Unexplained Anger and Suicidal Thoughts: A Guide

I have been feeling angry for no apparent reason lately. Could you please advise, Dr. Ding?

I have been feeling angry for no reason lately.
I get upset with my family over just one comment (which didn't use to bother me), and I find myself thinking about killing someone and then laughing about it.
I also keep contemplating ways to commit suicide...
What should I do?

Ping, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2016/01/28

Dr. Ding Shuyan reply Psychiatry

Hello, you must be in middle school! During this stage leading up to high school, we often experience significant changes and emotional challenges, but usually, we manage to get through them successfully.
However, when situations become more difficult, it's important to learn to seek help instead of facing everything alone.
If possible, parents are the best source of support because, despite any nagging or communication difficulties, they will inherently care for and assist us.
If there are issues you prefer not to share with your parents, I suggest talking to a trusted teacher at school.
If there are no specific reasons not to, seeking help from a guidance counselor is usually the best option.
Sharing your feelings with close friends can also be a way to express emotions, but keep in mind that your friends are likely your age as well.
If you simply vent and feel better, that's fine, but if thoughts of suicide persist, it can become a burden for your friends over time.
Suicidal thoughts typically don't last long, so it's crucial to temporarily redirect your attention to other activities instead of sitting there dwelling on them, and absolutely do not act on them.
If you're feeling overwhelmed, please reach out to someone or make a phone call.
Suicide is never a solution to problems.
Let's talk again when you have the opportunity.
Wishing you all the best, Dr.
Ding Shuo-Yan.

Reply Date: 2016/01/28

More Info

It sounds like you're going through a very challenging time, and I want to acknowledge the pain and confusion you're experiencing. The feelings of unexplained anger, thoughts of self-harm, and even violent thoughts towards others can be alarming and distressing. It's important to understand that these feelings are often symptoms of deeper emotional or psychological issues that need to be addressed.

Firstly, the experience of sudden anger can be linked to various factors, including stress, unresolved trauma, or underlying mental health conditions such as depression or anxiety. When we feel overwhelmed, our emotional responses can become heightened, leading to irritability and anger over seemingly minor triggers. This is often a sign that something deeper is at play, and it’s crucial to explore these feelings in a safe and supportive environment.

The thoughts of harming yourself or others are particularly concerning. These thoughts can stem from feelings of hopelessness, frustration, or a sense of being trapped in your current situation. It's essential to take these thoughts seriously. They are not just fleeting ideas; they indicate that you may be in a state of emotional crisis.
Here are some steps you can take to address these feelings:
1. Seek Professional Help: The most important step is to reach out to a mental health professional. A therapist or psychiatrist can provide you with the support and guidance you need. They can help you explore the root causes of your anger and suicidal thoughts, and work with you to develop coping strategies. If you’ve had negative experiences with healthcare providers in the past, it’s understandable to feel hesitant, but finding the right therapist can make a significant difference.

2. Talk About Your Feelings: It can be incredibly beneficial to talk about what you’re feeling with someone you trust. This could be a friend, family member, or a support group. Expressing your feelings can help you process them and reduce the burden of carrying them alone.

3. Develop Coping Strategies: Learning healthy coping mechanisms can help you manage your anger and suicidal thoughts. Techniques such as mindfulness, deep breathing exercises, or physical activity can help you calm your mind and body. Journaling your thoughts and feelings can also provide an outlet for your emotions.

4. Identify Triggers: Try to identify what specifically triggers your anger. Is it certain situations, comments, or stressors? Understanding your triggers can help you anticipate and manage your reactions more effectively.

5. Create a Safety Plan: If you ever feel overwhelmed by thoughts of self-harm or harming others, it’s crucial to have a safety plan in place. This could include a list of people to contact, coping strategies to use, and emergency resources like hotlines or crisis centers.

6. Practice Self-Care: Engage in activities that promote your well-being. This could include hobbies, exercise, spending time in nature, or anything that brings you joy and relaxation. Taking care of your physical health can also positively impact your mental health.

7. Limit Substance Use: If you consume alcohol or drugs, consider reducing or eliminating these substances. They can exacerbate feelings of anger and depression and impair your judgment.

Remember, you are not alone in this struggle, and there is help available. It’s crucial to take these feelings seriously and seek the support you need. Your life is valuable, and there are people who care and want to help you through this difficult time. Please consider reaching out for help as soon as possible.

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