Mother is unable to control herself?
Hello Dr.
Song, I left a message for you on March 29th this year.
My mother, whose last name is Hu, has her next appointment on June 27th.
Previously, we discussed her stealing money to gamble and lying.
There has been some improvement since she started a small business, but recently she mentioned that she still cannot control herself from going to those places.
She finds herself going there without realizing it, spends all the money she earns at once, and then starts making excuses for herself.
She is also insisting on divorcing my father.
How can we improve this situation? Should we adjust her medication during the next visit, or should I take her to register for an appointment?
Niming, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2016/05/12
Dr. Song Chengxian reply Psychiatry
Hello, concerned friend of your mother: Based on your description, it is currently difficult to determine whether this behavior is part of a medical condition or if there are other reasons causing your mother to be unable to let go.
You or your father are welcome to accompany your mother for a consultation, so we can explore potential causes together and discuss ways to improve self-control.
Sincerely, Dr.
Song.
Reply Date: 2016/05/12
More Info
Dealing with impulse control issues, especially in the context of mental health, can be a challenging journey for both the individual affected and their family members. In your case, it sounds like your mother is struggling with compulsive behaviors related to gambling, which can be deeply distressing for everyone involved. Here are some insights and recommendations based on your situation.
Firstly, it’s important to understand that impulse control disorders, including compulsive gambling, can be linked to various underlying mental health issues. These may include mood disorders, anxiety disorders, or even substance use disorders. The inability to control impulses often leads to significant distress not only for the individual but also for their loved ones. In your mother’s case, her behavior of spending all her earnings and seeking excuses for her actions indicates a struggle with impulse control that may require professional intervention.
Given that your mother has already been in treatment, it’s crucial to maintain open communication with her healthcare provider. During her next appointment on June 27, you should discuss her recent behaviors and the impact they have on her life and your family. It may be beneficial to bring up the following points during the consultation:
1. Medication Adjustment: If your mother is currently on medication, it might be necessary to evaluate its effectiveness. Sometimes, medications that are intended to help with impulse control may need to be adjusted or changed. Be sure to discuss any side effects or changes in her behavior since starting the medication.
2. Therapeutic Support: In addition to medication, therapy can be an essential component of treatment for impulse control issues. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) has been shown to be effective in helping individuals understand and change their thought patterns and behaviors. If your mother is not currently in therapy, you might want to suggest that she consider it.
3. Family Involvement: Family therapy can also be beneficial. It allows family members to express their concerns and feelings in a safe environment and learn how to support each other better. This could help improve communication and reduce the tension surrounding her behaviors.
4. Support Groups: Encourage your mother to consider joining a support group for individuals struggling with gambling addiction. These groups provide a sense of community and understanding, which can be incredibly helpful in recovery.
5. Crisis Plan: Given her recent threats of divorce and her impulsive spending, it may be wise to develop a crisis plan. This plan should outline steps to take if she feels overwhelmed or if her behavior escalates. Having a clear plan can help reduce anxiety for both her and the family.
6. Monitoring and Accountability: If possible, help her set up a system of accountability regarding her finances. This could involve limiting access to cash or credit cards or having a trusted family member help manage her finances temporarily.
7. Open Dialogue: Maintain an open line of communication with your mother. Encourage her to share her feelings and struggles without fear of judgment. This can help her feel supported and less isolated in her experiences.
In conclusion, addressing impulse control issues, particularly in the context of gambling, requires a multifaceted approach that includes medical, therapeutic, and familial support. By working closely with her healthcare provider and involving the family in her treatment plan, you can help your mother navigate this difficult time more effectively. Remember, recovery is a journey, and it’s essential to be patient and supportive throughout the process.
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