Am I Experiencing Depression? Signs and Symptoms to Consider

Is this depression?

I feel unhappy almost every day.
It's not that I'm extremely sad or in a bad mood, but I just don't feel happy.
I've lost interest in things I used to enjoy and feel indifferent towards everything.
I perceive the things I'm doing as things I dislike.
When I'm bored, I experience dizziness and headaches.
I've noticed that I tend to compare myself to others and feel the need to excel; if I'm not the best, I feel worthless.
During middle school, the pressure was really intense.
I'm not a naturally good student, but I tried hard.
However, many adults would say I was just playing around because I couldn't finish my homework or my grades weren't ideal.
That really hurt me because I genuinely put in my best effort.
I had no friends in class.
I used to be cheerful and talkative, but I've completely transformed into a different person.
I feel extremely empty and lonely every day.
I enrolled in a vocational school chosen by my parents, which I don't like at all, and they don't care about my thoughts.
Since middle school, I've become easily angered, prone to throwing things, and I often cry on the floor because I feel so terrible and inferior to others.
Occasionally, I self-harm and sometimes have thoughts of suicide, feeling like my existence is a waste of resources and a burden to others.
I believe I'm lowering the standards of this world.
The person I hate the most is myself; I despise my uselessness and think that if I were dead, I wouldn't waste anyone's efforts.
Although I've made friends since attending vocational school, I still don't know why my situation hasn't improved.
I don't want to go out and find daily life to be dull and monotonous.
Sometimes, I isolate myself and don't want to talk to anyone.
Should I seek professional help for this?

Qian, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2017/09/07

Dr. Zhang Fangrong reply Psychiatry

Dear Sir/Madam,
From your letter, I can sense the emotions and distress you are currently experiencing due to changes in your mood, thoughts, and daily life.
It is concerning that you have even engaged in self-harming behaviors and have had negative thoughts, which are significantly impacting your emotional well-being and daily functioning.
These changes are quite different from your usual self, and part of this may stem from a lack of affirmation from your family, leading to difficulties in self-affirmation.
This indicates that we should pay close attention to your situation.
I recommend that you talk to close family members or friends about your feelings, or seek support from a school counselor to discuss your emotions and possible changes.
I hope you can prepare to face and address these issues together, believing that tomorrow will be better.
If there is no improvement, consider seeking help from a psychologist or psychiatrist.
Wishing you peace and joy.
Sincerely,
Dr.
Zhang Fangrong
Psychiatrist

Reply Date: 2017/09/07

More Info

Based on your description, it sounds like you are experiencing a range of symptoms that are commonly associated with depression. Depression is a serious mental health condition that can significantly affect your daily life, emotional well-being, and overall functioning. Here are some signs and symptoms to consider:
1. Persistent Sadness or Low Mood: You mentioned feeling unhappy almost every day, which is a core symptom of depression. This feeling can be more than just sadness; it can manifest as a general sense of emptiness or hopelessness.

2. Loss of Interest: A significant sign of depression is the loss of interest or pleasure in activities that you once enjoyed. You noted that you no longer find joy in things you used to love, which is a common experience for those with depression.

3. Feelings of Worthlessness or Guilt: You expressed feelings of being a "failure" or "worthless" when comparing yourself to others. This negative self-perception is often amplified in individuals with depression.

4. Physical Symptoms: You mentioned experiencing headaches and dizziness when feeling bored or overwhelmed. Physical symptoms such as fatigue, changes in appetite, and sleep disturbances are also common in depression.

5. Emotional Instability: You described becoming easily angered and having outbursts, which can be a sign of emotional dysregulation often seen in depression.

6. Social Withdrawal: Feeling lonely and isolating yourself from others, even when you have friends, can indicate depression. The desire to avoid social interactions is a common coping mechanism for those struggling with their mental health.

7. Thoughts of Self-Harm or Suicide: You mentioned having thoughts of self-harm and feeling that your existence is a burden to others. This is a serious symptom that requires immediate attention and intervention.

Given these symptoms, it is crucial to seek professional help. Depression is a treatable condition, and mental health professionals can provide support through therapy, medication, or a combination of both. Here are some steps you can take:
- Talk to Someone: Reach out to a trusted friend or family member about how you’re feeling. Sometimes, just sharing your thoughts can provide relief.

- Consult a Mental Health Professional: A psychologist or psychiatrist can conduct a thorough assessment and help you understand your feelings better. They can also provide a diagnosis and recommend treatment options.

- School Counseling Services: If you are in school, consider speaking with a school counselor. They can provide support and help you navigate your feelings in a safe environment.

- Emergency Help: If you ever feel like you might harm yourself or have thoughts of suicide, it is essential to seek immediate help. Contact a crisis hotline, go to an emergency room, or call emergency services.

- Self-Care: While professional help is vital, engaging in self-care practices can also be beneficial. This includes maintaining a routine, engaging in physical activity, eating well, and finding small ways to enjoy life.

Remember, you are not alone in this struggle, and there are people and resources available to help you through it. Taking the first step to seek help can be daunting, but it is a crucial move toward feeling better. Your feelings are valid, and addressing them is a sign of strength, not weakness.

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