Having sex with my girlfriend doesn't feel much, and I have difficulty ejaculating?
Hello doctor, you may have misunderstood my meaning.
I can achieve an erection normally...
When I was younger, I used to rub against the bed for masturbation.
Now, when I try to masturbate using my hand, I can't reach orgasm.
I also can't climax during intercourse with my girlfriend; the sensation during penetration isn't very strong, but I can climax quickly when rubbing against the bed.
Doctor, could it be that my penis has become desensitized from the pressure? How can I improve this? Thank you, doctor.
Xiao Shu, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2014/05/19
Dr. Xu Weikai reply Urology
Hello, it may indeed be due to insufficient stimulation.
This means that greater stimulation is needed to trigger ejaculation.
If there are any unclear points, feel free to ask again, and we can discuss and research further.
Responses on the internet should only be taken as references; if necessary, it is important to seek medical attention at a healthcare facility.
This message is from Dr.
Hsu Wei-kai, Director of the Urology Department at Taitung Hospital, Ministry of Health and Welfare, who cares about your well-being.
Reply Date: 2014/05/19
More Info
Low sensitivity and ejaculation issues during sexual relationships can be complex and multifaceted, often involving both physiological and psychological factors. Based on the information provided, it seems that you are experiencing a lack of sensitivity during sexual activities, despite being able to achieve an erection. This situation can be frustrating and may lead to concerns about sexual performance and satisfaction for both you and your partner.
Understanding the Issue
1. Physiological Factors:
- Nerve Sensitivity: The penis has a high concentration of nerve endings, particularly in the glans (the head of the penis). If there has been excessive pressure or friction applied to the penis over time, such as through aggressive masturbation techniques, it could potentially lead to a temporary decrease in sensitivity. This is sometimes referred to as "desensitization."
- Blood Flow: Adequate blood flow is crucial for sexual arousal and sensitivity. Factors such as alcohol consumption, smoking, or certain medications can affect blood circulation, leading to diminished sensitivity and difficulty in ejaculation.
- Hormonal Levels: Testosterone plays a significant role in sexual desire and function. Low testosterone levels can lead to decreased libido and sensitivity. If you suspect hormonal imbalances, it may be worth discussing this with a healthcare provider.
2. Psychological Factors:
- Anxiety and Stress: Performance anxiety can significantly impact sexual function. Worrying about whether you will be able to ejaculate or feel pleasure can create a cycle of anxiety that further inhibits your ability to enjoy sexual experiences.
- Expectations and Pressure: If you have set high expectations for your sexual performance or feel pressured to achieve certain outcomes, this can lead to a disconnect between your physical sensations and emotional responses during sex.
Recommendations for Improvement
1. Change in Techniques:
- Experiment with different methods of stimulation. If you find that certain techniques lead to better sensitivity, incorporate those into your sexual activities. You might also consider varying the pressure and speed during masturbation and sexual intercourse to find what feels best for you.
- Consider using lubrication during sexual activities, as this can enhance sensitivity and reduce friction, potentially leading to a more pleasurable experience.
2. Mindfulness and Relaxation:
- Practice mindfulness techniques to help reduce anxiety during sexual encounters. Focusing on the sensations and being present in the moment can help improve your overall sexual experience.
- Engage in relaxation exercises, such as deep breathing or meditation, before sexual activity to help alleviate performance anxiety.
3. Communication with Partner:
- Openly discuss your feelings and experiences with your partner. This can help both of you understand each other's needs and expectations, fostering a more supportive and enjoyable sexual relationship.
- Encourage your partner to explore different forms of intimacy that may not solely focus on penetration, such as oral sex or mutual masturbation, which can help build comfort and connection.
4. Consult a Healthcare Professional:
- If the issues persist, consider seeking advice from a healthcare provider or a sex therapist. They can help identify any underlying medical conditions or psychological factors that may be contributing to your symptoms and provide tailored treatment options.
5. Limit Alcohol Consumption:
- If you suspect that alcohol may be affecting your sensitivity and sexual performance, consider reducing your intake, especially before engaging in sexual activities.
Conclusion
Low sensitivity and ejaculation issues can stem from a combination of physiological and psychological factors. By exploring different techniques, practicing mindfulness, communicating openly with your partner, and seeking professional guidance if necessary, you can work towards improving your sexual experiences. Remember that sexual health is an important aspect of overall well-being, and addressing these concerns can lead to a more fulfilling intimate life.
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