Fear of speaking sounds?
Since childhood, I have struggled to refuse others; I would agree to any request within my ability.
After being bullied in junior high, I began to fear hearing others speak once I entered high school.
At school, I started having difficulty understanding what my classmates were saying, and I felt anxious when talking to teachers and classmates, wanting to quickly end the conversation.
At home, I would isolate myself in my room, but even hearing voices outside the door would make me feel suffocated, regardless of whether I could understand them.
I began to feel depressed and wanted to cry.
Eventually, I would hurt myself, throw things, or dwell on negative memories.
Now, I find it nearly impossible to communicate with others in a normal emotional state, whether through voice or text.
I overthink whether there are hidden meanings behind what others say.
I still cannot bring myself to read the contents of birthday cards written by my classmates.
What should I do about these symptoms?
Huang, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2017/07/15
Dr. Liang Sunyuan reply Psychiatry
Hello Ms.
Huang: When a person experiences anxiety and fear, they may sometimes encounter a phenomenon similar to a brain freeze, where they are unable to receive information or think clearly.
It seems that your level of anxiety is quite high, and you are also exhibiting some symptoms of depression, along with excessive negative associations.
I suggest starting at home by trying to stay in conversational situations for a few more minutes to gradually get accustomed to the feeling of dialogue.
You can also pay attention to the conversations among family members—what they talk about and how they respond—focusing your attention on them to learn, rather than on yourself.
Once you become accustomed to this, you can further practice and adapt in the same way with your friends.
If you continue to feel troubled, I recommend seeking medical assistance.
Wishing you all the best.
Reply Date: 2017/07/15
More Info
Overcoming the fear of conversations, especially when it stems from past trauma such as bullying, can be a challenging journey. Your experiences highlight a common issue faced by many individuals who struggle with social anxiety and the repercussions of negative social interactions. It’s important to recognize that you are not alone in this, and there are effective strategies to help you navigate these feelings and improve your communication skills.
Firstly, it’s crucial to understand the nature of your anxiety. Social anxiety often manifests as an intense fear of being judged or embarrassed in social situations. This can lead to avoidance behaviors, such as isolating yourself or feeling overwhelmed by the mere sound of conversation. These feelings can be exacerbated by past experiences, such as bullying, which can create a lasting impact on your self-esteem and confidence in social settings.
One of the first steps in overcoming this fear is to acknowledge your feelings and understand that they are valid. It’s okay to feel anxious about conversations, especially if you have had negative experiences in the past. However, it’s also important to challenge these feelings and not let them dictate your actions. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is a highly effective treatment for social anxiety. It involves identifying negative thought patterns and replacing them with more positive, realistic ones. For instance, instead of thinking, “Everyone will judge me if I say something wrong,” you can reframe it to, “Most people are focused on their own thoughts and are not judging me as harshly as I think.”
Another helpful approach is gradual exposure. Start by engaging in low-stakes conversations, such as greeting a neighbor or making small talk with a cashier. Gradually increase the complexity of your interactions as you become more comfortable. This method allows you to build confidence over time and helps desensitize you to the fear of conversation.
Practicing mindfulness and relaxation techniques can also be beneficial. When you feel anxious, your body goes into a fight-or-flight response, which can make it hard to think clearly. Techniques such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or mindfulness meditation can help calm your mind and body, making it easier to engage in conversations. You might find it helpful to practice these techniques before entering a social situation.
Additionally, consider seeking support from a mental health professional. Therapy can provide you with a safe space to explore your feelings and develop coping strategies tailored to your needs. A therapist can also help you work through any underlying issues related to your past experiences, such as bullying, and guide you in building healthier relationships with others.
It’s also important to cultivate a supportive social network. Surround yourself with people who understand your struggles and can provide encouragement. This could be friends, family, or even support groups for individuals dealing with similar issues. Sharing your experiences with others can help alleviate feelings of isolation and provide you with valuable insights and coping strategies.
Lastly, be patient with yourself. Overcoming the fear of conversations is a process that takes time and practice. Celebrate small victories along the way, and don’t be discouraged by setbacks. Each step you take towards engaging with others is a step towards building your confidence and improving your mental health.
In summary, overcoming the fear of conversations involves understanding your anxiety, challenging negative thought patterns, gradually exposing yourself to social situations, practicing relaxation techniques, seeking professional support, and building a supportive network. With time and effort, you can learn to communicate more comfortably and confidently, allowing you to engage more fully in your life and relationships.
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