Anxiety and Emotional Distress in New Mothers

Q: Anxiety and Emotional Distress in New Mothers

To the inquiring netizen： Based on your description, it seems you may be experiencing a recurrence of depression-related psychosomatic symptoms, and the situation appears to be somewhat severe and urgent. <br>It is advisable to have a friend or family member accompany you to a ps

I don't know what's wrong with me?

Hello, I am married and have a one-and-a-half-year-old son.
Recently, I really don't know what's wrong with me.
I had depression in middle school, but after stopping medication on my own, I haven't seen a doctor since then.
Lately, I've been feeling easily anxious and irritable, and I even lack desire for intimacy with my husband, which has led him to express some mild complaints.
However, nothing significant has happened recently, and I can't understand why I'm feeling this way.
I'm also experiencing insomnia, and I've always needed to dream in order to sleep.
Recently, I've done three distressing things that make me feel very guilty: First, I don't know why I pinched my son's face until he turned red and cried, and I was so startled that I let go, but at that moment, I felt nothing and just watched.
Second, I pinched myself at night until I couldn't breathe, which also caused my throat to hurt the next day.
Third, a few days later, I somehow pressed my son's head underwater for two seconds while he was bathing, and he cried out loudly, which terrified me.
I quickly wrapped him up and comforted him.
I really don't know what's happening to me; I never used to be like this.
I've also been dreaming about my own death lately, and I'm really going crazy.
My husband is a professional soldier and is only home for 12 days a month, but I don't feel this way when he is home.
I love my son very much, especially since he is my first child and my first pregnancy, and my husband and I were really looking forward to it.
But I don't know what's wrong with me, and I constantly feel guilty.
I am a stay-at-home mom.

Wen, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2015/09/25

Dr. Huang Weiqin reply Psychiatry

To the inquiring netizen: Based on your description, it seems you may be experiencing a recurrence of depression-related psychosomatic symptoms, and the situation appears to be somewhat severe and urgent.
It is advisable to have a friend or family member accompany you to a psychiatric (or psychosomatic) clinic or emergency department as soon as possible, so that a psychiatrist can assist with the necessary evaluation and treatment.
(If you are willing to accept treatment, this condition typically improves within one to two weeks after starting antidepressant medication.) I hope this response is helpful.
Thank you for your inquiry, and I wish you peace and health.

Reply Date: 2015/09/25

More Info

It sounds like you are going through an incredibly challenging time, and I want to emphasize that you are not alone in feeling this way. Many new mothers experience anxiety, emotional distress, and even symptoms of postpartum depression. Your feelings of anxiety, irritability, and the troubling actions you've described are serious and warrant immediate attention.

First and foremost, it’s crucial to understand that what you are experiencing may be a manifestation of postpartum depression (PPD) or postpartum anxiety (PPA). These conditions can occur after childbirth and can significantly affect a mother's mental health and her ability to care for her child. Symptoms can include persistent sadness, anxiety, irritability, changes in sleep patterns, and even thoughts of self-harm or harming others, which you have described. It's important to recognize that these feelings are not a reflection of your character or your love for your child; they are symptoms of a medical condition that can be treated.

Given your history of depression during your teenage years, it is possible that you may be more susceptible to experiencing similar issues now, especially with the added stressors of motherhood. The fact that you have experienced thoughts of harming yourself or your child is particularly concerning and indicates that you should seek professional help immediately. These thoughts can be alarming, but they are not uncommon in individuals experiencing severe anxiety or depression.

Here are some steps you can take:
1. Seek Professional Help: It is vital to consult with a mental health professional, such as a psychiatrist or psychologist, who specializes in postpartum issues. They can provide a thorough assessment and recommend appropriate treatment options, which may include therapy and medication. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is often effective for anxiety and depression.

2. Talk to Your Partner: Open communication with your husband about your feelings and experiences is essential. He may not fully understand what you are going through, but sharing your struggles can help him provide the support you need. His role as a supportive partner is crucial, especially given his limited time at home.

3. Reach Out for Support: Consider joining a support group for new mothers. Connecting with others who are experiencing similar feelings can help you feel less isolated. Many communities offer resources for new parents, including counseling services and support groups.

4. Practice Self-Care: While it may feel difficult, try to carve out time for self-care. This could be as simple as taking a short walk, practicing mindfulness or meditation, or engaging in a hobby you enjoy. Self-care is not selfish; it is necessary for your well-being.

5. Monitor Your Thoughts and Feelings: Keeping a journal can help you track your emotions and identify triggers for your anxiety or distress. Writing down your feelings can also serve as a therapeutic outlet.

6. Emergency Help: If you ever feel like you might harm yourself or your child, it is crucial to seek emergency help immediately. Contact a crisis hotline or go to the nearest emergency room.

Remember, reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. You deserve support and care during this challenging time. With the right treatment and support, many women find relief from their symptoms and can enjoy motherhood more fully. Please take care of yourself and prioritize your mental health.

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