Inability to maintain an erection?
After being married for six months, I was able to successfully penetrate during the first few times, but now whenever I try to penetrate, I experience erectile dysfunction, even though I can maintain a normal erection before attempting penetration.
What should I do? (I only experience loss of erection at the moment of penetration.)
Zhang, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2002/03/13
Dr. Xu Wencang reply Urology
Mr.
Zhang, based on your symptoms, it appears that you do not have organic erectile dysfunction, as you are able to achieve erections in the morning and during normal circumstances.
The possible causes may be psychological or related to technique.
Generally, individuals can achieve an erection, experience a natural decline, and then become erect again.
You can conduct an experiment: when you are erect, if you apply pressure to the penis, the erection will subside.
Then, by stimulating it again, you can achieve another erection.
This can help alleviate the fear of not being able to achieve an erection after it subsides.
Given your situation, it is important to first rule out any underlying anxiety related to deep-seated conflicts or marital issues.
If such issues exist, seeking help from a psychiatrist would be advisable.
Additionally, if there is a curvature of the penis causing pain during intercourse, you should consult a physician for correction or use some lubricants or baby oil to reduce discomfort.
Cooperative treatment with your partner is crucial.
Gentle stimulation to achieve an erection, allowing it to subside naturally, and then stimulating it again can help restore your confidence.
A temporary failure can be overcome with appropriate stimulation.
Initially, avoid intercourse and try to engage in mutual stimulation with your partner until climax and ejaculation, which will demonstrate that you can achieve normal erections and satisfy your partner.
Eventually, when you progress to intercourse, it should become more manageable.
If difficulties persist, it is okay to revert to the previous step and continue trying.
Reply Date: 2002/03/13
More Info
Erection issues during intercourse can be a complex problem that many men face at some point in their lives. The situation you described, where you can maintain an erection until the moment of penetration, is not uncommon and can be attributed to a variety of psychological and physiological factors.
Firstly, it's essential to understand that erectile function is influenced by both physical and mental health. When a man is aroused, the brain sends signals to the blood vessels in the penis to relax, allowing blood to flow in and create an erection. However, if there is anxiety, stress, or performance pressure at the moment of penetration, it can disrupt this process, leading to difficulties in maintaining an erection.
Here are some potential reasons for the issue you are experiencing:
1. Performance Anxiety: This is one of the most common psychological factors affecting erectile function. The pressure to perform can create anxiety, which may lead to a loss of erection when attempting penetration. This anxiety can stem from fear of failure, concerns about sexual performance, or even past experiences.
2. Relationship Dynamics: Sometimes, issues within the relationship can contribute to erectile dysfunction. Communication problems, unresolved conflicts, or emotional disconnect can create a barrier to intimacy, leading to difficulties during intercourse.
3. Physical Factors: While you mentioned that you can maintain an erection before penetration, it’s still important to consider any underlying physical health issues. Conditions such as diabetes, cardiovascular disease, or hormonal imbalances can affect erectile function. However, since your issue occurs specifically at the moment of penetration, this is less likely to be the primary cause.
4. Nervousness or Stress: Situational stressors, whether related to work, personal life, or even the act of intercourse itself, can lead to temporary erectile issues. The body’s stress response can inhibit the physiological processes necessary for maintaining an erection.
5. Substance Use: Alcohol and certain medications can also impact erectile function. If you consume alcohol before intercourse, it may initially help with relaxation but can ultimately impair your ability to maintain an erection.
To address this issue, consider the following steps:
- Open Communication: Talk to your partner about your feelings and experiences. Open dialogue can reduce anxiety and create a supportive environment for both of you.
- Relaxation Techniques: Engage in relaxation exercises such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga to help reduce anxiety and stress levels.
- Seek Professional Help: If the problem persists, consider consulting a healthcare professional or a therapist who specializes in sexual health. They can provide guidance tailored to your specific situation and may recommend therapy or counseling.
- Focus on Foreplay: Instead of concentrating solely on penetration, focus on other forms of intimacy and pleasure. This can help reduce performance pressure and enhance overall sexual experience.
- Limit Alcohol and Avoid Drugs: If you consume alcohol or use recreational drugs, consider reducing or eliminating them, as they can negatively impact erectile function.
In conclusion, erectile issues during intercourse can stem from a combination of psychological and physiological factors. Understanding the underlying causes and addressing them through communication, relaxation techniques, and professional support can significantly improve your sexual health and overall relationship satisfaction. If the problem continues, do not hesitate to seek medical advice, as there are effective treatments available that can help.
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