Premature Ejaculation: Causes and Solutions for Couples

Sad topics

Hello, doctor: I have a question.
The day before yesterday, during intimacy with my husband, he ejaculated right at the moment of penetration after foreplay.
Everything calmed down afterward, and my husband felt very disappointed.
I feel sad for him.
I want to take him on a vacation this weekend to help him relax.
Can you tell me what might be the cause of this? Is it what they call premature ejaculation? You are my most trusted doctor, and I would like to hear your advice on what to do.
Thank you.

huanzhe, 30~39 year old female. Ask Date: 2013/06/19

Dr. Lin Wenbin reply Obstetrics and Gynecology

Premature ejaculation is related to many factors and is not solely a medical condition, so it shouldn't be viewed too seriously.
This way, your husband can feel more at ease.
Sometimes, when the body is very tired, a husband may feel compelled to engage in sexual activity due to a sense of responsibility (fulfilling obligations).
In such cases, the body responds honestly, leading to premature ejaculation as a way to conserve energy.
There are many ways to improve the situation; first, assess both your and your partner's physical condition.
If work has been exhausting, that day you can focus on foreplay without penetration.
Let your husband know that you are satisfied with just the foreplay.
This can alleviate his psychological pressure, potentially reducing the occurrence of premature ejaculation.
During sexual activity, using masturbation to reach climax beforehand can also be a considerate approach for your husband.
Additionally, opting for thicker condoms (which are often less expensive than ultra-thin ones) can reduce stimulation during penetration and help prevent premature ejaculation.
You don't need to explain too much; just express your preference for this type of condom.
Your husband will likely accommodate your preference and should not refuse.
This way, a fulfilling outcome can be achieved.

Reply Date: 2013/06/19

More Info

Premature ejaculation (PE) is a common sexual dysfunction that affects many men at some point in their lives. It is characterized by ejaculation that occurs sooner than desired, either before or shortly after penetration, leading to distress for both partners. Understanding the causes and potential solutions can help couples navigate this sensitive issue.

Causes of Premature Ejaculation
1. Psychological Factors: Anxiety, stress, and relationship issues can significantly contribute to premature ejaculation. Performance anxiety, in particular, can create a cycle where the fear of not satisfying a partner leads to quicker ejaculation.

2. Biological Factors: Certain biological factors may also play a role, including hormonal imbalances, neurotransmitter levels, and sensitivity of the penis. Conditions such as prostatitis or other medical issues can also contribute.

3. Lack of Experience: For younger men or those who have not had much sexual experience, the excitement of sexual activity can lead to quicker ejaculation.

4. Cultural and Societal Influences: Societal expectations and cultural norms regarding masculinity and sexual performance can create pressure, leading to anxiety and premature ejaculation.

Solutions for Couples
1. Communication: Open and honest communication between partners is crucial. Discussing feelings, desires, and concerns can help alleviate anxiety and foster intimacy. This can also help the partner who is experiencing PE feel supported rather than ashamed.

2. Techniques to Delay Ejaculation: There are several techniques that can help manage premature ejaculation:
- Start-Stop Technique: This involves stopping sexual stimulation before the point of ejaculation and then starting again once the urge subsides.

- Squeeze Technique: This involves squeezing the penis at the base when the urge to ejaculate is felt, which can help delay ejaculation.

- Pelvic Floor Exercises: Strengthening the pelvic floor muscles through Kegel exercises can improve control over ejaculation.

3. Professional Help: If premature ejaculation persists, seeking help from a healthcare professional or a sex therapist can be beneficial. They can provide tailored advice and may suggest behavioral therapy, counseling, or medication if necessary.

4. Medications: In some cases, medications such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) or topical anesthetics can be prescribed to help delay ejaculation.

5. Education: Understanding sexual response and anatomy can help both partners feel more comfortable and confident. This can reduce anxiety and improve overall sexual satisfaction.

Conclusion
It’s important to remember that premature ejaculation is a common issue and can be addressed with the right strategies and support. Encouraging your partner to seek help and exploring solutions together can strengthen your relationship and enhance intimacy. A weekend getaway can also serve as a wonderful opportunity to relax and reconnect, allowing both partners to focus on each other without the pressure of performance.
If the issue continues to cause distress, consider consulting a healthcare provider who specializes in sexual health for further evaluation and personalized treatment options. Remember, you are not alone in this, and many couples successfully navigate this challenge together.

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