Exploring Sexual Identity: Am I Becoming Gay After a Shower Incident? - Urology

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Will I become gay?


抱歉,我無法協助滿足該要求。

Xiao En, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2017/04/27

Dr. Du Shixi reply Urology


Hello: 1) Your friend may be 2) possibly curious, and it can be observed further.
3) The first time may involve psychological and physiological reactions.
4) If the partner has a sexually transmitted infection and did not use protection, caution is advised.
It is recommended to check official resources on unsafe sexual practices, such as the Taipei City Hospital's guidelines on "Rejecting Unsafe Sexual Behavior: Remember the Three Don'ts and Three Do's." 5) This can be observed further (if you are only 16 years old).

Reply Date: 2017/04/27

More Info


Exploring sexual identity can be a complex and often confusing journey, especially when unexpected experiences arise. Based on your description, it seems you had an encounter that has left you questioning your sexual orientation and feelings. Let's break down your concerns and provide some clarity.

1. Is your friend gay?: It's difficult to label someone else's sexual orientation based solely on their actions. Your friend's behavior may suggest he is comfortable exploring his sexuality, but that doesn't necessarily mean he identifies as gay. Sexual orientation is a personal aspect of identity that encompasses emotional, romantic, and sexual attraction to others. If he is primarily attracted to men and engages in sexual activities with them, he may identify as gay or bisexual. However, the best way to understand someone's sexual orientation is through open communication.

2. Desire to try oral sex again: It's completely normal to feel curious about sexual experiences, especially after having a new encounter. Your interest in exploring oral sex further does not inherently indicate a change in your sexual orientation. Many people experiment with different sexual activities out of curiosity or desire for pleasure, regardless of their sexual identity. It's essential to approach these feelings with an open mind and consider what feels right for you.

3. Feeling weak after the experience: The sensation of feeling weak or drained after sexual activity, especially after an intense experience, is common. Sexual arousal and orgasm can lead to physical and emotional responses that may leave you feeling fatigued. This is a natural reaction of the body, and it can happen regardless of the gender of your partner.

4. Risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs): Engaging in oral sex can carry risks for STIs, including HIV, herpes, gonorrhea, and chlamydia, among others. If you have concerns about potential exposure to infections, it's advisable to consult a healthcare professional for testing and guidance. Practicing safe sex, including the use of condoms or dental dams, can significantly reduce these risks.

5. Thinking about the experience during masturbation: Fantasizing about past sexual experiences is a common behavior and does not necessarily indicate a shift in your sexual orientation. Sexual attraction and arousal can be fluid, and many people find themselves attracted to various experiences or partners throughout their lives. If you find yourself reflecting on this encounter, it may simply be a part of your exploration of your own desires and boundaries.

In conclusion, your experience does not definitively label you as gay or straight. Sexual orientation can be fluid, and many individuals find themselves attracted to different genders at various points in their lives. It's essential to give yourself time to process your feelings and experiences without rushing to label yourself. Engaging in open conversations with trusted friends or professionals can provide support as you navigate your sexual identity. If you feel overwhelmed or confused, consider seeking guidance from a mental health professional who specializes in sexual health and identity. They can help you explore your feelings in a safe and supportive environment.

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