How to Encourage a Loved One with Mental Health Issues to Seek Help

When a patient does not believe they are ill, how can you encourage them to seek medical attention?

Regarding the topic, a friend’s mother exhibits several characteristics suggestive of bipolar disorder, such as extreme irritability, impulsive spending, loud speech, frequent outbursts, and an inability to tolerate jokes at her expense.
There was even an incident where, while driving from Taipei to the south for a trip, she had an episode that required the entire family to turn back to Taipei immediately from Taichung.
Given that she believes she has no issues, how can we help her recognize that she has a problem? Alternatively, how can we persuade her to accept treatment? Are there any methods that do not involve medication, but rather rely on lifestyle changes we can implement, such as dietary adjustments or exercise, to improve her condition?

Kunao de ren, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2016/02/28

Dr. Liang Sunyuan reply Psychiatry

When advising an elder to seek medical attention, it is generally more effective if they feel our concern for their well-being and our desire to help them alleviate their troubles.
If they perceive our approach as accusatory or belittling, they may become defensive or angry.
It is advisable to start with a suggestive tone and to respect their choices.
We can adopt the attitude taught in the Analects: "In dealing with parents, offer gentle advice; if they do not follow your wishes, continue to show respect without resentment." Present your suggestions sincerely and kindly, articulating your concerns and the reasons behind your recommendations in a calm manner.
If they choose not to listen, continue to respect and care for them, waiting for a better opportunity to discuss the matter again.
In daily life, regular exercise, adequate sleep, and balanced nutrition can have protective effects on emotional well-being.
Additionally, a supportive and warm family atmosphere is also a crucial protective factor.
Wishing you all the best.

Reply Date: 2016/02/28

More Info

Encouraging a loved one with mental health issues to seek help can be a challenging yet crucial endeavor. In the case of your friend's mother, who exhibits symptoms suggestive of bipolar disorder, it is essential to approach the situation with empathy, understanding, and patience. Here are some strategies to consider:

1. Open a Dialogue
Start by creating a safe space for conversation. Choose a calm moment to express your concerns without judgment. Use "I" statements to communicate how her behavior affects you and others, such as "I feel worried when I see you upset." This approach can help her feel less defensive and more open to discussing her feelings.

2. Educate Yourself and Her
Understanding bipolar disorder and its symptoms can help both you and your friend’s mother. Share information about the condition in a non-confrontational way. You might say, "I read about how mood swings can affect people, and it made me think of you. Have you ever felt like this?" Providing educational resources can help her recognize her symptoms without feeling attacked.

3. Encourage Professional Help
Suggesting professional help can be sensitive. Frame it as a way to improve her quality of life rather than a necessity due to a "problem." You could say, "Talking to someone who understands these feelings can be really helpful. It might give you new tools to manage your emotions." Emphasize that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

4. Offer Support
Let her know that you are there for her throughout the process. Offer to accompany her to appointments or help her find a therapist. Sometimes, the thought of seeking help can be overwhelming, and having a supportive friend can make a significant difference.

5. Suggest Lifestyle Changes
While professional help is often necessary, lifestyle changes can also play a role in managing symptoms. Encourage her to engage in regular physical activity, which has been shown to improve mood and reduce anxiety. Suggest activities like walking, yoga, or dancing. Additionally, a balanced diet rich in omega-3 fatty acids, whole grains, and plenty of fruits and vegetables can support mental health. Encourage her to limit caffeine and sugar, which can exacerbate mood swings.

6. Practice Patience and Understanding
Change takes time, especially when it comes to mental health. Your friend’s mother may not be ready to acknowledge her issues immediately. Be patient and continue to offer your support without pushing too hard. Celebrate small victories, such as her agreeing to talk to someone, even if it’s just a friend or family member.

7. Set Boundaries
While it’s important to support your friend’s mother, it’s equally crucial to set boundaries to protect your own mental health. If her behavior becomes too overwhelming or harmful, it’s okay to step back and take care of yourself.

8. Encourage Self-Reflection
Encourage her to reflect on her feelings and behaviors. Journaling can be a powerful tool for self-discovery. Suggest that she write down her thoughts and emotions, which can help her identify patterns and triggers.

9. Be a Role Model
Demonstrate healthy coping mechanisms in your own life. Share your experiences with stress management, therapy, or self-care practices. This can normalize the idea of seeking help and make it seem more approachable.

Conclusion
Encouraging a loved one to seek help for mental health issues requires a delicate balance of empathy, education, and support. While it may be challenging, your efforts can significantly impact her willingness to acknowledge her struggles and seek the help she needs. Remember, the journey to mental wellness is often non-linear, and your continued support can make a meaningful difference in her life.

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