I feel like someone is constantly monitoring me?
I am a social worker, but I have been unable to work in the field for over three years.
I graduated from the Department of Cultural and Social Welfare and passed the social worker examination.
However, after developing autism and experiencing episodes of psychosis, I feel like my life is falling apart.
I feel as though I am being monitored at home, and I spend long periods in my room.
I hear strange voices talking to me, and my emotions have been quite unstable lately.
I have had thoughts of suicide, but I lack the courage to act on them.
I have been hospitalized in the psychiatric ward of Taipei Veterans General Hospital six times, and I am unsure when I might face a seventh admission.
Recently, I find it difficult to control my thoughts, and I am constantly affected by negative emotions.
I am not working, except for attending a community rehabilitation center in Taoyuan, where I fold paper lotus flowers.
I feel lost and uncertain about my future.
Younger Elementary Student, 20~29 year old female. Ask Date: 2021/12/28
Dr. Wu Enliang reply Psychiatry
Hello, online friend: I wonder if you have discussed these matters with your physician? Generally, after adjusting medication, conditions tend to improve.
Of course, I am also concerned that you may not be consistently taking your medication or receiving long-acting injection therapy.
There is always hope, and since you are still so young and previously had good functionality, as long as you collaborate well with your physician and the instructors at the rehabilitation center, you will gradually improve.
Keep it up! Dr.
Wu Enliang
Reply Date: 2021/12/28
More Info
It sounds like you are going through an incredibly challenging time, and I want to acknowledge the depth of your struggles. As a social worker, you have dedicated your life to helping others, but it seems that you are now facing significant mental health challenges yourself. The feelings of being watched, hearing strange voices, and experiencing emotional instability can be incredibly distressing and isolating. It's important to know that you are not alone in this, and there are ways to seek help and support.
First and foremost, it is crucial to address your mental health concerns with a qualified professional. Given your history of hospitalization and the symptoms you are experiencing, it may be beneficial to consult with a psychiatrist or a psychologist who specializes in mental health disorders. They can provide a comprehensive evaluation and help determine the best course of treatment for you, which may include therapy, medication, or a combination of both. It’s understandable to feel hesitant about seeking help, especially after multiple hospitalizations, but finding the right support can make a significant difference in your recovery journey.
The symptoms you describe, such as feeling watched and hearing voices, may be indicative of a serious mental health condition, such as schizophrenia or a related disorder. These experiences can lead to feelings of paranoia and anxiety, which can further exacerbate your emotional instability. It’s essential to communicate openly with your healthcare provider about these symptoms so they can tailor a treatment plan that addresses your specific needs.
In addition to professional help, there are several strategies you can implement to manage your mental health on a daily basis. Engaging in activities that promote relaxation and mindfulness, such as meditation, yoga, or deep-breathing exercises, can help reduce anxiety and improve your emotional state. Creative outlets, like the origami you mentioned, can also serve as a therapeutic tool to express your feelings and distract your mind from negative thoughts.
Building a support network is another vital aspect of managing mental health challenges. While it may feel difficult to reach out, connecting with friends, family, or support groups can provide a sense of community and understanding. Sharing your experiences with others who have faced similar challenges can help alleviate feelings of isolation and provide valuable insights into coping strategies.
It’s also important to establish a daily routine that includes physical activity, healthy eating, and adequate sleep. Regular exercise has been shown to have a positive impact on mental health by releasing endorphins, which can improve mood and reduce feelings of anxiety. Even short walks or gentle stretching can be beneficial.
Lastly, if you ever feel overwhelmed by thoughts of self-harm or suicide, it’s crucial to seek immediate help. Contact a crisis hotline, reach out to a trusted friend or family member, or go to the nearest emergency room. Your safety is the top priority, and there are people who care and want to help you through this difficult time.
In summary, while your current situation may feel hopeless, there is hope for recovery and improvement. Seeking professional help, engaging in self-care practices, building a support network, and maintaining a healthy lifestyle can all contribute to your healing journey. Remember, it’s okay to ask for help, and taking that first step can lead to a brighter future.
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