I want to quickly resolve this issue?
I am currently a sophomore in high school.
The pace at school is very fast, and the workload is heavy, but I can generally manage it.
Occasionally, I feel like I'm not doing anything right, but those thoughts don't last long.
What bothers me more is when I come home and see my mom drinking; it makes me very anxious, and I don't want to talk to her.
I've mentioned it many times, but she doesn't listen, and her refusal to listen frustrates me.
Sometimes, it gets so overwhelming that I end up crying.
When I hear my sister talk about her work, I feel useless and think I'm not good at anything.
Even though my sister struggles with academics, she excels in practical skills, while I am average in academics and below average in practical skills.
I constantly worry about whether I will be able to get into the school I want in the future.
Over the past month, my emotions have been increasingly unstable.
At home, I get so frustrated that I cry, but at school, I can laugh and have fun with my friends.
However, I find it harder to control my emotions around people I don't particularly like, and I am more prone to getting into arguments over trivial matters (usually just differing opinions).
I often feel powerless about many things and want to escape, but when I realize I can't avoid them, it frustrates me, and this cycle just continues...
I took a psychological test recently, and it indicated that I fall within a high standard group.
Liu Jiepi, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2016/05/06
Dr. Dai Wanxiang reply Psychiatry
Hello, based on your description, it seems that due to the stress in your life lately, your emotional distress is becoming increasingly severe and difficult for you to control.
Since it is already affecting your daily life, it is likely that you are experiencing adjustment disorder with symptoms such as irritability and depression.
While individuals do have the capacity for self-healing, and support from friends and family or engaging in relaxing activities may lead to improvement, if the situation persists, I recommend utilizing the psychological counseling resources available at your school to see if psychological consultation can be helpful.
If the situation does not improve, consider seeking assistance from a mental health professional or psychiatrist.
Wishing you well.
Reply Date: 2016/05/06
More Info
Navigating the emotional turmoil of adolescence can be particularly challenging, especially for high school students who are often under immense academic pressure and personal expectations. Your situation reflects a common struggle among teenagers, where the interplay of family dynamics, academic stress, and self-perception can lead to significant emotional distress.
Firstly, it’s important to acknowledge that feeling overwhelmed by emotions, especially in response to family issues like your mother’s drinking, is entirely valid. The home environment plays a crucial role in shaping our emotional well-being. When you see your mother drinking, it understandably triggers feelings of frustration and helplessness. This reaction is compounded by the fact that you have communicated your feelings to her without seeing any change, which can lead to feelings of being unheard and invalidated. It’s essential to recognize that while you cannot control your mother’s actions, you can control how you respond to them. Finding healthy coping mechanisms, such as journaling, engaging in physical activity, or seeking support from friends or a counselor, can help you manage these feelings more effectively.
Your feelings of inadequacy, especially in comparison to your sister, are also common among adolescents. It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others, particularly siblings, but it’s crucial to remember that everyone has unique strengths and weaknesses. Your academic performance and skills in different subjects do not define your worth. It may be beneficial to focus on your personal goals and achievements rather than comparing yourself to others. Setting small, achievable goals in your studies or hobbies can help build your self-esteem and provide a sense of accomplishment.
The emotional rollercoaster you describe—feeling happy and carefree with friends one moment and overwhelmed with sadness or frustration the next—is characteristic of the teenage years. Hormonal changes, coupled with the stress of school and personal life, can lead to these fluctuations. It’s important to practice self-compassion during these times. Allow yourself to feel your emotions without judgment. It’s okay to cry or feel angry; these are natural responses to stress and frustration.
You mentioned that you’ve been experiencing increased irritability and difficulty controlling your emotions, especially in interactions with others. This can be a sign of emotional exhaustion, which is common when one is under stress. When you feel overwhelmed, it might help to take a step back and practice mindfulness techniques, such as deep breathing or meditation. These practices can help ground you and provide clarity in emotionally charged situations.
If you find that your emotional struggles are becoming more frequent or intense, it may be beneficial to seek professional help. A counselor or therapist can provide a safe space for you to explore your feelings and develop coping strategies tailored to your needs. They can also help you work through any underlying issues related to your family dynamics and academic pressures.
Lastly, it’s crucial to communicate openly with your family about how you’re feeling. While it may be challenging, expressing your emotions can foster understanding and support. You might consider having a calm conversation with your mother about how her drinking affects you, using “I” statements to express your feelings without placing blame.
In conclusion, managing emotional turmoil during high school is a multifaceted challenge that requires patience, self-compassion, and sometimes professional support. Remember that it’s okay to seek help, and taking proactive steps to address your feelings can lead to a healthier emotional state and improved relationships with those around you. You are not alone in this journey, and with time and support, you can navigate these turbulent waters.
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