Struggling with Mental Health: A Journey Through Trauma and Isolation

I am sick?

I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling this way.
It's really important that you talk to someone who can help you, such as a mental health professional.

Yuxin, 10~19 year old female. Ask Date: 2018/03/15

Dr. Zhang Fangrong reply Psychiatry

Dear Sir/Madam,
Thank you for your inquiry and for your response.
From your description, I can sense the pressure you are experiencing, particularly regarding your interactions with family and classmates.
I also notice that your self-awareness and concern are quite commendable, including your understanding of your psychological changes, your interactions with family, and the aspects that may be harmful to yourself.

Since you mentioned that you also have epilepsy, it is essential to regularly visit a neurologist and psychiatrist for check-ups and to adhere to your medication regimen.
Additionally, the psychiatrist can help monitor your emotional expressions, interpersonal interactions, and self-harming behaviors.
There is also an opportunity to discuss aspects related to Munchausen syndrome, as you are still quite young.
If possible, consider the option of returning to school.
I recommend consulting with a psychiatrist or psychologist nearby for further evaluation and treatment.
Wishing you good mental and physical health.
Sincerely,
Dr.
Fang-Rong Chang, Psychiatrist

Reply Date: 2018/03/15

More Info

I'm truly sorry to hear about the challenges you've been facing. It sounds like you've been through a lot, and it's understandable to feel overwhelmed by your experiences. Your situation is complex, and it's important to approach it with care and understanding.

From what you've described, it seems you may be experiencing symptoms associated with trauma, anxiety, and possibly depression. The feelings of isolation, self-harm, and the sense of being misunderstood by your family are significant indicators that you could benefit from professional help. It's crucial to recognize that these feelings and behaviors are not uncommon among individuals who have faced trauma, bullying, and neglect.

Understanding Your Feelings
1. Trauma and Its Effects: The experiences you've had, including bullying, neglect, and the traumatic incident of sexual assault, can lead to a range of psychological responses. Trauma can manifest in various ways, including anxiety, depression, and dissociative symptoms, which may explain your feelings of being disconnected from reality or pretending to be in a different state of consciousness.

2. Dissociation: The behavior you described, such as pretending to be in a dream-like state or having another personality, can be a form of dissociation. This is often a coping mechanism that individuals use to deal with overwhelming emotions or memories. It’s a way for your mind to protect itself from the pain of your experiences.

3. Self-Harm: Engaging in self-harm can be a way to cope with emotional pain. It’s important to understand that while it may provide temporary relief, it does not address the underlying issues and can lead to further emotional distress.

4. Family Dynamics: The feeling of being overlooked or neglected by your family, especially in comparison to your sister, can exacerbate feelings of worthlessness and isolation. It’s painful when those we seek support from do not respond in the way we need.

Seeking Help
1. Professional Support: It’s crucial to seek help from a mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. They can provide a safe space for you to express your feelings and experiences without judgment. Therapy can help you process your trauma, develop coping strategies, and work towards healing.

2. Medication: If you are diagnosed with depression or anxiety, medication may be an option to discuss with a psychiatrist. While some people have concerns about medication, it can be an effective part of treatment for many individuals, especially when combined with therapy.

3. Support Groups: Connecting with others who have experienced similar challenges can be incredibly validating. Support groups provide a sense of community and understanding that can help you feel less isolated.

4. Expressive Outlets: Since you mentioned a passion for acting, consider exploring creative outlets as a form of expression. Engaging in art, writing, or drama can be therapeutic and provide a way to process your emotions.

Coping Strategies
1. Mindfulness and Grounding Techniques: Practicing mindfulness can help you stay present and reduce feelings of anxiety. Techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or grounding exercises can be beneficial.

2. Journaling: Writing about your thoughts and feelings can be a powerful way to process your experiences. It can help you gain clarity and understand your emotions better.

3. Building a Support Network: While it may feel challenging, try to reach out to friends or trusted individuals who can provide support. Having someone to talk to can make a significant difference.

4. Setting Boundaries: If family pressure to work or engage socially feels overwhelming, it’s okay to set boundaries. Communicate your needs to your family, and prioritize your mental health.

Conclusion
Your feelings are valid, and it’s important to prioritize your mental health. You are not alone in this journey, and there are resources and professionals who can help you navigate through these difficult times. Please consider reaching out for help, as it can be a crucial step towards healing and finding a path forward. Remember, it’s okay to ask for support, and taking that step can lead to positive changes in your life.

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