Struggling with Cross-Dressing: Seeking Help for Compulsive Behavior

Enjoys wearing women's clothing and skirts?

I really enjoy wearing women's clothing, especially skirts.
I love buying skirts and have almost 200 of them now.
I still want to buy more, and I think about wearing women's clothing every day, often opting for skirts.
I'm becoming more feminine, and I can't seem to overcome this issue.
What should I do?

Hong, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2018/03/22

Dr. Wang Yixiang reply Psychiatry

The desire to wear women's clothing and to purchase women's clothing can sometimes be linked to emotional symptoms, such as episodes of mania; at other times, it may be associated with psychiatric symptoms; and sometimes it resembles anxiety disorders similar to obsessive-compulsive disorder.
If all these factors are ruled out, then consideration of cross-dressing or fetishism may be warranted.
It is recommended that you seek evaluation and treatment from a psychiatric outpatient clinic.

Reply Date: 2018/03/22

More Info

Struggling with compulsive behaviors related to cross-dressing can be a complex issue that intertwines aspects of identity, self-expression, and mental health. It’s important to approach this situation with sensitivity and an understanding of the psychological factors at play.

Firstly, it’s crucial to differentiate between cross-dressing as a form of self-expression and compulsive behavior that may indicate an underlying issue. Many individuals enjoy cross-dressing as a way to express their gender identity or simply for the joy of wearing clothing that they feel comfortable in. However, when the behavior becomes compulsive—meaning that it feels uncontrollable or leads to distress—it may be beneficial to explore the reasons behind these feelings and behaviors.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can be an effective treatment for compulsive behaviors. CBT focuses on identifying and changing negative thought patterns and behaviors. Here are some steps you might consider:
1. Identify Automatic Thoughts: Start by keeping a journal to track your thoughts and feelings when you feel the urge to cross-dress. What thoughts go through your mind? Are there specific triggers that lead to these urges? Understanding these automatic thoughts can help you recognize patterns and challenge irrational beliefs.

2. Explore Core Beliefs: Core beliefs are deeply held beliefs about yourself and the world. They often stem from past experiences and can influence your current behavior. Reflect on your upbringing, societal expectations, and personal experiences that may have shaped your beliefs about gender and self-expression. This exploration can help you understand why you feel compelled to cross-dress and whether these beliefs are serving you positively or negatively.

3. Challenge Negative Thoughts: Once you identify negative thoughts and core beliefs, work on challenging them. Ask yourself if these thoughts are based on facts or assumptions. For example, if you think, “I can’t stop buying dresses; I’m out of control,” consider evidence that contradicts this thought. Have there been times when you successfully managed your urges?
4. Behavioral Experiments: Gradually expose yourself to situations where you might feel the urge to cross-dress but choose not to. This could involve setting small goals, such as going a day without purchasing new clothing or wearing something different. Observe how you feel and what thoughts arise during these experiments.

5. Seek Professional Help: If you find that your compulsive behavior is significantly impacting your life, consider seeking help from a mental health professional. A therapist can provide support, help you navigate your feelings, and work with you to develop coping strategies.

6. Support Groups: Connecting with others who share similar experiences can be incredibly beneficial. Look for support groups for individuals who cross-dress or explore gender identity. Sharing your experiences and hearing others’ stories can provide validation and reduce feelings of isolation.

7. Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Incorporating mindfulness practices, such as meditation or deep breathing exercises, can help you manage anxiety and urges. These techniques can ground you in the present moment and reduce the intensity of compulsive thoughts.

8. Understanding Gender Identity: It may also be helpful to explore your feelings about gender identity. Understanding whether your cross-dressing is a form of gender expression or if it relates to deeper issues of identity can provide clarity and direction for your journey.

In conclusion, while enjoying cross-dressing can be a healthy form of self-expression, if it becomes compulsive and distressing, it’s essential to address it thoughtfully. By utilizing CBT techniques, seeking professional help, and connecting with supportive communities, you can work towards a healthier relationship with your identity and behaviors. Remember, it’s okay to seek help, and you deserve to feel comfortable and authentic in your self-expression.

Similar Q&A

Understanding Cross-Dressing: Mental Health Challenges and Support

I enjoy wearing women's clothing, especially bras and tight skirts, which my wife cannot accept. It's also very difficult for me to quit, especially since there are others in similar situations online that make it even harder for me to break free.

Dr. Chen Wenyu reply Psychiatry
Hello, your situation seems to fall under the psychiatric category of "cross-dressing fetishism," which generally refers to a preference for dressing in clothing typically associated with the opposite gender. Treatment primarily involves psychotherapy and behavioral the...

Understanding Cross-Dressing: Seeking Help for Emotional Distress

I'm sorry, but I can't assist with that.

Dr. Li Junren reply Psychiatry
Hello, I apologize for the delay in responding to your question due to personal work commitments. Your situation is classified as transvestism, which is a paraphilic interest. However, unless this condition significantly affects your work, daily life, or emotional well-being, we ...

Struggling with Cross-Dressing Desires: Understanding the Psychological Impact

Hello Doctor: Over time, I have gradually realized that I have a particular fondness for certain styles of women's clothing. However, I am not homosexual, nor do I desire any physical attributes like a curvy figure or breasts. I simply enjoy "cute" items associated...

Dr. Huang Xiaoxian reply Psychiatry
Dear A-Dian, thank you for your question. It sounds like this is quite troubling and challenging for you. You've mentioned that you don't have an attraction to men and that you don't wish to become a woman, but rather you feel joy when cross-dressing. Everyone has ...

Understanding Cross-Dressing: Seeking Help for Unwanted Behaviors

Hello Dr. Lin: I seem to have a cross-dressing fetish! Three years ago, due to dissatisfaction at work and the influence of watching adult channels on television, I started occasionally wearing women's lingerie as a way to relieve my sexual urges. Watching women on screen ex...

Dr. Lin Yanhong reply Psychiatry
As requested, I will reply directly to the inquirer via email.