Overcoming Intrusive Thoughts: Managing Anxiety About HIV and Infection Risks

Obsessive thinking

Hello, doctor.
I always worry and fear about contracting sexually transmitted diseases, especially HIV.
Whenever I see blood or anything red, I become particularly anxious! About 3 to 4 years ago, I visited a psychiatrist who said I might be experiencing obsessive thoughts.
They prescribed me medication, and after taking it for a little over a month, I realized that I was overthinking, so I decided not to rely on medication and wanted to recover on my own.
Eventually, I’m not sure when, but I seemed to get better, not completely, but I stopped fixating on things.
Over the years, I still occasionally worry about whether I might contract an STD from touching something, but I only think about it briefly and don’t dwell on it.
However, recently my condition seems to have worsened.
I have never had sexual experience, but I worry about contracting HIV from contact with blood.
I read online that if blood comes into contact with the eyes, there could be a risk, and although the risk is low, sometimes if I worry about something splashing in my eyes or if I rub my eyes, I become anxious.
I also worry about touching blood and then rubbing my eyes.
There was even a time when a friend was injured and bleeding, and I might have touched their blood.
Later, when I got home, my family was helping to bathe a child, and they asked me to hand them a towel.
I started to think, what if I touched my friend's blood and then handed the towel to my family to wipe the child’s body, and if it accidentally touched the child's private area, could I unintentionally cause the child to contract HIV? I don’t want to harm others and feel like it’s my fault for not being careful.
There was also a time at a convenience store when the cashier was bleeding while giving me change, and I might have come into contact with their bleeding wound, and then I rubbed my eyes, worrying about contracting HIV.
Although the chances of contracting HIV this way are very low, I still think, what if… I always try to rationalize things, but it seems I can’t.
Sometimes I feel like I understand, but then I get busy and suddenly think about it again, and I feel overwhelmed.
I don’t want to see a psychiatrist again; I want to overcome my mental barriers on my own.
Doctor, do you have any suggestions for methods I could try?

Niming, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2023/08/15

Dr. Qiu Junda reply Psychiatry

Hello.
Your condition still requires medical attention.
Seeking medical care does not necessarily mean you need medication; sometimes, psychological therapy can be arranged.
You can discuss this with your physician during your visit.
If you still have concerns or find it inconvenient, you can first use the 1925 hotline for a similar online consultation to facilitate an early improvement.

Reply Date: 2023/08/15

More Info

It's understandable to feel anxious about health issues, especially concerning HIV and other sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Your concerns about potential exposure to HIV through contact with blood or other bodily fluids are common, particularly among individuals who have experienced anxiety or obsessive-compulsive tendencies in the past. Here are some insights and strategies to help you manage your anxiety and intrusive thoughts regarding HIV and infection risks.

Understanding HIV Transmission
First, it's important to clarify how HIV is transmitted. HIV is primarily spread through specific high-risk behaviors, including unprotected sexual intercourse, sharing needles, and from mother to child during childbirth or breastfeeding. Casual contact, such as touching blood and then rubbing your eyes, poses a very low risk of transmission. The virus does not survive long outside the human body, and it cannot be transmitted through casual contact or environmental surfaces.

Managing Anxiety and Intrusive Thoughts
1. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): While you mentioned a desire to manage your anxiety without medication, CBT is a highly effective therapeutic approach for addressing intrusive thoughts and anxiety. It helps you identify and challenge irrational fears and replace them with more balanced thoughts. Even if you prefer not to see a therapist, you can practice CBT techniques on your own by keeping a journal of your thoughts and actively disputing negative beliefs.

2. Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Mindfulness practices, such as meditation and deep breathing exercises, can help ground you in the present moment and reduce anxiety. When you notice intrusive thoughts about HIV or infection risks, take a moment to breathe deeply and focus on your surroundings. This can help you detach from the anxiety-provoking thoughts.

3. Limit Exposure to Triggers: If certain situations or information increase your anxiety (like reading about HIV transmission online), consider limiting your exposure to these triggers. Instead, focus on reliable sources of information and educate yourself about HIV in a way that empowers you rather than frightens you.

4. Develop a Support System: Sharing your feelings with trusted friends or family members can provide emotional support. Sometimes, just talking about your fears can help alleviate them. If you feel comfortable, consider joining a support group for individuals dealing with similar anxieties.

5. Practice Self-Compassion: It's essential to be kind to yourself during this process. Acknowledge that anxiety is a common human experience and that it's okay to have fears. Remind yourself that you are taking steps to manage your anxiety and that progress may take time.

6. Engage in Healthy Activities: Regular physical activity, hobbies, and social interactions can significantly improve your mental health. Engaging in activities you enjoy can distract you from anxious thoughts and help you feel more grounded.

7. Educate Yourself: Knowledge is power. Understanding the facts about HIV transmission and the actual risks involved can help reduce fear. Consider reaching out to healthcare professionals for accurate information and reassurance.

Conclusion
While it's natural to have concerns about health and safety, especially regarding HIV, it's crucial to recognize when these thoughts become intrusive and affect your daily life. By implementing strategies such as CBT, mindfulness, and self-compassion, you can work towards managing your anxiety effectively. If you find that your anxiety continues to interfere with your quality of life, consider seeking professional help, even if it's just for a few sessions to provide guidance and support. Remember, you are not alone in this journey, and there are resources available to help you navigate your feelings and fears.

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