Overcoming Social Anxiety: Navigating Awkwardness in Group Settings - Psychiatry

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It can be awkward to be in the same space with others?


Hello, doctor.
Actually, I will be starting my internship at the hospital next week.
I'm worried about my work and afraid of being scolded by my instructors or senior colleagues.
However, what concerns me the most is my social interaction...
I have to intern with six people I don't know and even live with them for 18 days.
It's not that I dislike them; I'm just really afraid of awkwardness and not having anything to say during our interactions.
I often find myself overthinking others' thoughts, like wondering, "Will they think I'm too quiet and decide not to talk to me?" or "Will they think I'm so clueless that I can't even use this equipment?" I even feel like my personality is quite strange.
But if I try to deliberately change myself in that environment and emotional state, I feel even more exhausted.
I know I need to accept myself, and I tell myself, "There are many different personalities in the world; it's just that mine happens to be this way." At first, this was quite effective, but now I feel like I've become awkward and uncomfortable in social situations again, as if I'm reverting to the "strange" version of myself in my own eyes...
What should I do? Will this prevent me from making friends or having a boyfriend...?

Yuan'er, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2016/08/11

Dr. Liang Sunyuan reply Psychiatry


Hello, imagine that this internship system has been in place for many years, and most people can navigate it successfully, including those who may feel anxious or shy.
It is natural to experience anticipatory anxiety before the internship begins, but often, once the actual internship starts, the level of anxiety decreases as attention shifts to the learning content of the internship.
In fact, redirecting focus from oneself to the people, tasks, and situations that need to be learned or faced is an effective way to reduce personal anxiety.
This generation values individuality, and even if you are less talkative, most people will respect your personal traits.
I suggest fully accepting yourself first; this will allow your behavior to come across naturally and comfortably.
Similarly, treating others with a fully accepting and respectful attitude will likely yield positive results.
Wishing you a successful internship.

Reply Date: 2016/08/11

More Info


Overcoming social anxiety, especially in group settings like your upcoming internship, can be a daunting challenge. It's completely normal to feel apprehensive about interacting with new people, particularly in a high-pressure environment where you might fear judgment or rejection. Here are some strategies and insights that may help you navigate this situation more comfortably.


Understanding Social Anxiety
Social anxiety is characterized by an intense fear of social situations where one might be scrutinized or judged. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy, embarrassment, and a strong desire to avoid social interactions altogether. It's important to recognize that many people experience similar feelings, and you're not alone in this struggle. Understanding that social anxiety is a common issue can help normalize your feelings and reduce the pressure you place on yourself.


Preparing for Your Internship
1. Set Realistic Expectations: Acknowledge that it's okay to feel nervous. Instead of aiming for perfection in social interactions, focus on being present and engaging with your peers. Remember, everyone is likely feeling a bit anxious, too.

2. Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself. It's easy to fall into negative self-talk, especially when you worry about how others perceive you. Instead, remind yourself that your worth isn't determined by your social performance. Accepting your personality as it is can be liberating.

3. Develop Conversation Starters: Prepare a few topics or questions in advance that you can use to initiate conversations. These could be related to your internship, shared interests, or even light-hearted topics. Having a mental list can ease the pressure of thinking on the spot.

4. Focus on Listening: Engaging in conversations doesn't always mean you have to be the one talking. Practice active listening, which can take the pressure off you to fill every silence. Ask open-ended questions and show genuine interest in what others are saying.

5. Challenge Negative Thoughts: When you catch yourself thinking, "They must think I'm quiet and weird," challenge that thought. Ask yourself if there's evidence to support it. Often, our fears are exaggerated and not based on reality.


Building Connections
1. Find Common Ground: Look for shared experiences or interests with your peers. This could be related to your field of study, hobbies, or even the challenges of the internship itself. Finding common ground can help foster connections and ease awkwardness.

2. Engage in Group Activities: If there are opportunities for group activities or team-building exercises during your internship, participate actively. These settings can help break the ice and create a more relaxed atmosphere.

3. Be Open About Your Feelings: If you feel comfortable, consider sharing your feelings of anxiety with a trusted peer or mentor. You might find that they relate to your experiences, which can create a sense of camaraderie.


Seeking Professional Help
If you find that your social anxiety significantly impacts your daily life or hinders your ability to form relationships, consider seeking professional help. A therapist can provide you with tailored strategies to manage anxiety and improve your social skills. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is particularly effective for social anxiety, as it helps individuals challenge and change negative thought patterns.


Conclusion
Remember, it's perfectly okay to be yourself, even if that means being quieter or more reserved in social settings. Embrace your unique personality and recognize that everyone has their own quirks. Over time, as you gain more experience in social situations, your confidence will likely grow. Focus on building connections at your own pace, and don't hesitate to reach out for support when needed. With practice and patience, you can navigate your internship successfully and build meaningful relationships along the way. Good luck!

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