I am gay?
I'm a middle school student, and every time we go to the restroom, everyone tends to compare.
Therefore, we habitually stand close to the urinals to avoid being seen.
One time, a young PE teacher (probably in his 20s) came in to use the restroom, and my classmates and I curiously looked over at him.
He then said to us, "What are you looking at? Mine is bigger than yours..." Since that incident, I've felt even more insecure.
Why can some people be so arrogant? Also, why are we curious about the genitalia of the same sex? Am I gay?
Tong, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2004/01/31
Dr. Liu Jianting reply Urology
Don't overthink it.
Everyone develops at their own pace, and faster development isn't necessarily better.
Moreover, since you are in your puberty, your body is undergoing significant changes.
Generally, every man will have a body type that suits him, so there's no need to worry!
Reply Date: 2004/01/31
More Info
It's completely normal to have questions about your sexual orientation, especially during adolescence when you're experiencing many changes both physically and emotionally. The feelings of curiosity and attraction can be confusing, and it's important to remember that exploring these feelings is a natural part of growing up.
From what you've described, it seems like you're grappling with feelings of curiosity about both your own body and the bodies of others, particularly those of the same sex. This curiosity is common among teenagers and does not necessarily indicate that you are gay. Many young people experience moments of attraction or interest in their peers, regardless of gender, as they navigate their identities and relationships.
It's also important to recognize that sexual orientation is not always black and white. Some people identify as gay, some as straight, and others as bisexual or queer. It's possible that you may be experiencing a range of feelings that could change over time. The key is to give yourself the space to explore these feelings without pressure to label yourself immediately.
Feeling self-conscious or insecure, especially in situations like using a public restroom, is also a common experience during adolescence. Peer comparisons can lead to feelings of inadequacy, but it's crucial to remember that everyone is unique, and self-worth should not be based on physical attributes or how you compare to others. Building self-confidence takes time, and it can be helpful to focus on your strengths and interests outside of physical appearance.
If you're feeling overwhelmed by these thoughts or if they are affecting your self-esteem, consider talking to someone you trust, like a parent, teacher, or school counselor. They can provide support and help you navigate these feelings. Additionally, seeking out resources or communities that discuss sexual orientation and identity can also be beneficial. Understanding that many others share similar experiences can help alleviate feelings of isolation.
In summary, questioning your sexual orientation is a normal part of growing up. It's okay to be curious and to explore your feelings without rushing to label yourself. Focus on understanding yourself better and building your self-confidence, and remember that it's perfectly fine to take your time in figuring things out.
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