I've been feeling really down lately..?
Hello Dr.
Chen: Recently, I've been feeling down to the lowest point...
partly because of my gender and partly because of my parents...
One day, I watched a program hosted by a transgender person.
The show was interesting, so I kept watching.
Suddenly, my mom came over and turned off the TV, saying, "What are you watching this freak for? Do you want to become like her? I can't stand looking at her." I was speechless...
Why do adults always have such narrow views? Why can't they change their own perspectives and instead lecture their children? Is it really so amusing to use derogatory terms like "freak"? Why do we still criticize others who are also human? What is the difference between being born this way or that way...
the only difference is the ability to reproduce.
That’s the only distinction.
Using terms like "freak" is equivalent to insulting others...
Who invented these terms anyway? I wish these people would just keep quiet...
I often feel like I want to die...
I hate myself for not being born a girl.
Because of these thoughts, I've also resented my parents...
and I've hated them for their beliefs...
In the end, there's one question I've always wanted to ask...
Can I take a gender identity test online?
*Xiezi*, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2005/10/07
Dr. Chen Wenyu reply Psychiatry
Hello, regarding the immense pressure you are facing, it's understandable that it can affect your mood.
Additionally, I haven't paid much attention to your age; during adolescence, individuals often experience some issues related to gender identity.
As I've mentioned before, seeking early psychiatric consultation for counseling and support is advisable.
As for gender transition, it may only be possible after reaching adulthood, and by then, societal perceptions may have significantly evolved.
As for online sexual orientation tests, they should only be considered as a reference.
Thank you for your message!
Reply Date: 2005/10/07
More Info
Understanding mental health struggles related to gender identity is a complex and sensitive topic that requires compassion and a nuanced approach. Your feelings of confusion, frustration, and sadness are valid and reflect the challenges many individuals face when navigating their gender identity in a society that often holds rigid views on gender roles and expressions.
Firstly, it's important to recognize that gender identity is distinct from biological sex. While biological sex is assigned at birth based on physical characteristics, gender identity is an individual's internal sense of their own gender, which may or may not align with their biological sex. This can lead to feelings of gender dysphoria, where a person feels discomfort or distress due to a mismatch between their gender identity and their assigned sex at birth. The experience of gender dysphoria can be exacerbated by societal pressures, stigma, and discrimination, which can significantly impact mental health.
Your experience with your mother's reaction to the transgender host on the television highlights a common issue: the generational gap in understanding and acceptance of gender diversity. Many older generations may hold onto traditional views of gender, which can lead to misunderstandings and hurtful comments. It's crucial to approach these conversations with patience, as changing deeply ingrained beliefs takes time. However, it is equally important to prioritize your mental health and well-being in the process.
Feeling like you want to die or experiencing self-hatred due to your gender identity is a serious concern. These feelings can stem from societal rejection, internalized stigma, and the pressure to conform to traditional gender norms. It's essential to seek support from mental health professionals who are knowledgeable about gender identity issues. Therapy can provide a safe space to explore your feelings, understand your identity, and develop coping strategies for dealing with external pressures.
If you are considering gender identity assessments or tests, it’s important to remember that these tools can provide insights but should not be seen as definitive measures of your identity. Gender identity is a personal journey that may not fit neatly into predefined categories. Engaging with supportive communities, whether online or in-person, can also be beneficial. These spaces often provide validation and understanding from others who share similar experiences.
In terms of family dynamics, it may be helpful to have open and honest conversations with your parents about your feelings. If you feel safe doing so, express how their comments affect you and share your perspective on gender identity. This can be a challenging conversation, but it may help them understand your experiences better. If direct communication feels too daunting, consider involving a trusted family member or a counselor who can mediate the discussion.
Lastly, remember that you are not alone in this journey. Many individuals face similar struggles, and there are resources available to help you navigate your feelings and experiences. Organizations that focus on LGBTQ+ issues often provide support groups, counseling services, and educational resources that can be invaluable. Seeking help is a sign of strength, and taking steps to understand and accept your identity is a crucial part of your mental health journey.
In conclusion, understanding mental health struggles related to gender identity involves recognizing the complexities of gender, the impact of societal norms, and the importance of seeking support. Your feelings are valid, and reaching out for help is a courageous step towards finding peace and acceptance within yourself.
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