Am I Experiencing Depression? Signs and Concerns for New Moms - Psychiatry

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Could you please clarify if this aligns with depression?


Doctor, I have had thoughts of self-harm during my pregnancy.
I also experience many of the depressive symptoms mentioned in previous Q&As and have been in that state for a long time.
As an unmarried mother, I often argue with my child's father, who frequently criticizes me and exhibits very traditional masculine behavior.
Recently, I have been having suicidal thoughts, but I have refrained from acting on them because I worry about what would happen to my child if I were gone.
I have been crying frequently and feel very useless.
I don't have many friends and spend almost every day locked in my room.
When I take my child out, we return within ten minutes.
I can't find anyone to talk to.
I want to discuss my emotions from the past few days with my family, but they believe I am mentally and physically healthy and tell me that I am not sick.
I haven't shared my thoughts of self-harm with them.
Now, whenever my child cries, I feel overwhelmed and have the urge to just walk away.
Could this mean that I have depression?

Chen Ma, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2007/09/15

Dr. Duan Yongzhang reply Psychiatry


It is not possible to make a determination based on the written description.
Please visit the outpatient clinic for an in-person consultation with a physician, who will provide the necessary assistance.

Reply Date: 2007/09/15

More Info


It sounds like you are going through an incredibly difficult time, and I want to acknowledge the pain and distress you are experiencing. From what you've described, it is indeed possible that you are experiencing symptoms of depression, particularly given your feelings of hopelessness, isolation, and the recurrent thoughts of self-harm. These feelings can be particularly intense for new mothers, as the transition to motherhood can bring about significant emotional and psychological challenges.

Depression in new mothers, often referred to as postpartum depression (PPD), can manifest in various ways. Common symptoms include persistent sadness, anxiety, irritability, feelings of worthlessness, and difficulty bonding with the baby. It can also lead to physical symptoms such as fatigue, changes in sleep patterns, and appetite disturbances. The fact that you are feeling overwhelmed by your emotions, crying frequently, and feeling like you have no one to talk to are all significant indicators that you may be struggling with depression.

The situation with your child's father seems to be adding to your stress. Constant conflict in a relationship can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy and despair, especially when you are already feeling vulnerable. It’s important to recognize that you are not alone in this experience; many new mothers face similar challenges, and it is crucial to seek support.

Here are some steps you can take to address your situation:
1. Seek Professional Help: It is vital to talk to a mental health professional who can provide a proper assessment and support. A psychologist or psychiatrist can help you understand your feelings and may recommend therapy or medication if necessary. Many healthcare providers are sensitive to the needs of new mothers and can offer tailored support.

2. Reach Out for Support: While it may feel like you have no one to talk to, consider reaching out to friends, family, or support groups for new mothers. Sometimes, just sharing your feelings with someone who understands can provide relief. If your family is dismissive of your feelings, look for local or online support groups where you can connect with others who are experiencing similar challenges.

3. Practice Self-Care: Although it may be difficult, try to carve out some time for yourself each day, even if it’s just a few minutes. Engage in activities that you enjoy or find relaxing, whether it’s reading, taking a walk, or practicing mindfulness. Self-care is essential for your mental health.

4. Communicate with Your Child’s Father: If possible, try to have an open conversation with your child's father about how you are feeling. Expressing your feelings and concerns might help him understand your perspective better and could lead to a more supportive environment.

5. Emergency Support: If you ever feel that you might act on your thoughts of self-harm, it is crucial to seek immediate help. Contact a crisis hotline or go to the nearest emergency room. Your safety and well-being are the top priority.

6. Educate Yourself: Understanding more about postpartum depression and its effects can empower you. Knowledge can help you recognize that what you are experiencing is a medical condition, not a personal failure.

Remember, reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. You deserve support and care during this challenging time. It’s important to take your feelings seriously and to seek the help you need to navigate through this period. You are not alone, and there are people and resources available to help you through this.

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