. Journaling: Writing down your thoughts and feelings can be a therapeutic way to process what you’re experiencing. It can also help you identify triggers for your anxiety and impulsive thoughts.
4. Support Network: Reach out to friends or family members who you trust. Sharing your feelings with someone who understands can provide relief and reduce feelings of isolation.
5. Limit Exposure to Stressors: If certain situations or people increase your anxiety, try to limit your exposure to them when possible. This might mean spending less time with your in-laws if their comments are distressing.
6. Healthy Coping Mechanisms: Instead of resorting to self-harm or harmful thoughts, find healthier outlets for your emotions. This could include physical activities, creative pursuits, or engaging in hobbies that bring you joy.
7. Emergency Plan: If you ever feel overwhelmed, have a plan in place for what to do. This could include a list of people to call, places to go, or activities that help you calm down.
Remember, you are not alone in this struggle, and there are people and resources available to help you through it. Taking the first step to seek help is a significant move towards healing. Your feelings are important, and you deserve support and understanding as you navigate this difficult time.
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